THURSDAY, APRIL 5, 2012 >>>

1. Squeaking. Squawking. Rocking. And rolling. The Squeak and Squawk Music Festival kicks off today in Tacoma full of indie posturing, a dollop of wacky costumes, a healthy dose of experimenting and a heaping helping of tight pants and ironic haircuts. You'll find the back story and full schedule here. One band you won't want to miss is The Back Pockets from Atlanta, Ga. Some 10 or a dozen members fill out the band, including some people seemingly specifically recruited to wear masks and make whooping sounds. The band's music can be poorly encapsulated as art-folk-punk, but the performance adds up to so much more than that. The Wimps and the Cutwinkles join the Back Pockets at 9 p.m. inside The New Frontier Lounge.

2. Democrat Tim Farrell, who represents Tacoma on the Pierce County Council, seeks to change the Pierce County Assessor-Treasurer office by commanding it. On his "Elect Tim Farrell for Pierce County Assessor-Treasurer" website, Farrell list his most important priority if elected to the position, is to "... run a professional office where staff, constituents, and fellow public servants are treated with respect." Hear his plan at 5 p.m. at Amocat Café in downtown Tacoma.

3. As you no doubt heard, and stated several times on the Weekly Volcano's website, the HIDE/SEEK exhibition currently residing at the Tacoma Art Museum is the first major exhibition to explore homosexuality in American art, featuring more than one hundred works spanning from the late 19th century to the 1980s. The exhibit seeks not to offend but rather to explore - and what exploration it offers is surprisingly moving. Wait for it. ... The Tacoma Runners explore the streets and bars of Tacoma every Thursday, and their running attire is often surprisingly moving. Yea, that doesn't make sense. Tacoma Runners will meet at the Tacoma Art Museum at 5 p.m. for a 3-mile jaunt around downtown Tacoma. Afterward, the group will check out HIDE/SEEK and have some drinks. There.

4. For baseball fans looking for that small town community feeling that minor league baseball exudes, the Tacoma Rainiers are ready to provide another season of wholesome family entertainment. The Rainiers, the Seattle Mariners' AAA affiliate, kick off their 2012 campaign with the club's home opener at 7:05 p.m. against the Salt Lake Bees. In celebration of the season opener, beers will be $2.

5. The McKassons are way more talented than your family. Brother and sister Ryan and Cali McKasson put their Celtic/Scottish magic on full display every time their feet touch the stage, especially when Ryan's wife Brooke McKasson and Cali's husband Matt Jerrell join the band. Tonight at 8 p.m. Ryan escapes the family for a show at the Lakewood Playhouse. Dig fiddle? Get there.

LINK: More arts and entertainment events in the South Sound

LINK: Live music and DJs in the South Sound

LINK: South Sound happy hours

WHAT WE HAVE FOUND TODAY >>>

Occupy Tacoma: Where are they now? (Weekly Volcano)

Jeff Kingsbury: The Capital Playhouse founder has stirred things up. (Weekly Volcano)

McCarver Elementary: Creative collaboration continues fight for equality. (Weekly Volcano)

ASB Ass: Bonney Lake football coach quits after being busted for stealing from the school. (News Tribune)

Today In Dumbass Drivers: Dude cuts off Washington State tropper trying to get to HOV with his inflatable doll. (News Tribune)

Veterans Against Lariam: Lakewood man not shocked that the anti-malarial drug Lariam could be linked to the recent afghan massacre. (Daily Weekly)

Syian Government: It says it's pulling some troops out response to former U.N. Secretary-General Kofi Annan's peace plan. (CNN)

Peabody Awards: Congrats to TED, American Experience, The Colbert Report, StoryCorps, Portlandia and others ... (Peabody)

Not Good: Kristen Wiig, Jason Sudeikis and Andy Samberg rumored to be leaving SNL. (My Daily News)

Why Can't This Happen To Us?: Man buys a Warhol for $5. (Spinner)

Just In Case The Force Is With You: Star Wars condoms. (Dvice)

Too Much Free Time: This family decorated 10,000 Easter eggs. (The Daily What)

Fashion: Your heartbeat changes it. (Animal New York)

Put A Little Skip In Your Step Today

IT HAPPENED SATURDAY IN LAKEWOOD >>>

As if you all didn't already know, I'm incapable of doing two things at once.  That is, with the exception of drinking a cold tallboy while inconspicuously checking out a guy's ass, but that's about all I'm good at doing simultaneously (wink, wink).

