For a while, it looked like the dumbest thing that might happen in the world of athletics this week would be Scottie Pippen's unfortunate proclamation that, while Michael Jordan might be the best scorer in the history of the NBA, LeBron James might be the best all-time player. The comments, which came May 27 on ESPN's Mike & Mike show, were especially juicy, of course, considering the fact Pippen rode Jordan's coattails to like, a gazillion NBA titles in the ‘90s (technically he was a seven-time All Star, but whatever ... Tony Kukoc was cooler).

You'd think a guy would be grateful. You'd think a former teammate would show Jordan a little respect.

You'd think a former NBA player might be familiar with names like Wilt Chamberlin and Bill Russell.

Then again, Pippen isn't exactly known for his good sense. Mark Riddix of Investopedia, in a story reposted on Yahoo Sports, has reported Pippen "lost $120 million in career earnings due to poor financial planning and bad business ideas," and in his prime "blew $27 million on bad investments and spent $4.3 million on a Gulfstream II corporate jet."

History shows us that looking for good sense from Scottie Pippen is too much to ask.

In fact, we should probably just stop asking him questions all together.

To read this week's full Cup Check column (which, yes, includes the obligatory Jim Tressel references) click here.

WE'RE A BIG BOY NOW >>>

The Weekly Volcano's "personal" Facebook page is closing in on FB's 5,000 friends limit. Holy wow is right. We've started a "fan" page, which will allow us to compile as many friends/fans as technologically possible. If you're on FB and dig the Volcano's posts, quips, discoveries and news breaks – as well as content that doesn't appear either online or in print – go to facebook.com/weeklyvolcanofanpage and please "like" us.

Bonus: To make you really "like" us, we will enter those who "like" us before 5 p.m. Wednesday, June 8 into a random drawing for a free one night stay for two in a King Deluxe Room at the Hotel Murano. You will need to redeem the room before June 30, 2011.

The new Weekly Volcano Facebook page will also be your guide to exclusive Weekly Volcano events, promotions, blogs and photos.

Thank you!

LINK: Like us

GOODNESS IN STORE IN PRINT & ONLINE >>>

Despite the fact we've spent most of the week so far with our tongues hanging out of our mouths, putting together the Sexy Issue that hit streets today, we also (as always!) managed to produce the best music section you'll find in Tacoma, Olympia and all places in between.

Here's a sneak peak at the musical goodness in store in print and online.

UMBER SLEEPING

With James Jenkins of Mama Loves Daddy moving to Portland; the increasing irregularity of Drug Purse and Paris Spleen shows; the switch ideologically and title-wise from the Elephants to the Nightgowns; and with lots of people just getting their shit together - it seems as if the last vestige of the dirtbag, Tacoma-centric, Team Unicorn Records spirit is being maintained by Umber Sleeping. ... - Rev. Adam McKinney

SHAO SOSA

Shao (formerly known as Shaolin) is basically the father of Tri-Cities hip-hop. ... - Josh Rizeberg

THE BILLY NAYER SHOW

American Astronaut is a bizarre new film classic, celebrating American underground rock, made by and starring Cory McAbee and other affiliates of the Billy Nayer Show, which has long stood as a shining example of the collision between alternative rock, filmmaking and performance art. - Rev. AM

OLYMPIA RECORD SHOW

"I think a lot of people are coming back to vinyl because digital downloading has made CDs completely unnecessary, but people still like music in a physical format," says Mike Dixon, the Olympia Record Show's creator. - Nikki Talotta

PLUS: Better Living Through Music - Argonaut, Plateau, NWCZ Anniversary ...

PLUS: Concert Alert - Flaming Lips, Kenny Chesney and more ...

PLUS: Comprehensive Live Local Music Listings

PLUS: Ingenious crap like this

FLETT-RIGGS'S NEW (OLD) DIGS >>>

Tacoma has the divine privilege of welcoming another new comedy club to town.

But there's slightly more to the story ...

