The Weekly Volcano follows the people you're too embarrassed to >>>

Just like most good, new-age, social media applications, Twitter allows people to share and be privy to once personal, almost wholly pointless information about peoples' lives. It's seemingly endless. While Twitter is mostly full of everyday, ho-hum people - just like you and me, sharing info about what type of oatmeal we ate for breakfast and where we get our hair cut - Twitter is also a magnet for the moderately-famous.

Stars of yesterday, illiterate millionaire athletes, former cast members of Saved By the Bell - you can follow them all, intimately, on Twitter.

But, you've got standards. We get that.

That's why we'll do it for you, in a feature we like to call Weekly Volcano Twitter Stalker.

This week, checking in with...

Larry King

May 7: Larry King gets pumped up for SNL, wears suspenders and sexy jeans

"Who's excited about Betty White hosting SNL tomorrow?" via Twitpic, 11:30 a.m.

April 28: Larry King hangs with the upper crust - who have enough time for a photo, but not enough time to get off the phone (unless that's a staged call).

"After the show with the Trumps!" via Twitpic, 7:35 p.m.

April 23: WTF?

"Having lunch now with @RyanSeacrest!" via Web, 1:28 p.m.

Tune in tomorrow for more tweets from the life of Larry King

WE'D LIKE TO THANK THE ACADEMY >>>

Being the megalomaniacal a-hole that I am, sometimes in the shower I craft award acceptance speeches for prizes I haven't actually won. Usually, since even I have no illusions of my fantasy football or "Words with Friends" skills ever achieving greatness, these make-believe awards have to do with our work at the Weekly Volcano. Maybe the City Club of Tacoma will someday realize the brilliance of the Volcano's constant jokes about their age and socio-economic status, and honor our paper as the trailblazer it is? Who knows? Stranger things have happened.

Maybe.

The point is: If it does ever happen, I'll be prepared.

Like this morning.

While I had envisioned this moment being far grander, I feel a need to say thank you today - to the Volcano's friends, families, lovers, detractors, fans, fiends, foes and followers. Really, truly (glance over at my lovely wife, give her a knowing nod of recognition during this moment of triumph) - this wouldn't have been possible without you.

You see, Weekly Volcano World Headquarters was officially vandalized and wheat-pasted by self-ascribed Anarchists last night. We're pretty sure it had to do with this story, though it could have also had something to do with this story. The main point is, we arrived at work this morning to find most of the walls of our building plastered with poorly copy-edited "anarchist" prose and pink spray paint - at least the walls where an "anarchist" could crouch unnoticed and spray paint without the risk of being caught. Ballsy.

We'd like to take a moment to say thank you! Thank you. Thank you so much. On behalf of the Weekly Volcano I'd like to thank the academy, and all the little people we've stepped on during our accent to greatness. Every trudge was an honor.

Today I honestly feel like we've finally made it.

(Cue sappy music played by bemused Tacoma Symphony Orchestra. Presenter Rick Talbert tries to tug me off stage, but I hold firm for one more line. ...)

You love us! You really, really love us!

More visual proof:

ON A SUNNY SUNDAY ... >>>

This much you might already know:

1. Pierce County designed the Chamber Bay Golf Course a former gravel mine overlooking Puget Sound in order to host national tournaments and cater to affluent golfers. The view is spectacular. And everyone and their mother enjoy the paved paths for exercise and leisurely strolls.

2. With 200 square miles of forest, 34 of which remain snow-covered year round, plus 25 glaciers, Mount Rainier National Park is impressive by any standard.

3. The Mt. Rainier Railroad Dining Co. in Elbe serves fill-course meals in a stationary dinner car from the 1910s. The attached Side-Track Room is a full-service bar with a karaoke/darts area. For $115 a night, you can overnight in their rustic caboose, The Hobo Inn.

4. The Last Exit Pub and Grill opened late last year in the closed Jambalaya spot, formerly known as From the Bayou, next to Pacific Lutheran University. They are known to serve a delicious burger.

5. Engine House No. 9 - housed in a 1907 fire station just off Sixth Avenue on Pine street - hosts live music every Sunday from 6-9 p.m. and they do so without charging a cover.

What I discovered yesterday:

Read more...

THEY ARE THE WORLD >>>

Opened less than a month, The Green Coconut Tree in Lakewood already has a steady packed lunch crowd. The tiny joint serves Chinese, Vietnamese and ... yes a full complement of Jamaican cuisine.

Green Coconut Tree offers many of the dishes one might find in Jamaica: curried chicken, curried goat, curried potatoes, jerk chicken, beef patties, fried plantains, roti, oxtail and beans and rice. The ripe plantains, sliced thin and sautéed with butter and a bit of sugar and salt, come on the side of most plates or can be ordered à la carte. The curries are spicy but not too hot, and the goat in particular is very flavorful.

The jerk chicken sandwich was delicious, if a little small. The saltfish, however, excelled on all fronts - perfectly cooked and spiced, mixed with butterbeans, green onion, tomatoes and fresh thyme, and served with a side of plantains.

Of course I ordered a couple ginger beers to wash it down.

I'll report on the Chinese and Vietnamese dishes next time. Pho noodle soups, rice dishes, chicken curry, Kung Pao dishes, lemon grass chicken, pan-fired noodle dishes, rice vermicelli noodle soups and bubble tea await.