A prime example might be this past weekend at the Dockyard Derby Dames Season 6 opening bout.  It was my debut as an announcer for the DyDD bouts and Holy Toledo, Batman - I was excited!

So excited, in fact, that I hardly paid attention to the bouts.

I mean, at first I tried to jot down the dynamics of the first two jams between The Trampires and Marauding Mollys, but after the initial sounds of hearing my own voice on the loud speaker I was hooked.

Co-announcers Phil Dirt and James T. Jerk assigned me to be a part of the crowd and it was my duty to interact and infiltrate whatever information I could get from spectators.  Every other jam, which is approximately every 5 minutes, the dynamic duo would throw my name out there and ask what I was up to.

Naturally, I had a load of fun interacting with the standing room only crowd that packed the Pierce College Health Ed Center this past Saturday night.

The Weekly Volcano Hot Spot located inside the beer garden had injured Femme Fianna, men leaving for Afghanistan, and one of my favorite Femme Fianna OG's, Louda Than Bombs.

Throughout the night I rubbed elbows with the boyfriend of Weekly Volcano's sexiest athlete (Hit O' Honey) and his friend in a purple spandex full-body suit.  I even made him knock on his penis area to prove he was wearing a cup. 

You see, I was way too busy taking care of very important cup checks and simply could not administer any sort of focus on the Dockyard Derby Dame bout before me.

For this, my dear roller derby fans, I apologize.

I will, however, recap for you the fact that the sound system went out before the first bout began resulting in the National Anthem being sang a cappella (and without speakers) by the talented Harm A. Knee of Hellbound Homewreckers.

Twiggie Smalls surprised the crowd with an impromptu wedding ceremony involving her fiancé, The Henchman. They were both on skates. (Go figure.)

Marauding Mollys definitely got the award for largest fan attendance with Hellbound Homewreckers coming in a close second.

Femme Fianna skated their hearts out with a completely new team. That's right: Fresh Meat.

In the end, one thing I can tell you is that I had a blast getting to know everyone in the crowd and plugging my favorite alternative newsweekly, Weekly Volcano.

If only I could do both things at once.  Le sigh.

Anyway, here are the final scores:

Bout 1:

The Trampires - 147

Marauding Mollys - 222

Bout 2:

Femme Fianna - 76

Hellbound Homewreckers - 229

LINK: More photos from Dockyard Derby Dames Season 6 opener

THE LOWDOWN ON WHAT'S UP THIS WEEKEND >>>

WEATHER REPORT

Friday: Rain showers, hi 52, lo 34(!)

Saturday: Partly cloudy, hi 64, lo 41

Sunday: Overcast awfulness, hi 64, lo 43

>>> FRIDAY, APRIL 6: Frost Park Chalk Off Challenge

If you think sidewalk chalk is only good for hopscotch, you've got another think coming. Tomorrow, thousands of South Sound artists will descend upon Frost Park in downtown Tacoma at noon, turning its concrete into canvas for the opening of Frost Park Chalk Off Challenge Season 5ive at Ninth and Pacific Avenue. Witness unbelievable feats of illustration, and create some of your own. Be a part of history as Mayor Marilyn Strickland has proclaimed April 6, 2012 as "Frost Park Chalk Day." Rejoice in the movement initially started as a way for the community to positively "occupy" Larry Frost Memorial Park during their lunch hour every Friday - at least during the warm(ish) spring and summer months. Then vote for your favorite chalk art through online voting on FeedTacoma.com.

• Frost Park, noon to 1 p.m., bring a sack lunch, feed a cupcake to a chalker, Ninth and Pacific Ave., Tacoma

>>> FRIDAY, APRIL 6: Adult Flashlight Egg Hunt

Egg-citing times at night: Certain traditions adapt themselves as time travels on. Take the Easter egg hunt. It was fun when you were a kid - watching your parents crawl around, trying to hide a bright pink egg behind a sprinkler head. And there was always the added joy of finding one (hopefully unbroken) three months later. But now you're a parent, and well, it's lost its charm. Or has it? The lovely folks at the Lacey Parks and Recreation host an Adult Flashlight Egg Hunt Friday night. You can now have an egg-ceptional (no, really, ceptions of eggs) time hunting for the eggs hidden on the Regional Athelitc Complex ball fields. Maybe someone will even paint your face.

