HUBBUB >>>

The Hub - Harmon Brewery's popular, bicycle-themed restaurant in the Stadium District -  will sling $3 drinks tonight, beginning at 6 p.m. For those who need specifics: Sex on the Beach, Sex on the Bar, well pours and all Harmon ales.

That's really all I have to say.

LINK: South Sound happy hours

DEAR ASS FACE>>>

You invaded my personal area (house) and took my most prized treasure, my V (Viral connection). So, please, take care of my beloved box (compact hard drive) and love it like I did (at least twice a day). Gleefully make ear love to my mp3 catalogue (2,000 deep), watch and enjoy with your entire body my uploaded collection of every season of Saved By the Bell, and grasp yourself tightly whilst being enraptured by my essays on Kant, Tolstoy, and the exportation of uranium.

One other thing..

Go f**k yourself.

SO... I'M IMMATURE. GET OVER IT. MY MOM DID.>>>

Due to all the crazy ass snow, well, I just got in the mood to spend several hours watching amateur Youtube montages of skiing accidents. Call me what you want, but I don't think there's a person reading this blog that doesn't like a good snow ball to the crotch... Or, you know, watching someone else get one.

So, without further ado, here is an awesome video of people biffing it in the snow. Oh, and I'd like to dedicate this video to my mother, who loves me despite the fact she gave birth to a college graduate who just spent her entire morning watching people getting hit in the nuts.

A MEDLEY OF TASTES AND EXPERIENCES ON SIXTH AVE. >>>

At Pastiche, the newest wine bar to grace Tacoma's bustling Sixth Avenue business district, homemade pasta dishes are on the horizon. Via e-mail, co-owner Art Britton shares that currently Pastiche offers "simple combinations of wine and appetizers that will complement and emphasize certain notes in the wines." For eats, platters of antipasto, vegetables and Seattle's Beecher's Handmade Cheese are offered in addition to hummus, spicy marinara meatballs, bruschetta flat bread, focaccia caprese, fresh green salads, sandwiches and soups. Delectable diet-blowing sweets are imported from Italy and France. According to Britton, popular wines are Baer Winery's Ursa, Goulart Classico Malbec and Cabernet Franc.

Britton and co-owner Linda Gair, both from Gig Harbor, created Pastiche when they couldn't find a comfortable place with wine, food and dancing.

Britton tells us Pastiche is "French for a medley of various fine items and experiences, like music, food and wines." A good time seems unavoidable: sip the wine, savor tasty appetizers and dance to the music in an inviting, old-world-style environment made cozier by a fireplace, vaulted ceiling, tiled bar and upholstered walls.

[Pastiche, 2715 Sixth Ave., Tacoma, 253.572.2277, pasticheawinebar.com]

EDITOR'S NOTE: For the next three weeks the Volcano will have the privilege of corrupting two fresh-faced interns from the Tacoma School of the Arts. The Volcano participates in SOTA's internship program on a yearly basis, and every time we're amazed by the talents and skills the interns come equipped with. Really, it makes us kind of envious. Kids these days are so damn smart ...

Anyway, this year's SOTA interns are Megan Adams and Anne Anderle. Here is the first of many blog posts about the ridiculous stuff we make them do.

Faced with the challenge of spreading the good word about the Volcano's Best of Olympia 2011 issue, we departed with hundreds of fliers, a few newspapers, the mellow tones of The XX and the impeding threat of snow. Despite our misgivings, we hit downtown Olympia like a whirlwind! Racing up and down the streets, leaving fliers in our wake, we covered the whole area in less than an hour.

We found ourselves next at the Eastside Food Co-op, with its friendly people and comforting smell. Since we could not put our beloved fliers inside the store, the employee with the nice green thumb told us kindly to litter outside on the community bulletin board.

Then, in desperate search of a bathroom, we moved onto the Capital Mall where we sneakily spread more fliers as well as taking a graceful and purposeful tour of the perimeter of the building to find our car.

Next we were off to Evergreen State College to hand out our beautiful fliers. We suspected that the Evergreen students could tell we were outsiders by the numerous strange looks we were given. But nonetheless, we did not let it dampen our spirit of spreading the word about the Best of Olympia.

To finish off the day, we went to the Westside Food Co-op where we bought a delicious lunch - by far the best food we have had in our entire lives. Food seems to taste better after a day without it.

Our journey back after lunch was smooth and uneventful, with the exception of the Elvis impersonator whose car read "Honk if you love Elvis!"

Overall, we had a very successful day and managed to spread the word as proud Weekly Volcano interns. 

TODAY IN ONLINE TALK >>>

Today's comment comes from KT, in regard to our late December story on the recently-opened pizza destination in Olympia, Al Forno Ferruzza.

KT says:

"...can absolutely NOT wait a minute longer to try this joint out! I'm coming up on the next PDX-Olympia train, so get the couch ready '-)"

MORE LIVE THAN YOU'LL EVE RBE >>>

4th Ave Ale House Olympia - Downtown. Cody Beebe, The Crooks. 21+. 9 pm.

Hell's Kitchen Tacoma - Downtown. Zael Zura, Looking For Lizards. 21+. 9 pm. $3.

