CAKE AND ART FOR GOOD >>>

To celebrate and honor the Pierce County AIDS Foundation's 25 years of service, South Sound artists created pieces in every medium - mixed media, pen and ink, acrylics, charcoal, and more - with one common thread: the red AIDS awareness ribbon is woven into the artwork either literally or symbolically.

Ten selected pieces are currently on display at Corina Bakery and will remain up until Nov. 30. On Dec. 1, the art will be sold via silent auction at the Tacoma Art Museum on World AIDS Day.

So scope out your piece and get ready to bid, yo.

Coinciding with Thursday's Art Walk, Corina Bakery will host Art for AIDS 5-7 p.m. Thursday, Nov. 15. During the event, attendees can meet the artists of the 10 selected pieces and hob nob over light refreshments.

The 10 artists in attendance and their media are: Patrushka (gouache on wood); Jennifer Preston Chushcoff (mixed media encaustic), Cheri O'Brien (gouache on watercolor paper), Megan Johnson (mixed media), Kathryn Anderson (acrylic on canvas), Roland Hamel & Elena Hamel (text with pen and ink), Savy Jane (acrylic and charcoal), Barbra Anderson (watercolor paint and pencil), Malinda Ayers (acrylic), and Susan Russell Hall (mixed media).

Most of the artists are local or have ties to the Tacoma or Northwest community.

You can go look up what gouache is now. No one is looking.

CORINA BAKERY, THURSDAY, NOV. 15, 5-7 P.M., 602 FAWCETT AVE., TACOMA, 253.627.5070

LISTENING TO MUSIC IN A CAVE >>>

With the holiday season approaching, college kids like me begin to panic. Do we save our money for gift and travel, or do we blow it on nightlife and concerts?

Thankfully, the government provides resources for such situations.

Pacific Lutheran University's Student Government has secured the Seattle band Hey Marseilles for a free concert tonight in The Cave, located in the basement of the Anderson University Center. PLU's Student Government, or ASPLU, is awesome. It produces free shows throughout the year that are open to both PLU students and the rest of the world. Past ASPLU concerts have featured Macklemore, Allen Stone, The Lonely Forest, Eric Hutchinson, among countless other local artists.

Matt Bishop and Nick Ward founded Hey Marseilles in 2006 while studying at the University of Washington. After the band released its debut album in 2008, national success followed in the form festival headlines and radio airtime.

Listening to Hey Marseilles's music is like creating glittery crafts with close friends, although its melodic folk music does incite dance situations.

The band describes their sound as "folkestral" and claims it is like "an indie rocker reminiscing on their grandparent's first kiss." Mandolin, viola, accordion, drumbourine, and other unique instruments give the band it's dynamic sound. Many times instruments outnumber musicians on stage at a Hey Marseilles show.

The band recently returned from a national tour opening for Sea Wolf. It has its sights set on March for the release of its next album.

Opening for Hey Marseilles tonight is the PLU student band House Cats, which leaped into action after founder and PLU sophomore Jakob Maier won the university's Battle of the Bands in 2012. This victory lead to a featured slot at PLU's annual music festival, LollaPLUza. House Cats also has a love affair with multiple instruments, including a brass and string section and multiple vocalists.

THE CAVE, THURSDAY, NOV. 15, 8 PM., NO COVER, ANDERSON UNIVERSITY CENTER, 12180 PARK AVE. S., TACOMA, 253.535.7480

LINK: ASPLU upcoming concert

REVIEW OF HUMP! FILM FESTIVAL >>>

If there's any lingering doubt about the mainstreaming of porn, even low-fi amateur porn, reflect that it launched the highly lucrative careers of a whole coven of Kardashians. We love porn. So while there were some timid faces in the crowd at Olympia's first-ever screening of Hump! last night, there was also an electric, anticipatory vibe. Whatever your taste, there's little chance you were disappointed.

The Hump! anthology of locally-made porn is the brainchild (loinchild?) of Dan Savage, editorial director of The Stranger, author of the syndicated advice column Savage Love, and spiritual leader of the anti-bullying "It Gets Better" project. Hump!'s rules are straightforward: no critters, no minors, no messy bathroom stuff. This leaves a wide-open field for creative expression - so wide, in fact, that it'll be difficult to describe the shorts without transgressing my editor's liberal subject policy. (Heh. I said "shorts.") Let's put it this way: I counted five different bodily fluids, plus a dollop of axle grease.