• Regional Athletic Complex, 9 p.m., $5, 8345 Steilacoom Rd. SE, Olympia, 360.491.0857

>>> SATURDAY, APRIL 7: Community Art Day

Tacoma is a living, breathing example of the powerful positive impact art can have on a community. So it's not surprising to see Saturday bringing an event at Tacoma Art Place simply known as Community Art Day. And the title pretty much says it all. Expect workshops, demonstrations and family fun all day, and all for free. A huge raffle will be part of this year's Community Art Day. For $10 each, you could win a two-night stay with breakfast in the Waddell Spa Suites at Courtyard by Marriott, three-course dinner for two at Pacific Grill, a Rasul Mud Chamber treatment at Clara Spa Salon & Studios or Republic of 253 gift certificates. These staycation goodies hit the $1,000 mark in value. Grab raffle tickets now at Tacoma Art Place.

• Tacoma Art Place, 10 a.m. to 6 p.m., free, 1116 S. 11th St., Tacoma, 253.238.1006

>>> SATURDAY, APRIL 7: Eddie Spaghetti

Campy, sarcastic, and sleazy, the Supersuckers offer a mix of rockabilly flavored garage rock. With sex, drugs and Satan as its mantras, the band's lyrics are an uproarious celebration of all of the wickedness habitually associated with rock ‘n' roll - namely sex, drugs and Satan. Motorhead's Lemmy once said, "If you don't like the Supersuckers, you don't like rock & roll." It's safe to say the same applies to Eddie Spaghetti, who, when not leading the Seattle-based rawkers, unleashes solo material for those tired of passionate unplugged anthems for the masses.

• Hell's Kitchen, with Stone Evergreen Travellers, Swampy Draws and guests, 9 p.m., $6-$8, 928 Pacific Ave., Tacoma, 253.759.6003

>>> SUNDAY, APRIL 8: Tacoma Cult Movie Club

Hard to believe that the Tacoma Cult Movie Club has flipped on the projector for three years! But it has, and hosts Rev. Colin, Tobin Ropes and Holland Hume will throw a party Sunday at The Acme Grub Cage - the movie club's ultra-appropriate home. Its membership of deviants, freaks, weirdoes and misfits invite the public to watch the greatest films screened that were, for the most part, overlooked this past year. "Movies with a low attendance or films that simply didn't get the love they deserved," says Rev. Colin. Admission and popcorn are free, as always. In tradition of previous anniversary parties, there will be a potluck for anyone interested. "Please only partake if you participate," says Rev. Colin. "That's how we do it in the good old T-Stank."

• The Acme Grub Cage, 4 p.m., no cover, 1310 Tacoma Ave. S., Tacoma, 253.272.1892

WHAT SOME OF OUR STAFF MEMBERS ARE UP TO

CHRISTIAN CARVAJAL Theater Critic
My wife read my plug for the Lacey Adult Easter Egg Hunt (in Nerd Alert) and decided it sounded like fun, so we'll be there. We also have a big Easter dinner with family, plus rehearsals for La Traviata, coming April 28.

REV. ADAM MCKINNEY Music writer
I will be spending the next five days seeing more than 30 amazing bands at the Squeak and Squawk Music Festival. It's been a labor of love for the past six months of my life, and I am thrilled and frightened to see it finally come to fruition. For more information (shameless plug!), please visit squeakandsquawk.tumblr.com. SQSQ For Life!

ALEC CLAYTON Arts Critic
I'll be seeing two art exhibits Saturday to review them my Visual Edge column. I'll be visiting "Creatures of Habit: Contemporary Ceramics" at Fulcrum and the new Iota Gallery in the Jet Building on 19th and Jefferson to see works by Portland artist Susan Cowan.

JENNI PRANGE BORAN Arts and Feature Writer
Saturday will be spent buying candy, then waiting for the child to go to bed so husband and I can fill plastic eggs with said candy. Sunday will be spent hiding eggs, watching child find eggs, then eating ham with family members.  Then Squeak and Squawk – Oberhofer, Pond and Wheelies at the Space,6 p.m.!