Comedian and filmmaker Aaron Flett-Riggs, sans former business partner Adam Norwest, will be bringing comedy back to the former Tacoma Comedy Club locale in Malarkey's on Tacoma Avenue. He'll launch this venture under a new moniker: Grit City Comedy Club. According to Flett-Riggs, staffing issues, a huge overhead, poor acoustics, odd bathroom placement and contract difficulties at the new location of Tacoma Comedy Club simply were not working out for him. As you'll recall, Flett-Riggs and Norwest moved the Tacoma Comedy Club to its current Market Street location in March, with Flett-Riggs telling the Volcano at the time that a lack of size and service concerns were the reason for the move. Norwest will continue to run the Tacoma Comedy Club from its Market Street location without Flett-Riggs.

To read Jackie Fender's full article click here.

[Grit City Comedy Club, Richie Stratton, Friday, June 3, 8:30 p.m., $13, 445 Tacoma Ave. S., Tacoma]

THE LOWDOWN ON WHAT'S UP THIS WEEKEND >>>

WEATHER REPORT

Friday: Mostly sunny, hi 69, lo 48

Saturday: Sunny, hi 76, lo 53

Sunday: Still sunny!, hi 78, lo 53

>>> FRIDAY, JUNE 3: "A PERFECT LIFE" PARTY

Tacoma-loved filmmakers Scott Stone and Joe Rosati are two of the driving forces behind Chad Ruin's A Perfect Life, a film creating an impressive amount of buzz for itself screening at the Seattle True International Film Festival June 7. For Tacomans, there will be a pre-party for the film's STIFF screening Friday, June 3 at Doyle's Public House featuring the bands Looking For Lizards and Ten Miles of Bad Road. With Stone and Rosati having relocated to Park City, Utah, it will also be a chance for old friends to catch up. See our previous coverage of the film here, here and here.

• Doyle's Public House, with Looking For Lizards, Ten Miles of Bad Road, 208 Saint Helens Ave., Tacoma, 253.272.7468

>>> FRIDAY, JUNE 3: NWCZ ANNIVERSARY

The NWCZ podcast -- which recently spawned the beast that is NWCZRadio.com -- is turning two, and to celebrate Darrell Fortune and Co. have the Firwood Rock Lounge, and bands High Noon Horizon, The Hardcount, Quickie and Perry Acker, lined up and ready to go. They've also talked Volcano editor Matt Driscoll into getting on stage, with a mic, and introducing one of the bands. This should be interesting to watch if for no other reason than Driscoll has a history of screwing situations like these up.

• Firwood Rock Lounge, with Perry Acker, High Noon Horizon, the Hardcount, Quickie, 9 p.m., 734 Pacific Ave., Tacoma, 253.212.9717

>>> SATURDAY, JUNE 4: EDDIE SPAGHETTI

Times have changed for Eddie Spaghetti and the Supersuckers. Guitarist Rontrose is gone, as is longtime ‘Sucker Chris Neal. To an outside observer, it might seem like the wheels are finally falling off the "Best Rock Band in the World." Hell, it's about time, right? Wrong. I dare you to say the Supersuckers are on the downhill slide to Eddie Spaghetti, the band's legendary frontman, when he hits Doyle's for a solo  show on Saturday. He'll probably rock your face off - acoustic style. Check that. He'll probably rock your face off acoustic style one way or another; but if you bring up a rumored Supersuckers demise, he'll also probably look at you like you're dumb.

• Doyle's Public House, 9:30 p.m., 208 Saint Helens Ave., Tacoma, 253.272.7468

>>> SATURDAY & SUNDAY: MARITIME GIG FESTIVAL

Nothing says good times like family fun and a whole crapload of pirate references. By the look of things, that's exactly what's in store for those headed to the 2011 Maritime Gig Festival in Gig Harbor. Expect wholesome treats like a fun run, a Kiwanis pancake feed, a "Grand Parade," and what's billed as the "Round Rock Contest." We have no idea what a "Round Rock Contest" is, but it sounds AWESOME! The festival stretches all weekend in downtown Gig Harbor, along Harborview Drive, between Pioneer and Rosedale, and along the waterfront near Jerisich Dock and Skansie Brother's Park. 

• Downtown Gig Harbor, free, all day, gigharborchamber.com
  

>>> WHERE OUR STAFF IS GOING

NIKKI TALOTTA Features Writer
Plenty of bartending and sunshine is in the forecast this weekend. Hope to squeeze in a little Olympia Record Show, too.