The first of no less than 27 flicks was a cartoon, Rumpy Pumpy, in which the phrase popularized by Roger Ebert is used to describe a parade of cartoon phalli and clams. (I'm referring to the bivalve. I swear!) What followed was a mixed bag of production values, narrative intents and proclivities. Whatever you're into, there was something to turn you on. There was also something to turn you waaaayyy the hell off. I'm looking at you, Mansmash! ... but only from the corner of my eye. Yikes!

To vote for best in show is to summarize one's sexual preferences. With that in mind, my choice was the very funny Magic Love, in which a straight couple (and, if memory serves, an extremely close friend) is stop-motion animated through a series of good-natured liaisons. I specify straight because gay content was represented in bacchanalian abundance. If that's a problem for you, Hump! will never be your cup of tea. If, however, you want to watch a dominatrix force two Rubenesque young women to eat meringue pies, your desires will be met.

I, on the other hand, preferred Dungeons & Dragons Orgy, in which rolls of a 20-sided die determine who'll pair up (or triple up) with whom. Then there's Dueling Dames, in which two bored women vie for the title of sexual champion, all in the style of a vintage silent movie. The encounter of Alice and Miles is as sultry and polished as a Shakira video. Speaking of which, the program concludes with a music video, the parodic Boyfriend, and it also features a rendition of Peter and the Wolf that'd give Prokofiev the screaming fantods.

I'd be remiss if I didn't praise the surprisingly affecting and empowering Krutch, in which a young woman with a disability entertains herself using one of her crutches. This activity is jarringly intercut with her struggle to get to a bus before it pulls away from the curb. Work like this gives the lie to the narrow-minded notion that all porn is antifeminist or otherwise diminishing. Emcee Lindy West suggests Hump will return to Olympia next year. Judging by last night's audience packed with flushed and appreciative spectators, I suspect they'll be deluged with Thurston county contest submissions.

I know. I said "submissions." Would "entries" have been any better?

CAPITOL THEATER, OLYMPIA FILM FESTIVAL, THROUGH SUNDAY, NOV. 18, $4-$10, 206 FIFTH AVE. SE, OLYMPIA, 360.754.6670

LINK: Olympia Film Festival schedule

LIVE MUSIC TONIGHT IN THE SOUTH SOUND >>>

Dawson's Bar and Grill Tacoma - South. Billy Shew Band Open Jam Session. 8 pm. NC.

The Deltan Club Tacoma - Downtown. The Knux, The Breaklites, Thunders of Wrath. Bar with ID. All Ages. 8 pm. $5.

Eastside Club Tavern Olympia - Downtown. Elbow Coulee, The Jeff Campbell Band, AKA & The Heart Hurt Goods. 9 pm. $3.

• Thursday night AKA and the Heart Hurt Goods will play its first show at one of Olympia's favorite venues, the Eastside Club, where dreadlocks, mohawks and ponytails all bob and weave through the dance floor to some of the regions best bands. AKA and the Heart Hurt Goods join the club with their fresh style of performance hip-hop. With a new CD under their belt, (release party coming soon!) the group is riding high on a wave of energy, bringing messages of love, both lighthearted and deep-seeded. The band has good looking merchandise, too. "We're very excited about playing at the Eastside," says Mark Bowen, AKA. "There is a large constituent of people that only go to the Eastside because they love really good beers, so go there we must. It's one of the last remaining venues in town we haven't got to rock yet." — Nikki McCoy
  

The New Frontier Lounge Tacoma - Dome District. Word 3rd Thursday featuring Silent Lambs Project, Kept See, Un Tha Rhyme Hustla & Boombox Massacre, Cam the Viking, 6 Deep The Messenger, The Tough Breaks, plus eeetree the selector and hosted by Mr. Von and Rizeberg. All Ages. 9 pm.