NIKKI TALOTTA Music Writer
Besides the usual drink pouring and weirdo watching at the bar, this weekend also includes gardening and Easter egg hunts with the kidlets. The in-laws will also make way too much ham and buy way too much candy in order to send us home with two weeks of Easter goodies. I'm prepping my stomach now.

JOANN VARNELL Theater Critic
After a whirlwind spring break trip to Colorado and South Dakota, we will be flying into SeaTac on Friday (which happens to be my husband's birthday). We have a sitter and will be celebrating at the Top of Tacoma. I'll do laundry on Saturday and the whole family will go to church on Easter Sunday.

MOLLY GILMORE Arts and Feature Writer
Catching up on work and likely going to see Animal Farm, in its final weekend at Olympia Family Theater.

JOSH RIZEBERG Music Columnist
Friday I'm hosting Awall A.K.A. 2-Piece & Boombox Massacre's album-release show for BoomMan & Mobbin' at Hell's Kitchen, 9 p.m. There is performances from Cedric the Great, The Gonzo Family, The Koomaniacs, Un Da Rhyme Hustla, Chris Crayzie, and Bo$$ Fam' Officials. I predict it will be the show of the year. Saturday at 1 p.m., I'll be going back to Hell's Kitchen to watch the all-ages Alliance Battle League Battles. It's $5 to get in. This is the first week the League has been at Hell's Kitchen. They outgrew there last-spot at Rum Runners on South Tacoma Way. Come check-out these young-artists and there movement. Sunday I'm resting with My Family!

NICK LEONARD Music writer
Thursday night my group Free Whiskey will be playing The Royal for our last Olympia show for awhile. Friday and Saturday I will be spending in Seattle doing a whole lot of nothing ... and drinking

LINK: Even more local events that we recommend

LINK: Comprehensive South Sound Arts & Entertainment Calendar

WHAT WE HAVE FOUND TODAY >>>

Big House On Campus: State House Democrats approved a $31.1 billion supplemental budget that avoids new cuts to K-12 schools or universities. The 54-43 vote went along party lines. (News Tribune)

Wacko From WACO: Robin Ann Chase, 44, was busted for stealing more than $73,000 from her former employer, the Olympia-based Washington Association of County Officials. (News Tribune)

State Supreme Court: It ruled warrantless searches violated Slippery Snapp's right to drive other people's identities around town under the state constitution. (News Tribune)

Washington State Lieutenant Governor Candidate Bill Finkbeiner: He wants Olympia lawmakers to ditch current seating practices and intermingle "We Are The World" style, if not alphabetical. (Daily Weekly)

Ghost Ship: No word if it was those pesky kids in the Mystery Machine van that tipped the U.S. Coast Guard, but a ghost ship set a sail during the Japanese tsunami was sunk due to the possible dangers that comes with unmanned ships floating around. (CNN)

U.S. Economy: The United States economy added a relatively weak 120,000 jobs in March, compared with 240,000 in February. (The New York Times)

Dating Advice From Charles Dickens: A "Manly Young Lady" and a "Poetical Young Gentleman" walk into a bar. (Brain Pickings)

Too Much?: Bacon taco shell. (Obvious Winner)

Walking Dead Mad Men: One awesome zombie ad agency mashup. (Huffington Post)

Some dogs Tryin' To Get Their Thuggish Ruggish Bones

FRIDAY, APRIL 6, 2012 >>>

1. How have you aged? Are there wrinkles and scars and flab and sag? Do you have stretch marks, age spots, bone spurs, droopy kneecaps and giant moles? Do you wish you could walk into a giant Photoshop Booth and come out the other side with an ass lift and the gray nose hairs gone? Yes, us too. Phoenix sculptor Jane Kelsey-Mapel and Tacoma painter Becky Frehse have joined artistic forces to the explore themes of aging and re-interpretation through ceramic sculpture, painting and assemblage constructions in their show ReConfigured, which opens Friday, April 6 at Gallery 301 by the Tacoma Dome. According to press release hype, the two artist, "will exhibit assemblage sculptures which reflect the duality inherent in their collaboration process as well as the metaphorical notion of ‘reinventing"' or ‘repurposing' one's identity at various states of the aging process." The reception runs 5-9 p.m.

