MICHAEL SWAN: SOME LIKE IT COLD >>>

South Sounders tend to get creative in the helter swelter. Besides crafting explicit fantasies about sitting on a block of ice or getting clocked by an exploding fire hydrant, the stuff soft-drink commercials are made of, our survival in the summer heat includes many cooling down alternatives. Like television.

Click! Cable TV has invented Cool TV. If you need a psychosomatic injection of chill, the Tacoma-based cable television company advises its customers to click on “Click! 1” (channel 1 for those with cable receivers or channel 117 for those without a receiver) through Thursday for pictures of recent winter snowstorms in the Tacoma area snapped by Kevin Freitas. The pictures will be accompanied by appropriate music and sounds of the season.

Of course, while you mentally chill on Click 1, your body is slowly dying of heat exhaustion. Be sure to click on the Tacoma-Pierce County Health Department Web site for tips on surviving the heat.