• People, this month's Word 3rd Thursday is packed with hip-hop goodness. Hosted by Mr. Von and Weekly Volcano's columnist Josh Rizeberg, the show at The New Frontier Lounge will be dope. The show is a regional showcase featuring Silent Lambs Project (Seattle), Kept See (Almighty Universal Zulu-Nation), Un Tha Rhyme Hustla & Boom-box Massacre (first performance), Cam the Viking (Gonzo Family), 6 Deep The Messenger, The Tough Breaks (Olympia) and music by eeetree the selector. Rizeberg gives props to all the performers, "It will be a well-rounded night of eclectic hip-hop." Rizeberg has special prop to Silent Lambs Project. "They are one of the most influential, conscious, politically-minded, hip-hoppers to ever come-out of Seattle," says Rizeberg. "Before Blue Scholars and Macklemore, it was Silent Lambs Project that got all the critical acclaim." Rizeberg also touches on 6 Deep, "He mixes poetry, live-music, and hip-hop into a stunningly deep performance." — NM
  

Northern Olympia - Downtown. Sei Hexe, Shadows, Vanguard. All Ages. 9 pm. $5.

The Red Room Tacoma - Downtown. Acoustic Night: The Learning Process, Jason Kay, Rodney Mitchell and Cooper Inveen. All Ages. 7 pm. $3.

Spar Cafe Olympia - Downtown. James Coates. 8 pm. NC.

LINK: More live music and DJs tonight in the greater Tacoma and Olympia area

THE LOWDOWN ON WHAT'S UP THIS WEEKEND >>>

WEATHER REPORT

Friday: Mostly cloudy, hi 50, lo 44

Saturday: Rain on and off, hi 51, lo 41

Sunday: Cloudy with a few showers, hi 49, lo 43

>>> THURSDAY, NOV. 15: AKA AND THE HEART HURTS GOOD

Thursday night AKA and the Heart Hurt Goods will play its first show at one of Olympia's favorite venues, the Eastside Club, where dreadlocks, mohawks and ponytails all bob and weave through the dance floor to some of the regions best bands. AKA and the Heart Hurt Goods join the club with their fresh style of performance hip-hop. With a new CD under their belt, (release party coming soon!) the group is riding high on a wave of energy, bringing messages of love, both light-hearted and deep-seeded. The band has good looking merchandise, too. "We're very excited about playing at the Eastside," says Mark Bowen, AKA. "There is a large constituent of people that only go to the Eastside because they love really good beers, so go there we must. It's one of the last remaining venues in town we haven't got to rock yet." - Nikki McCoy

• The Eastside Club Tavern, with Jeff Campbell Band and Elbow Coulee, Thursday, Nov 15, 9 p.m., $3, 410 4th Ave E, Olympia, 360.357.9985

>>> FRIDAY, NOV. 16: THE NEO-FUTURIST

The Neo-Futurist, an experimental theater company from Chicago, are returning to Tacoma to perform their signature show, Too Much Light Makes the Baby Go Blind, inside the Norton Clapp Theatre at the University of Puget Sound.The show includes 30 short, original plays performed by the ensemble in just 60 minutes. The audience throws a wrench in the whirlwind pace by picking the order of the 30 plays from "menus" prepared for them by the troupe. It's perfect theater for those with short attention spans whom also wish they were directors. — Weekly Volcano

• Norton Clapp Theatre, 10:30 p.m., price determined by the roll of a dice, 1500 N. Warner, Tacoma, 253.879.3555
  

>>> FRIDAY, NOV. 16: TRIPOD SLIDE SHOW

The wilderness does strange things to people. Isolated from the hustle and bustle of the city, surrounded by pine trees and reclusive coots, the mind can begin to play tricks on folks, causing them to see shadows in the forest when they're out walking alone or hear voices in the breeze. Sometimes, you even have to cut your arm off with a pocketknife. Friday, three local photographers will show slides of their latest adventures in the wilderness. Nina Rook introduces GREEN! ... The Olympia Peninsula.  Dan Fear presents Mountain Climbing Vistas in Nepal and Peru photographed by Ron Fear (b 1944 - d 1973). Kathy Gore-Fuss shares Grand Canyon: Foot by Foot. Get there early. Seats go fast. — Ron Swarner