2. The Grand Cinema reaches the big 15 officially on April 18, and with such a milestone approaching The Grand can think of no better present for its approaching celebration than your presence. The non-profit theater offers a different deal during each of the 15 days leading up to the big date. Today, The Grand offers free upgrades in concessions for any soda or popcorn - i.e. One medium popcorn for the price of a small popcorn.

3. Thousands of South Sound artists will descend upon Frost Park in downtown Tacoma at noon, turning its concrete into canvas for the opening of Frost Park Chalk Off Challenge Season 5ive at Ninth and Pacific Avenue. Be a part of history as Mayor Marilyn Strickland has proclaimed April 6, 2012 as "Frost Park Chalk Day." Remember to vote for your favorite chalk art through online voting on FeedTacoma.com.

4. Hell's Belles, Zero Down and Resident Kings rock the Capitol Theater beginning at 7:30 p.m.

5. The lovely folks at the Lacey Parks and Recreation host an Adult Flashlight Egg Hunt at 9 p.m. You can now have an egg-ceptional (no, really, ceptions of eggs) time hunting for the eggs hidden on the Regional Athelitc Complex ball fields.

LINK: More arts and entertainment events in the South Sound

LINK: Live music and DJs in the South Sound

LINK: South Sound happy hours

HURRY! >>>

If cooking for Easter isn't your thing (and let's face, it, who wants to do all those dishes), there are plenty of great Easter brunch options in the South Sound.

Stanley and Seafort's (115 E. 34th St., Tacoma) has a special brunch menu featuring a breakfast Wellington, smoked salmon Benedict, prime rib and scrambled eggs, special cocktails and more from 9 a.m. Call for reservations 253.473.7300. 

Primo Grill (601 S. Pine St. #102, Tacoma) will be featuring eggs Benedict, a smoked salmon frittata, crab cakes, shrimp cocktail and more. Call for reservations 253.383.7000.

Asado (2810 Sixth Ave., Tacoma) has a special Easter brunch planned from 10 a.m. to 3 p.m. Call for reservations 253.272.7770.

Windmill Bistro (16009 60th St. E., Sumner) will have crab cake Benedict, green eggs and ham, French toast, steak and eggs and more from 8:30 a.m. to 3 p.m. Call for reservations 253.826.7897.

The Heritage Restaurant at the Inn at Gig Harbor (3211 56th St. NW, Gig Harbor) will have a plated Easter brunch, with maple glazed ham, lobster crab cakes Benedict, cinnamon French toast, roasted wild sockeye salmon and more. Call for reservations 253.858.1111.

Adriatic Grill (4201 S. Steele St., Tacoma) will be having a special "lunch brunch menu" from 10:30 a.m. to 4 p.m., and then dinner specials after 4 p.m.  Call for reservations 253.475.6000.

Pacific Grill (1502 Pacific Ave., Tacoma) has a special buffet featuring prime rib, glazed ham, French toast, special desserts and more. Call for reservations 253.627.3535.

Anthony's Hearthfire Grill (1675 Marine Dr. NE, Olympia) has brunch specials such as a Hearthfire breakfast scramble, French toast, quiche and Snake River Farms steak and eggs. 10 a.m. to 3 p.m. Call for reservations 360.705.3473.

Lobster Shop at Dash Point (6912 Soundview Dr. NE, Tacoma) has a special buffet all day, featuring prime rib, ham, Dungeness crab legs, shrimp, oysters and more. Call for reservations 253. 759.2165.

Green.House (4793 Pt. Fosdick Dr. NW, Gig Harbor) will be featuring a special breakfast menu with their lunch menu, including eggs Benedict, a Western and Denver omelet, buttermilk pancakes, cinnamon French toast and more. Call for reservations 253.514.6482.

LINK: South Sound Restaurant Guide

REAL STORIES FROM REAL BARTENDERS >>>

I've been a bartender for a long time. I have met countless freaks, jerks, pervs, sweethearts, rockstars and crazies. Even though it's a physically and mentally exhausting job, these are the colorful people that make it all worthwhile. Well, that and the tips.

I'd like to share with you some of my personal experiences behind the bar, along with the stories from some of my fellow bartenders. Each week - under the clever heading of "Behind Bars" - I will dig into my memory bank - and the incident log books that all bars keep - to bring you some of my favorite stories.

Names of bars, bartenders and patrons have been changed or withheld to protect the innocent.

And the not so innocent.