[Green Coconut Tree, 10 a.m. to 9 p.m. Monday-Saturday, 10 a.m. to 7 p.m. Sunday, 8813 Edgewater Dr. SW, Lakewood, 253.473.4444]

CONCERT ALERT >>>

Live Nation is brining Limp Bizket and Ice Cube to White River Amphitheatre on Sunday, Aug. 15, 2010 at 7 p.m. 

Tickets are $20 and $49.50 and go on sale Saturday, May 15 at 10 a.m. at LiveNation.com, all Ticketmaster outlets, or charge by phone at 800.745.3000.

CONCERT ALERT >>>

After an 11 year hiatus, Sarah McLachlan has revived the Lilith Tour (originally the Lilith Fair) that she helped found in 1996.

In keeping with the original female-centric tours from 1997-99, McLachlan is bringing a number of top female artists including A Fine Frenzy, Grace Potter and the Nocturnals, Sheryl Crow, Sugarland, Marina and the Diamonds, Ann Atomic, The Submarines, Erykah Badu, and Colbie Caillat to The Gorge Amphitheatre Saturday, July 3.

McLachlan, who will also perform at Lilith, is slated to release The Laws of Illusion, her first studio effort in seven years, on Tuesday, June 15, a few weeks before the tour starts.

Ticket prices and an on sale date haven't been released, although something is brewing here.

NIBBLETS OF INFORMATION >>>

Back Open: The Suburban Times reported that the Bair Drug in Steilacoom reopened Saturday. A sign on Bair's door says they'll reopen again tomorrow. TNT Diner has the scoop on its latest transformation.

Tea Class: Explore the world of tea with Tobin Ropes, co-owner of Mad Hat Tea Company, from 7-9 p.m. inside the Mandolin Cafe. Learn how different foods complement a variety of teas. Tea tasting, light snacks and informational materials provided. RSVP for space at 253.761.3482.

Cheap Pints: Engine House No. 9 offers $2.50 pints of any beer every Tuesday.

Today In Elbe: The Mt. Rainier Railroad Dining Co. hosts Old Farts Darts every Tuesday at 2 p.m. inside its Side Track Room.

Half-price Wine: Maxwell's Speakeasy knocks off 50 percent on wine tonight.

Future Things Are Coming: Thea's Market and Deli will host a Seattle Beer Tasting including beers from Pike, Hales, Elysian and Scuttlebutt Thursday, May 13 at 8 p.m. The cost is $5, which includes light appetizers. Thea's Market is at 1705 Dock St. by the Museum of Glass.

Food Matters: Contrary to popular belief, natural, pesticide-free food won't make you skinny.

LINK: Restaurant coupons

LINK: Wine and beer tastings, dinners and events

LINK: South Sound Restaurant Guide

LINK: Send us your restaurant and lounge news

TUESDAY, MAY 11, 2010 >>>

1. The Grand Cinema will screen the true 33mm print of the classic 1941 film The Maltese Falcon at 7 p.m. Directed by John Huston and starring Humphrey Bogart, this film appears on many lists as one of greatest of all times. This is the film version of this year's Tacoma Reads book by Dashiell Hammett. 

2. They say that once you learn how to ride a bike, you're pretty much set for life - until the tire pops, your bar tape frays, and the shifting gets a little funky. Have no fear, Tacoma-Pierce County's Bike Month is here ... with a cyclefit and maintenance seminar by expert Tony Corke from 6:30-7:30 p.m. inside Tacoma Bike.

3. British author and journalist Martin Jacques discusses "China's 21^st Century: When China Rules the World" at 7 p.m. inside PLU's University Center.

4. Steve Stefanowicz will be at Dawson's Bar and Grill's Open Mic at 7 p.m. Just saying.

5. Summit Pub Puyallup. Tim Hall & The Band Real Times performs at 7:30 p.m. inside the Summit Pub in Puyallup.

LINK: Arts and entertainment events in the South Sound

SIDESHOW ON SIXTH >>>

There's nothing like the life of a circus performer. You get to pass yourself off as hailing from an exotic Eastern locale, even if you're really an ex-paralegal from Yonkers. And you can turn the most mundane of household experiences into a thrilling center-ring attraction if you're clever and creative enough ... as in hammering spikes into your skull.

For nearly a decade Donny Vomit has been performing acts of a strange, bizarre, odd and macabre nature at Coney Island. As Master of Ceremonies of the Sideshow, he pounds nails into his skull, tosses chainsaws with the greatest of ease, and subjects victims to his electric chair in the fashion of a true gentleman oddity.

This chap will be in Tacoma this Thursday for a meet and secrete at, of course, The Red Hot. Tacoma's Sixth Avenue hot doggery will host Mr. Vomit, as well as plenty of Human Blockhead Ale by Schmaltz Brewing.

Watching the pounding while pounding brews and dogs.

Human Blockhead Night

Thursday, May 13, 6 p.m., no cover
The Red Hot, 2914 sixth Ave., Tacoma
253.779.0229

LINK: 99 Bottles in Federal Way hosts Vomit on Friday at 5 p.m.

WHAT WE HAVE FOUND TODAY >>>

Latest in beer technology: a see-through box

Some black holes can kill entire galaxies.

Playboy jumps on the 3-D bandwagon with a 3-D centerfold spread.

AT&T has the iPhone exclusively through 2012.