The Tacoma Files: Ron Swarner

By Daniel Blue on August 26, 2008

DANIEL BLUE: MEET RON SWARNER >>>

Tacomafilesart Ron Swarner is the co-owner, publisher, editor, and master and magician of the Weekly Volcano. There are few people who work as hard in this town to achieve what they know in their hearts to be their passion. It will be hard to write about Ron without writing about his paper, but seeing as that would seem like shameless self advertising, I will try to write about the man's character instead.

Tacomafilesronswarner Raised by hippies in the mountains of Zimbabwe, Ron was a special child from the very start. He could speak all seven dialects of the Swahili people by the age of 5 and began a sort of word of mouth news network from village to village that included advertisements for local goats milk for which he received a pig's bladder full every month. His fondest memories are of helping his mother churn the fresh goat milk into cheese. He would take half the cheese to the capitol city of Harare where he quickly learned English from a wealthy safari hunting man named (no shit) Volcano Joe.

Murky details surround Ron's youth, rumor has it that Volcano Joe's dying wish put him on a boat to America, a boat that sailed into our very own Commencement Bay.

LINK: The Tacoma Files archive