• Madera Furniture Company, 7-8:30 p.m., $5, 2210 Court A, Tacoma, 253.572.1218
  

>>> SATURDAY, NOV. 17: TACOMA CASH MOB

If you picked up last week's edition of the Weekly Volcano, then you know all about Katy Evans and her involvement with the greater good of Tacoma. Saturday, 1 p.m., catch her and other like-minded individuals (yourself included?) in action as they embark on a very special Tacoma Cash Mob. This holiday inspired event has its very first sponsor who will be handing out prizes to the first 80 adults that claim a ticket. Meeting spot is Rainier Room of the Landmark Convention Center. After a hug, everyone will venture to mystery spots to spend cash, help local businesses, knock out some holiday shopping and pick up their special gift. Evans writes, "And when I say special, I mean REALLY special - the motherload really, thanks to a very cool cash mob sponsor!" — NM

• Landmark Convention Center, Rainier Room (2nd Floor), Tacoma Cash Mob, Saturday, Nov 17, 1 p.m., 47 St Helens Ave., Tacoma, www.facebook.com/tacomacashmob

>>> SUNDAY, NOV. 18: FANTASY LIGHTS WALK

It gets cold out there, but it sure is fun and the crisp air sparks the holiday spirit in even the most curmudgeon among the walkers. A family tradition in the South Sound is walking through the Fantasy Lights displays at Spanaway Park. The 2.5 mile route is open to walkers for a preview. Beginning Nov. 22 you can drive the loop to see some 300 light displays that range from a skiing snowman to a tank firing snowballs to a pirate ship and jumping rain deer. Fantasy Lights, now in its 18th year, is the Northwest's largest drive-through holiday lights display. — WV

• Spanaway Park,5-7 p.m., $4, $12 family, 14824 S. C St., Spanaway, 253.841.8515

WHAT SOME OF OUR STAFF MEMBERS ARE UP TO

CHRISTIAN CARVAJAL Theater Critic
I'm seeing Avenue Q in Seattle and, should the literary gods so grant, finishing Michael Chabon's Telegraph Avenue.

REV. ADAM MCKINNEY Music Writer
Saturday, I'll be hitting up The New Frontier for one of my favorite local bands, the Riffbrokers. Time permitting, I'll also be spending some more time considering whether or not I should see The Perks of Being a Wallflower. Everyone's saying it's good, but they also said that about that dumb book, too. Fool me twice? We'll see.

ALEC CLAYTON Arts Critic
I'm going to see A Christmas Survival Guide at Harlequin Productions in Olympia and maybe ... just maybe if we can get five very busy people together at the same time we're going to rehearse the staged reading from my new book, Return to Freedom.

NIKKI MCCOY Feature Writer
After recovering from a night of HUMP! I plan to take it easy tonight, although there a lot of fun shows. I will probably re-arrange my furniture, to be honest. Friday will be the usual happy hour shenanigans, with a walk down to McCoy's Tavern in Olympia for a bitchin Mosquito Hawk, Argonaut and All Hail The Yeti show. Saturday is always laundry. Sunday will be Thanksgiving prep. Re-reading this, I realize, damn, Friday night is where it's at. I wish I could stay there all weekend, as I don't care for laundry or cooking, and I do love me some good ole dirty rock 'n' roll.

JACKIE FENDER Food Writer
Sadly my weekend is mostly uneventful. Ill be slinging breakfast and booze at Dirty Oscars. Then having an after work Manhattan if I'm so inclined.

JOANN VARNELL Theater Critic
This weekend is chock full of theater! I will be reviewing Lakewood Playhouse's production of Shakespeare's Twelfth Night. Sunday, I will be heading to Seattle for Wicked, which will make all of my friends happy since they will finally be allowed to talk about how great they thought it was when they saw it (weeks ago). I will be spending the rest of the time trying to get my adorable two year old to learn new party tricks in time for the upcoming holiday season.

TIMOTHY GRISHAM Music Writer
Music history has been full of individuals mining horror imagery for tying the macabre with rock n' roll. From Screaming Lord Sutch on one end, to perhaps more contemporary examples such as GWAR, "shock rock" is entertainment personified. Alice Cooper, who helped solidify the genre with the Alice Cooper Group performs his set of classics this Sunday (Nov. 18) at the Emerald Queen Casino. Take it as a somewhat rare opportunity to see Cooper perform in a venue that is not a small arena.

JOSH RIZEBERG Music Columnist
Friday night I'll be at Backstage in Tacoma to watch Alabama transplant Bama Da Prince. He's performing and local Johnni Boi will be hosting the night. Saturday at 1 p.m. I'll be teaching my Spoken-Word/Poetry class at D.A.S.H. My class is part of the Art of Hip-Hop project. A.O.H.H. is compused of hip-hop culture classes, rhyming, writing and recording. Saturday, my hip-hop group Beanz & Rize has a show in Centrailia. Sunday, I will be recovering.