Cheers!

This week...

Thank god bars don't have fluorescent lighting. Every bump and blemish and wrinkle would be on display, making people have to drink even more to achieve "beer goggles."

A little mood lighting helps the atmosphere of any bar. It makes things softer and sexier. We have these really great lamps at the bar where I work. They are vintage and classy and provide just the right ambience.

People love them.

They always ask if they are for sale, or where they can get them. And, sometimes, they love them so much, they try to steal them.

Here's a story of one such individual.

Caught in the Act, Part 2

"The Lamp Lifter"

It was a recent closing on a typical Thursday night. People were shuffling out of the bar, lighting smokes and exchanging numbers, when one of the regulars started hollering about a lamp thief. Immediately, another regular and I sprung into action.

"Where is the bastard?" I demanded.

By this time, a crowd had gathered.

"That way!" They all replied.

My sidekick and I quickly sprinted in the direction of the perpetrator, my bar towel flapping in the wind. We could see him and his culprit counter-part ahead - just near the bus station. He still had the lamp under his coat.

"Give up the goods," I said, hands on hips.

"Yeah, Jerk," said my sidekick.

The man sheepishly returned the lamp. He mumbled something about being sorry and drunk and walked away, tail between his legs.

We returned to the bar, lamp raised overhead. The crowd cheered.

As I locked up for the night, all I could think was that shot of adrenalin was just what I needed to get through the last of the cleaning. That, and "what a dumb ass."

Check back next week for a story of a lamp lifter who was caught in the act - only this one wasn't so apologetic.

In the meantime, Cheers!

LINK: Caught in the Act, Part 1 

LINK: Past Behind Bars columns

LIVE MUSIC TONIGHT IN THE SOUTH SOUND >>>

Capitol Theater Olympia - Downtown. Hell's Belles (all-female AC/DC tribute), Zero Down, Resident Kings. All Ages. 7:30 pm. $10-$15.

• For 12 years, Hell's Belles have been belting out the timeless classics of AC/DC. All the raunch and flair and sexiness of Angus Young and the rest of AC/DC are channeled beautifully through the five females of Hell's Belles. Every throaty lyric and bass line and rock stance is performed with the energy and exuberance of professionals. These women truly love what they do and it shows. They have not only partied with members of their idol band - but have toured extensively across the globe. Luckily for the Puget Sound, they will be making a stop at Olympia's Capitol Theater. The hype on Capitol Theater's web page reads, "There's not a HELL'S BELLES audience that hasn't been blown away by the raw power, attention to AC/DC details, and undeniable appeal that these belles deliver with undying devotion....It's an all out rock-n-roll assault that leaves you both satisfied and begging for more." - Nikki Talotta

Forza Coffee Fircrest. The Kari Ehli Band. 5-8 pm. Tin Man. 8 pm.

Hell's Kitchen Tacoma - Downtown. Like Lepers, Few Words For Comfort, Seeya, Space Bandit, To Die For. All Ages. 5 pm. $6-$10. Boomman & Mobbin CD Release Show. 9:30 pm. NC.

Jazzbones Tacoma - Sixth Avenue. Midnight Salvage Co. CD Release Party with James Coates, China Davis. 7:30 pm. $6-$8.

Louie G's Pizzeria Fife. Silver Dollar Circus, Cell Phone Parking Lot. All Ages. 9 pm.

Mandolin Cafe Tacoma - Central. Moss Brothers. All Ages. 6 pm.

Maxwell's Restaurant and Lounge Tacoma - Downtown. Lance Buller Trio. 7 pm.

The New Frontier Lounge Tacoma - Dome District. Squeak and Squawk Music Festival featuring Derek Kelley and the Speedwobbles, The Sivas, The Riffbrokers. 9 pm. $5-$7.

• Sure, the Mayans had a lot to say about 2012, but one thing they forgot to mention was that it would reckon the return of Tacoma's Squeak and Squawk Music Festival, running April 5-9. When Squeak and Squawk originator Sean Alexander left Tacoma for New York, this third installment went through a spin-the-bottle style search for the right person to helm the ship, landing on Jena Stedtler, who was soon joined by the Weekly Volcano's own Rev. Adam McKinney. Read Jenni Prange Boran's full feature on the Squeak and Squawk Music Festival in the Music section at weeklyvolcano.com.

