STEPH DEROSA: LET�S OPEN THE MAILBAG >>>

During my visit at The Hub restaurant, you know it was inevitable that I take a gander at the restroom. So here it is.

Since my short trip into the potties really didn't spark any memories or useless diatribes for me to vent with this week, I thought I would take the time to answer some of my reader e-mail.

Yes, I do get reader e-mail. Most of it could probably be considered hate e-mail, and the rest of it should just be considered junk e-mail. Which is why I've never really brought it up until now. Sometimes it's someone I've mentioned in the blog, writing to tell me it was good to read¦ blah, blah, blah¦ and my response to them: Thank you, but why didn't you leave a damn comment in the blog?
Other times the e-mail has some seriously thought provoking questions like:

Hey Steph,
Your writing reminds me of a dog. Not an AKC kind of dog like a Greyhound or anything, but more like a mutt I once adopted at the Humane Society. What kind of dog food would you recommend I feed my dog while I read your columns?

Well hello there. I can see you are a being of high intelligence. Most people are transfixed into becoming something better than they already normally are. For example: a superhero, a millionaire, or even a rock star. But no, you posses the need to become a DOG.

Now to answer your question, I really don't think there's that big of a difference in dog food. I used to feed my pup nothing but Science Diet. That is until one day I had to make an emergency run to Safeway for some Pedigree. Her energy level, weight and poop stench all stayed the same¬" so I really saw no need to kill myself over the extra trip to a specialty pet store anymore. It was Pedigree from then on.

Dear Mrs. DeRosa,
You are such a bitch. I love Death Cab for Cutie! What the fuck is wrong with you???? Please, go get a life and learn to listen to REAL music. Peace.

Thank blog you put peace at the end or I might've thought you really hated me. This line of questioning really does not deserve an answer.

S-
Need a beer. Downstairs playing Tiger Woods.
-D

Oh good grief. I used to find this comedic for some reason. Eight years later, and I still find it comedic. Mr. DeRosa got his beer.

Hi Steph,
I thought it was awesome how you talked about that girl who brags a lot. I have a couple of friends who are always bragging about their clothes, or how guys look at them, or what they just bought. I hate it.

Sometimes when I'm in bed and about to go to sleep I have these dream like things where I take a knife and cut all their hair off. Omg it's sooooo creepy but I can't help it sometimes. I really hate them and you made me feel better knowing that I'm not alone. Thank you.

Dear Carrie,
You're welcome?

LINK: Toilet Tales archive
LINK: Steph DeRosa in the Volcano forums