STEPH DEROSA: TACOMA NORDSTROM GALA SEPT. 30, 2008 >>>

Nordy’s got me drunk last night. I’m not gonna lie. While most every other “media” person has given you the boring, obvious report of how the new Tacoma Nordstrom store is bigger, shinier, more selection, blah blah, blah â€" this social girl is just now rollin’ out of bed from treating last night like a party. I need some Pepto, stat!

Upon our arrival, Brian Townsend (Tacoma Mall Nordstrom’s store manager) was called to give JCB and me a personal, guided tour. He was so proud of his new baby; you could see it in his eyes. I asked him how he was feeling inside, and he was obviously very relieved, “It’s like planning a wedding. All that time, and that day is finally here.”

As we made our way across the expansive, shiny floors we heard a voice call, “Daddy! Daaaadeeeee!” Mr. Townsend looked at us, smiled and said, “That’s my daughter and her boyfriend.”

“Daddy? Can I have these shoes? Look how cute they are! They match perfect! Please?”

“Just one! One pair only!” he replied.

My mind immediately started playing “Damn, it feels good to be a gangster.” I was envious. I would love to have all Nordstrom’s shoes at my disposal. Mr. Townsend was letting his daughter have a pair of shoes because remember: this is a special occasion, like a wedding.

The most brilliant move in Nordstrom’s Opening Gala planning was putting free drinks in between the two things that attract women the most: shoes and makeup. That is damn brilliant, Nordy’s, damn brilliant. I dropped a pretty penny on some Mac makeup after a T-Town Tini, that’s for sure.

JCB and I had fun making jokes about some of the shoes. Sorry Nordy’s. There were simply too many to like them all. That’s what you get for trying to please everyone, Nordstrom’s. Although we did think Matt Driscoll already had a pair of these gold, shiny kicks.

Mojitos flowed like the Puyallup River. Minus the Salmon. One after the other, the Mojitos came to us. Constantly. At times we double fisted. Yes, we got lit. I palled around with my hilarious friend Jessica Corddry for a bit, who does nothing but instigate trouble.

We liked all the cute waiters. A lot. One had a black eye, and we thought that was extra hot. Corddry found out it was from playing Rugby. Oh, man, even hotter. Then friend Allison Swarner pointed out that Rugby players hug a lot while playing the sport. Sweaty, dirty, grunting men piled up on each other? I just about had to excuse myself for a moment alone.

It was at that point the poor Rugby-playing waiter ran away from us.

But seriously, look how cute the waiters were.

The Dudley Manlove Quartet jazzed up some amazing ’80s covers that set the tone of our evening, making it all right. JCB quickly realized there were five men in the quartet, and that if she Googled “Dudley Manlove Quartet” she’d probably run into a few porn websites.

I had a blast running into and hanging out with the Swarner ladies, a ton of Tacoma bloggers, Jennifer Colley from Posh Home, my girl JCB, and Jessica Corddry. What a fantastically good time we had. Thank you, Nordy’s! And thank you to the Gala’s benefactors, Tacoma Art Museum and Museum of Glass, for being a part of what makes Tacoma cool.

LINK: More gala photos on the Photo Hot Spot