.

CHRISTIAN CARVAJAL: Theater Critic
The little lady and I (she loves it when I call her that) are headed out to Ocean Shores for a much deserved honeymoon. I'm looking forward to finally being able to make out with my wife without making the baby Jesus cry.

MATT DRISCOLL: Editor
As mentioned above, I will in fact be stopping by the 2nd Anniversary Party for the NWCZ party on Saturday at the Firwood Rock Lounge (or Furwood Cock Lounge, as my wife has taken to calling it for some reason ...), introducing the band High Noon Horizon at approximately 8:55 p.m. according to the itinerary I've been provided. You don't want to see my rider. It's ridiculous. 

JOANN VARNELL Theater Critic
My weekend will be spent recovering from putting my money where my mouth is. Thursday, 7 p.m., at the Jason Lee auditorium, my students will be presenting eight original short (five min. each) plays. It's free, so if you're inclined . . . 

ALEC CLAYTON Visual Arts Critic
Busy busy weekend for this guy. Friday night, Sweeny Todd at Lakewood Playhouse; Saturday, Play On at Olympia Little Theatre; Sunday, SAGE Brunch (SAGE is the new LGBT senior services agency that was recently founded in Olympia); Sunday night the second and final rehearsal for the reading of The Backside of Nowhere.

JENNIFER JOHNSON Food and Lifestyles Writer 
Friday church dinner then TCC Choir and Orchestra followed by Doyle's for A Perfect Life pre-funk party with Chesty Meow and Stevie D. Saturday daytime I will attempt to finish unpacking and hang some art unless the sun is out and then I'm playing hooky from working and gonna ride my bike till my legs fall off. Saturday night is date night..woot woot! Sunday church service, potluck dinner and fireside with Elder Copeland.

STEVE DUNKELBERGER Meat Market Photographer
Going to A Perfect Life prescreening party at Doyles on Friday and then shooting up the town, photographically speaking, for the boss man when I will be hitting Encore, Hell's Kitchen and the Firwood. Also going to Sweeney Todd at Lakewood with my munchin. Nothing says family time like a musical about a serial killer.

LINK: More arts and entertainment events in the South Sound

ONLINE CHATTER >>>

Today's comment comes from Bard Luippold in regard to our restaurant listing for Sixth Avenue's Old Milwaukee Café & Dessert Co. Find all of our restaurant listings here.

Luippold writes,

Old Milwaukee is my favorite place to get breakfast in Tacoma. They have a great old-time railroad diner vibe, wonderful comfort-food dishes - everything from inventive scrambles to french toast and waffles with seasonal fruit and tons of whipped cream - and very friendly owners/staff who are active in causes like the Breast Cancer Three Day. This is the kind of awesome local business that I love to support. Five Stars!

HAPPY NATIONAL DOUGHNUT DAY! >>>

Many a 9-year-old has read Homer Price, a 1943 book by Robert McCloskey. The most memorable of Homer's adventures is set in his uncle's coffee shop, where a unique machine cranks out doughnuts in full view of the hungry diners. Of course, the customers gobble down the warm confections to excess, and the poor young reader can only imagine how good those fresh doughnuts taste.

Well, dear reader, imagine no more.

Krispy Kreme by the Tacoma Mall sports an amazing doughnut machine.  Rings of yeast-raised dough gently glide into a river of hot vegetable oil, get flipped at precisely the right moment, pass through a glaze waterfall and are placed like jewelry in a display box.

After witnessing this doughnut parade, you may be inclined to blurt out an excessively large order. It is a phenomenon that Krispy Kreme and readers of Homer Price understand all too well. 

Bonus: Today is National Donut Day. Instead of attending your company meeting about changes to your benefits that make no sense on paper, head to Krispy Kreme for a free doughnut. That's right. No coupons. No dog and pony show. Just tell them you want a free doughnut and it's yours.

