REAL STORIES FROM REAL BARTENDERS >>>

I've been a bartender for a long time. I have met countless freaks, jerks, pervs, sweethearts, rockstars and crazies. Even though it's a physically and mentally exhausting job, these are the colorful people that make it all worthwhile. Well, that and the tips.

I'd like to share with you some of my personal experiences behind the bar, along with the stories from some of my fellow bartenders. Each week - under the clever heading of "Behind Bars" - I will dig into my memory bank - and the incident log books that all bars keep - to bring you some of my favorite stories.

Names of bars, bartenders and patrons have been changed or withheld to protect the innocent.

And the not so innocent.

Cheers!

This week...

DETAILS, DETAILS

Details are very important when describing a patron who has been 86'd.

Whether it's, "he has budding white-kid dreadlocks and wire rim glasses," or "the guy with a thin, creepy mustache and a bad limp," or "she kind of looks like Kathy Bates," these are the types of descriptions bartenders write in log books to let their co-workers know who the trouble makers are, and who is on the "do not serve" list.

Sometimes a drawing is also helpful, and provides a little comic relief - like in this case of an artistic bartender and his jackass patron.

"BEHIND BARS" LINK HUB

LINK: Exotic tastes

LINK: Lactose intoxicated

LINK: Thanks for playing!

LINK: After hours trivia

LINK: Bartending abroad

LINK: Oh puck!

LINK: 86'd

LINK: More Aural Adventures

LINK: Big & Rich

LINK: Tales From the Incident Log Book

LINK: The Tip Jar

LINK: Aural Adventures

LINK: Smooth Transitions

LINK: The Pooper