• There's something about a true troubadour - a road-tattered, singer-songwriter that's so basic it almost seems like a necessity. Originally from Coeur d'Alene, Idaho, and complete with the country, rhythm and blues and indie-acoustic leanings you'd expect, Zael Zura is just such a performer. And we're not the only ones to have taken note. KEXP named Zura one of the top 10 singer-songwriters to see live, and Zura's homespun, throwback style has won him fans up and down the West Coast over a 10-year career. Tonight, Zura will be at Hell's Kitchen with Looking for Lizards also on the bill. Chances are, you've got nothing better to do (because this show should be a good - albeit underappreciated - one). Do yourself a favor and see what Zura is about. - Matt Driscoll

Mandolin Cafe Tacoma - Central. Tin Man. All Ages. 7 pm. NC.

Northern Olympia - Downtown. Liz Janes, Greylag, Tattered Dress. All Ages. 8 pm.

• Liz Janes' new album for Asthmatic Kitty, Say Goodbye, is pretty close to flawless. Regardless of whether or not her Starbucks-friendly instincts tickle your earholes, it's hard to deny that her voice is gorgeous and supple, her lyrics insightful (even when they're talking about pixels - seriously! - as on her "__", and the arrangements sublime, thanks in no small part to the contributions of Jason Crane (Rocket From the Crypt) and acclaimed avant-jazz guitarist Chris Schlarb. Say Goodbye is rich in detail and depth, and lives up to the years of creative gestation (which saw Janes migrating from Philadelphia jazz clubs to the wild and wooly world of Olympia noisemakers) that preceded it. It may not be everyone's cup of Tazo Tea, but goes down great regardless. Read up on Greylag here. - Jason Baxter

O'Callahan's Pub & Grill Key Peninsula. Tim Hall Band. 21+. 7 pm. NC.

Rock the Dock Pub & Grill Tacoma - Downtown. Open Mic/Musicians' Night. Hosted by Big D of 9 Pound Hammer. 21+. 9 pm. NC.

The Royal Lounge Olympia - Downtown. Olympia and Seattle Hip-Hop Allstars: Hollywood Kill Krew (oly) Free Whiskey (oly) Double B & Dan Fajans (oly) Night Fox (oly) State Of The Artist SOTA (sea). 21+. 9 pm. $5.

Stonegate Pizza Tacoma - South. Open Jam, with The Billy Roy Danger Trio. 21+. 8 pm.

Tempest Lounge Tacoma - Upper Tacoma. Come Out And Play Open Mic. Hosted by Kim Archer and Nick Sandy. All Ages. 7-10 pm. NC.

Traditions Cafe and World Folk Art Olympia - Downtown. Red Molly. All Ages. 8 pm. $10-$15.

LINK: More Live music tonight in the South Sound

LINK: Subscribe to this blog's RSS feed

THURSDAY, JAN. 13>>>

1. You love grand openings! That's why you're so stoked about the 4 p.m. grand opening of the Milton/Edgewood Pierce Library this afternoon. Opening in the Surprise Lake Square (900 Meridian Ave. E, Suite 29), the event is billed as your first chance to get a library card, check out a book or check your MySpace at the brand-spanking new library. (Technically, we made the bit about MySpace up ...)

2. Greylag AND Liz Janes play tonight at Northern in Olympia. We've covered both acts, and for good reason.

3. Tin Man (or Tinman - we've seen it both ways) will play the Mandolin Café in Tacoma this evening.  An acoustic based singer songwriter, Tin Man started out as a singer in punk bands and over time has evolved into an act fit for the warm, coffee-smelling environment of the Mandolin.

4. The Garfield Book Company Scandinavian Book Club meets at 6:30 p.m. on the second Thursday of every month. Hey! That's today!

5. Sea Marks opens at Olympia Little Theatre today (and runs Thursday - Sunday through Jan. 30). Described as the "humorous, poignant and romantic story of Colin Primrose, a lonely fisherman form the sea bound island of Cliffhorn Heads, Ireland, and Timothea, a lovely young woman from Liverpool, who meets him on a rare visit to the remote island for a relative's wedding," Sea Marks is one of many worthy productions hitting stages this week.

Today, the wonderful world of the Volcano was filled with proofs, pizza, press releases and the awe of watching the newspaper come together for print. While the staff was hustling and bustling, we were given the task of updating the Concert Alert, assuring everyone that the Volcano's list of concerts will be up to date! While this sounds like a simple task, it's much more complicated than you may think. After hours of sorting through a stack of press releases the size of Mt. Everest, the embarrassing side of our music taste started to shine. We now have the desperate urge to go see Ke$ha's Get Sleazy tour, which is, to our dismay, sold out, as well as the Cradle of Filth tour-purely out of curiosity. We'll keep you updated on the progress of our classy music tastes, and the plethora of concerts we're dying to attend.

LINK HUB

LINK: The SOTA Intern Blog - Day One

SLAPPY SCROTUM GAME..IT'S A BALL!>>>

I've said it once and I'll say it again: There is nothing funnier than watching an old man getting hit in the nuts with a football. 

Something that comes close is watching a line of prepubescent boys getting racked in the scrotum as part of a Japanese game show. It was a painful three minutes of video, and I don't even have a pair.