JENNI BORAN Features Writer
I'll be tackling the Mustache Dache 5k at Magnuson Park in Seattle. I hear the event has a mechanical bull. Bonus!

STEVE DUNKELBERGER Photog About Town
I will be hitting the Truman Middle School Orchestra concert tonight to admire the violin section. Friday will bring Tacoma Brewing Tap Night in the Triangle District. I will be leading a photo safari class on low-light picture taking Saturday, space is still available. Sunday will likely mean hanging out with some guy named Alice Cooper at the Emerald Queen.

NIC LEONARD Music Writer
Friday night I will be attending the Portland Trailblazers game.  I'll be spending the rest of my weekend in Portland as well, at various bars.

ROCKFORD ROWLEY All-Ages Music Columnist
Hanging out at Bluebeard Coffee.

LINK: Even more local events that we recommend

LINK: Comprehensive South Sound Arts & Entertainment Calendar

FRIDAY, NOV. 16, 2012 >>>

1. As vocalist, lead guitarist and songwriter for Tacoma's Goldfinch, Aaron Stevens knows all too well the challenges of finding venues in Tacoma that serve the needs not only of musicians, but of the listener. It is Stevens' hope that Cathedrals will raise the bar for Tacoma's musical experience, nurturing the city's vibrant, but sometimes underappreciated music scene and drawing to Tacoma musicians that have found success in bigger markets. Tonight at 7:30 p.m., the historic walls of Tacoma's Immanuel Presbyterian Church will be filled with some very fresh sounds. Indie groups Drew Grow and the Pastors' Wives, Goldfinch and Pollens make up the impressive line-up for Cathedrals Tacoma: Part Three. 

2. Seattle poet and filmmaker Rose McAleese will be performing selections from her new book, Strong. Female. Character, at 7 p.m. inside Orca Books in Olympia. McAleese is a rising star in the Northwest slam poetry firmament.

3. Johannes Brahms was a German Romantic composer who aspired to be a Classicist in the Beethoven mold - to the extent that he refused to allow titles tacked onto any of his instrumental-genre works: symphonies, concertos, string quartets and quintets, piano trios and quartets, piano sonatas, etc. Any one of them is simply known as "genre" number N in "some" key, opus "some number." You listen for sound only and savor whatever mood it evokes for you. And savor is exactly what you should do tonight when the Tacoma Community College Orchestra performs music of Beethoven and Brahms, with Tanya Stambuk on piano.  The 7:30 p.m. concert is free and open to the public in TCC Building 2 Auditorium.

4. The BareFoot Collective continues its pop-up contemporary dance performances with an 8 p.m. performance inside Cork Wine Bar in Tacoma. The 30-40 minutes of innovative modern dance should pair nicely with a Cabernet.

5. Start talking about Mosquito Hawk's talent, hair, high tops and cute tooth gaps all rolled into one epic super group, and Olympia gets a little wet between the legs. The band drops in on McCoy's Tavern at 9 p.m. with Argonaut and All Hail the Yeti. It's going to be a hell ride of gut-wrenching, hair-raising, badass, mutha lovin' goodness.

PLUS: The Neo-Futurist and Tripod Slide Show events in our Weekend Hustle

LINK: Friday, Nov. 16 arts and entertainment events in the greater Tacoma and Olympia area

FUTURE THINGS ARE COMING >>>

The equation is simple. Tacoma is for Lovers is a community group dedicated to presenting artists craft fairs to promote and appreciate our awesome local artists. King's Books is an awesome local bookstore that loves to host local arts events. Together, they will combine their artsy prowess to produce the Tacoma is for Lovers Craft Fair this weekend. The fair will feature arts and crafts spanning from jewelry to letterpress prints and beyond.

"I love and rely on the Tacoma is for Lovers Artist Craft Fair - not only does it jumpstart my holiday shopping and help me discover all sorts of amazing locally crafted goods, but I have also made friends and found new artists who are doing incredible work in Tacoma," says co-founder Katy Evans, who also coordinates the Tacoma Cash Mob.

