OWEN TAYLOR: ALL-OUT ASSAULT ON THE VIRGINITY OF YOR PRECIOUS LITTLE NOTIONS >>>

Recently I was able to catch up with Sex Vid frontman and Olympia luminary Judd Taylor on his way to the gym to workout. Upon meeting Taylor, most would assume his simple, unkempt appearance and wispy receding hairs swaying in the breeze make him appear more like Wallace Shawn of Princess Bride fame or a Trekkie on a bender, and less like the avatar of hardcore that he is. The founder and former proprietor of Phantom City Records in downtown Olympia recently sold the business to focus more on touring and writing with the band, which has steadily built a massive international following due to its ultra-vicious sound, which many in the scene have likened to the formidable Void. Their newest LP, Communal Living, has come out to mostly favorable reviews, save for the internet haters whose profoundly useless existence will eventually be null and void much the same as all of our nuclear fates. But I digress.

Taylor says that physical fitness is paramount to his job performance. “Every band that isn’t on the show is pissed at us because they’re not playing, and they’ll be at the show. So ya know, that’ll be fun to see.” He then went on to describe an array of upper body strength-building exercises he partakes in, though I was having trouble envisioning the former record clerk posted on two dumbbells.

Then I saw a Sex Vid show.

Dig if you will this picture: A four-cornered room barely big enough for a twin bed that would rent for $750 on Capitol Hill in Seattle. A four piece hardcore band in the corner. Throngs of girls with half-shaved heads and loosely layered flannels and torn American Apparel stretch pants veering in every direction all at once â€" a phalanx of rapture and disgust, sexy spiny pufferfish whose spikes are bedazzled with anger and orgasmic wrath. More sweaty shirtless men rubbing on each other than a Ricky Martin fantasy chamber, except that they don’t really like each other, or anything for that matter, but smashing and flailing and singing every lyric like they know it â€" because they do. Off in the corner, a huge beard and glasses swimming in a swami’s trance, meditating on the pit he’s about to enter by swallowing the guitar tones whole until he drowns and falls in. It’s salvation for the lost tribes of restless youth ...

Tonight at Old School Pizzeria, Taylor and Sex Vid will pummel Olympia’s senses with a hardcore show that can only be classified as epic. The band will be supporting role Extortion â€" who are in the midst of a West Coast tour. Expect an all-out assault on the virginity of your precious little notions of what you thought you knew.

[Old School Pizzeria, with Extortion and Iron Lung, Saturday, Jan. 31, 10 p.m., $5, 108 Franklin St. N.E., Olympia, 360.786.9640]