BRING ON THE WEEKEND >>>
Honestly, it would probably be best to let this week slide - to mysteriously (and probably unnoticed) duck out of my regular Prefunk obligations. The South Sound has already been forced to endure nearly 10,000 words from me this week (most with the expert help of Paul Schrag), and coming of that high of quasi-journalistic indulgence, a quick 500 words on ways you can get fucked up this weekend seems a little uncalled for.
But, shit. We're almost halfway now there. Might as well get rolling with another fine installment of The Prefunk, a weekend primer for you and your liver (with a picture of an alcoholic household pet thrown in for good measure).
Continues through Saturday and Sunday at Chamber's Bay Golf Course (Ladenburg Links)
So, Tiger Woods got a divorce and - by god! - golf is exciting again. I don't follow golf religiously (as I think guys that do that are a little out there), but last I heard Tiger was tied for first place at Barclays, hitting the ball "flush" for the first time since, well, lots of broads were hitting his balls flush. (Oh snap!)
Now, don't get me wrong. Tiger Woods will not be at finale of this week's 110th U.S. Amateur Championship, which has been going on all week at Chambers Bay Golf Course. He wont be anywhere near it, in fact. Tiger woods hasn't been an amateur since... Damn! These jokes work a lot better when the precluding sentence includes the words "balls" and "flush."
Anyway, there will be plenty of uber-talented golfers at Chambers Bay for the culmination of what's been an impressive week of play - even if none of them are named Tiger Woods. Much like catching the next big band in some small club before they break, you could find yourself watching the NEXT Tiger Woods tee off - young, innocent, not gross, golf yet to have scored them even one BJ. It's golf the way it was intended: pure, unadulterated, and largely unexciting.
PREFUNK: Did someone say Perkins waitress!?!
Sadly, however, the closest Perkins restaurant is in Ellensburg.
In a pinch, though, I hear a Sharis waitress will do - and there's a Sharis at 3902 Bridgeport Way, W.
What!?! What!?! Just sayin'.
See you next week.