Speaking of the Cash Mob, King's Books' website has a cash mob on its events calendar ... meeting nearby ... Nov. 17 ... at 1 p.m. Curious.

"There MAY be something different this year and it MAY be related to the Tacoma Cash Mob occurring at 1 p.m.," says Evans. "The cash mob is meeting across the street in the Rainier Room in the Landmark Convention Center. That's some suspicious proximity!"

In addition to an entirely theoretical cash mob that you could theoretically join, the Tacoma is for Lovers Artist Craft Fair welcomes new artists such as Chick Knigge, Tracie Bonjour and Little Green Cards. Fingerprint Confections will also be at the fair. Fingerprint Confections created the original Caramel Loves handmade caramels, and now offers bacon, lavender, coconut, sea salt and gingerbread caramels.

KING'S BOOKS, SATURDAY, NOV. 17-SUNDAY, NOV. 18, 11 A.M. TO 4 P.M., 218 SAINT HELENS AVE., TACOMA, 253.272.8801

LINK: More events this weekend in the South Sound

YAY! A 10 THINGS LIST! >>>

Franciscan Polar Plaza is a magical place set into the charming and historical backdrop of downtown Tacoma's Tollefson Plaza - the perfect way to celebrate the holidays with your family or significant other, or even a wonderful spot to meet a stranger (just think of the stories you can tell your grandchildren). You may ice skate on the indoor rink, sip a mug of hot chocolate or enjoy live music on the Weekly Volcano's music stage. Polar Plaza ensures a holiday experience for all and here are just a few of the reasons why this cold-weather attraction rocks downtown Tacoma.

1. Decorations

"We're excited to continue to have the community help decorate the benches for Polar Plaza. It seems like a small thing, but it's a fun art element that everyone who visits the rink will get the chance to use and admire." - Stephanie Stebich, director of Tacoma Art Museum

2. Family Fun

"The Polar Plaza adds yet another special and unique family destination to downtown Tacoma that creates lasting memories during the holiday season ... it is a new tradition I hope to see carried on for many years to come." - Thomas Duke, TAM Director of Membership

3. It's Magical!

"What I like most about the Franciscan Polar Plaza is the sound of children laughing as they skate around the rink. The indoor ice rink creates a magical atmosphere that appeals to both adults and children. It is a part of our community for only a few weeks but, during that time, the rink is one of the happiest places in Tacoma. The Polar Plaza brings families together to make holiday memories that may be shared for the rest of their lives." - Dianna Kielian, senior vice president - Mission for the Franciscan Health System

4. Downtown Dollars

"This will be our fourth year in the plaza and our vision is coming to fruition. The vision has been helping bring holiday dollars downtown to local businesses, while getting people walking around enjoying downtown during the holidays. The ice skating rink is serving as the perfect pinnacle to that vision." - Justin Mayfield, Two Five Trees owner

5. Romance

"I was told this story from a lady that works at Grassi's Flowers. She told me that she knows a young lady that was visiting during her winter break of college and she went ice skating at Polar Plaza. While she was skating she fell and when the attendant came to her aid, their eyes met and apparently the rest is history so to say, now they are planning their wedding!" - Judi Hyman, Downtown Merchants Group president

6. Community Fellowship

"The number one reason I think Polar Plaza is the ‘bomb' is the community fellowship it provides. It is a delight to see people laughing and interacting with each other where they may not have otherwise had the opportunity." - Sean Peterson, Igneous Rocks drummer, performing Dec. 1 at Polar Plaza

7. It Makes Tacoma Hip Like NYC

"It is Tacoma's own little holiday version of Rockefeller Plaza's famous ice rink. It makes me want a hot cup of cocoa--or maybe an adult winter beverage like Pacific Grill's famous Hot Buttered Rum." - Gordon Naccarato, Pacific Grill owner

8. Nostalgia

"I grew up in Tacoma and have fond memories of my family skating at the ice rink by Lake Steilacoom. We are so fortunate to have an organization such as the TAM that spearheads this fabulous use of Tollefson Plaza during the Holidays."  - Steve Gray, Gray Lumber - a Polar Plaza sponsor

9. See and Be Seen

"Polar Plaza is the cool place to be seen with your friends and share quality time with the family in the only south end outdoor rink." - Katie Caldwell, overseer of the people who clean the ice

10. Ironically, Might Help You Warm Up

"When it's cold outside, I feel that there's no better place to be than at Polar Plaza, serving hot chocolate and cookies to the skaters at the ice rink." - Megan Jones, hot-chocolate server and Visitor Services manager at Tacoma Art Museum

FRANCISCAN POLAR PLAZA, FRIDAY, NOV. 23-SUNDAY, JAN. 26, $4-$8, TOLLEFSON PLAZA, 17TH AND PACIFIC AVENUE, TACOMA, 253.272.4258

South Sound Sidekick series offers advice from experts living in the, well, the South Sound. It posts every Friday. Today, The Counselor is back with advice for those pulled over for speeding.