The Royal Lounge Olympia - Downtown. Crack Sabbath. 8 pm. $5-$10.

• Andy Geertson, who Volcano readers voted the best bartender in Olympia, has branched out his music booking skills, creating Andyinoly Productions. This weekend, he presents, along with the Royal Lounge, jazz music moguls Crack Sabbath. Smooth, powerful, emotional, these are just a few words that come to mind when listening to this unique band. WTF, no way, and really?! Also come to mind when I realize that these guys, who have graced the stage with Les Claypool and Wolves in The Throne Room, also pull off cover songs from James Brown and Nirvana, with a freshness and style that only a jazz band with the name Crack Sabbath can. Says Geertson, "Crack Sabbath is comprised of some of the best well established jazz musicians in Seattle ... a song will seamlessly go from a flawlessly flowing jazz tune into a full blown heavy metal grind ... see them once and you're hooked." – NT
  

The Space Tacoma - Triangle District. Squeak and Squawk Music Festival featuring Santee, Webelos, A Leaf, I Low. All Ages. 6 pm. $5-$7. Read Jenni Prange Boran's full feature on the Squeak and Squawk Music Festival in the Music section at weeklyvolcano.com.

Stonegate Pizza Tacoma - South. Jerry Miller Jam. 9 pm. NC.

Tempest Lounge Tacoma - Upper Tacoma. Rafael Tranquilino, Farko Dozumov. 7:30 pm. NC.

Traditions Cafe and World Folk Art Olympia - Downtown. The Honey Dewdrops. All Ages. 8 pm. $10-$15.

LINK: More live music tonight in the South Sound

SATURDAY, APRIL 7, 2012 >>>

1. The Museum of Glass presents Scapes, a new exhibition of work created by siblings Laura de Santillana and Alessandro Diaz de Santillana and executed in the Museum of Glass Hot Shop during two Visiting Artist residencies in 2010.  The four room-based exhibition - inspired by the Hindu belief that the world is a series of disks made up of wind, water and earth, upon which float four continents in a vast circular ocean - will open in the Museum's North Gallery today at 10 a.m. and remain on view through January 2013. 

2. Tacoma is a living, breathing example of the powerful positive impact art can have on a community. So it's not surprising to see today bringing an event at Tacoma Art Place simply known as Community Art Day from 10 a.m. to 6 p.m. And the title pretty much says it all. Expect workshops, demonstrations and family fun all day, and all for free. A huge raffle will be part of this year's Community Art Day. For $10 each, you could win a two-night stay with breakfast in the Waddell Spa Suites at Courtyard by Marriott, three-course dinner for two at Pacific Grill, a Rasul Mud Chamber treatment at Clara Spa Salon & Studios or Republic of 253 gift certificates. These staycation goodies hit the $1,000 mark in value.

3. You might think swinging and flipping over high bars and prancing on two-inch-wide beams are skills only Olympic athletes like Mary Lou Retton can pull off with any degree of grace.  But the performers of the Jordan World Circus have mastered those gymnastic feats, and much more. Their show is full of extremely flexible performers who could wow even the most jaded Olympian. Where else can you watch men your dad's age twist their bodies into pretzel shapes? Marvel at the exotic animals, clap and rub your tummy simultaneously over the incredible balancing feats by Deiter Galambos, gasp in awe at the Dangerzone Rider in the globe of death, and be deeply, deeply frightened by the clowns at 11 a.m., 3 and 7 p.m. at the Puyallup Fairgrounds.

4. Happy National Beer Day! The Harmon Tap Room will be hosting an all day event celebrating said day with door prizes and giveaways, a cool / crazy / interesting hat contest, $3 pints all day, a special food menu and the debut of its spring seasonal Rajahs Royal IPA on draft and on cask. Harmon brewers will hang from noon to 3 p.m.

5. Swing Cafe & Wine Bar hosts guitarist Vince Brown and renowned gypsy jazz violinist Michael Gray from 9-11 p.m. Gray has performed at concerts and festivals around the world with Pearl Django and a recent stint at Seattle's Jazz Alley with master guitarist Martin Taylor. 

PLUS: More event suggestions in our Weekend Hustle

LINK: More arts and entertainment events in the South Sound

LINK: Live music and DJs in the South Sound

LINK: South Sound happy hours