Krispy Kreme

4302 Tacoma Mall Blvd., Tacoma
253.472-6888

LINK: Another awesome doughnut

FRIDAY, JUNE 3, 2011 >>>

1. At some point on this blog during the last few years, we know we've made mention of this simple (if shameful) fact at least once before: There is nothing so wonderful and so free as riding your bike around this gritty city while shitfaced. Yes, it is irresponsible and it is dangerous. But so is anything else that is part of your birthright of fun. It is with this moral dilemma in mind that we remind the Tacoma MOB Riders host another one of their glorious Bicycle Booze Cruz rides at 7 p.m. in front of the Acme Grub Cage. Titled the "Spring Exposure Ride," these adventurous folks will bicycle hop from bar to bar with the vague notion that this is a game/group hug/whatever. And everyone is invited. Just don't forget to put your kickstand up. Ow.

UPDATE: We apologize, the Roy Rodeo is Saturday and Sunday. 2. The Roy Pioneer Rodeo is not just a rodeo - although it bills its cowboyin' competition as the "Daddy of ‘em all." With the gates opening at 1:30 p.m., the rodeo also features a beer garden, spaghetti feed, homemade bake sale, an Old West town and, at night, concerts.  But ultimately, RPR is the rodeo, complete with hokey jokes - "If Texas is so great, why are Texans always somewhere else?" - and clowns, as well as steer wrestling, barrel racing, saddle-bronc riding, and that PETA favorite, calf roping.

3. Speaking of wrapped up in alcohol fun ... the Washington State History Museum's First Friday Pre-Pub Gallery Talk just so happens to be about the secrets of ancient beer making, as well as other mythological mysteries. Tied to the special exhibition Wrapped! The Search for the Essential Mummy, these 3:30 p.m. gallery talks are led by exhibit curator Stephanie Lile. And the treasure of the tomb? Special deals from fellow beer worshipers: The Harmon and Pyramid Ales.

4. Dare we call it egg-citing news that Evergreen's Riot To Follow Productions is opening Honk: The Ugly Duckling Musical? If they don't quack up, readers will cluck at us for making such a fowl pun. Yet the 1993 British musical update of the Hans Christian Andersen classic is itself undeniably punny. The Olivier-winning musical should prove to be good fodder for Riot To Follow. The play will be staged in The Washington Center's Black Box theater at 7 p.m.

5. Composed for the death of Gabriel Urbain Fauré's parents (his mother died after he had started working on it), Requiem is like a long-spun lullaby, far removed from the terrors of the Berlioz and Verdi Requiems. The Tacoma Community Choir and Orchestra will perform this gentle piece at 7:30 p.m. inside TCC Building 3 Auditorium. Included on the program are two other works, Mozart's Symphony No. 25 in G minor, and Troy Peters' (Tacoma represent!) "Between Hills Briefly Green."

PLUS: A Prefect Life Party and NWCZ Anniversary Bash details in The Weekend Hustle.

LINK: More arts and entertainment events in the South Sound

LINK: Movies open!

Q&A WITH AN ISLAND-THEMED SOUVENIR >>>

Bobble Tiki isn't the first Volcano scribe to spill ink over Death By Steamship. Far from it. In fact, a wet-behind-the-ears Rev. Adam McKinney first introduced the band way back in late 2009, saying the new group was, "bursting with messy exuberance." Death By Steamship had formed in June of that year.

Fast forward to the present, and Death By Steamship preparing for the "official" release of its debut full length. Some things have changed. Some have stayed the same.

Frontman Jason Simplot was kind enough to sit down with Bobble Tiki this week for three questions ...

To read this week's column click here.

[The New Frontier Lounge, Death By Steamship, Tuesday, June 7, 8:30 p.m., Cover TBA, 301 E 25th St., Tacoma, 253.572.4020]

IT HAPPENED IN TACOMA THIS WEEK >>>

It's Friday afternoon, which means it's time for another installment of Zach Powers "Tacoma Week In Review" column. While you have been leaning against your office building with an aluminum reflector soaking in the rays, Powers has been holed up in a dark cave this morning pounding out this fodder so you may have talking points for your bridge game tonight.

This week, Powers touches on the Tacoma-Pierce County Board of Health's ban on e-cigarettes, Tacoma Police's bar blitz Saturday night and awesome East Tacomans. To read Powers' column, click here.