Dear Counselor,

I got a speeding ticket. What should I do?

ANSWER: Obviously slow down!  Quit driving that Hot Rod Lincoln.

Everyone at some point in his or her life will probably get a speeding ticket.  What should you do?  Here in Washington state you have four choices; you can 1) pay the ticket 2) ask for a mitigation hearing, 3) ask that the ticket be deferred or 4) contest the ticket.

Let's look at each of your options for a minute and the consequences of the choice you make.

If you pay the ticket it will remain on your driving record for three years.  You car insurance could increase by 10 to 11 percent per year for the three years. (Depending on your carrier). You might not have had a ticket in 15 years, but you know what they say, "When it rains it pours."  I have spoken with many insurance agents who say that same thing, no infractions in 20 years and then two or three in a short time, not good.

You can ask to mitigate the fine. Mitigation is where you go and tell the judge why you had a good reason to be speeding and the ask the court to cut you some slack, which will, in most cases, be granted to some extent. All this does is reduce the fine, it still goes on your record as an infraction and stays there for three years and has the same insurance issues.

You can go to court - and if you have not had a ticket in the last seven years - you can ask that the ticket be differed under RCW 46.63.070.  Basically, this means you pay court costs, typically around $150.00 and if you don't get any more tickets for one year the case is dismissed and does not go on your record. But, if you get another speeding ticket in that year then, well you are looking at two tickets not one.  Remember, when it rains it pours.

My suggestion?  I am a firm believer in option #4.  Hire an experienced criminal defense lawyer and let them do their job.  An attorney trained in traffic infractions can almost always make the outcome of you situation better (not always, but nothing in the world is 100 percent), either by getting the ticket dismissed, or getting it modified to a non-moving violation.

With a lawyer you probably won't have to take a day off work to go to court, you won't have to stand up in a courtroom and make an argument to a judge and you will greatly increase the chances your insurance premiums won't be skyrocketing. For some people that is money well spent.

Now, what to do when pulled over for speeding? Be polite, as with all things in life, politeness goes a long way in making things better. The officer in the field has tremendous discretion in what they do and what message they convey to the judge who will ultimately decide your case.

The citing officer only writes a few lines on the back of the ticket.  But those words will clearly telegraph to the judge whether or not you were a butthead. If the judge gets the feeling before you even open your mouth that you are a jerk, it is going to make prevailing just that much more difficult.  So BE POLITE DAMMIT.

Next, do not say anything to the officer about your speed.  First question out of the officer's mouth always is "You know why I stopped you?"  Then you say something (that by the way will always be written on the back of the ticket) like "Speeding?" with a sheepish look on your face. Or "Sorry I was talking on my cell phone"  (Whoops another $125), or the classic "I am running late."  Basically these are all admissions that you were speeding and you knew it.  Be polite and do not answer questions about your speed or why you were stopped.

That's it for me.

The Counselor. 

P.S Stay out of the left lane unless you are passing every one.  It is an infraction to drive in the left lane and impede traffic so stop doing it. And it really frosts my ass.

ONLINE CHATTER >>>

Yesterday's comment of the day comes from Bill in regards to a negative comment posted on Bruno's European Cafe listing in our South Sound restaurant Guide.

Bill writes,

Sorry to read Courtney's eval. She must have been at another restaurant. Our food was GREAT - as authentic German as I've ever had. As others said it reminded me of Mom and Grand-ma's cooking, too. Try to get there as often as I can. Sad to say the liver and onions is no longer a regular - it was the best I've had anywhere in Tacoma, not even second to what Mom cooked - it was first. Bruno, his wife and Tricia are the friendliest ever. Don't know how they do it and work so hard - must be the German beer!!!