Mirror, mirror, on the wall, this is Nerd Alert, the Weekly Volcano's recurring events calendar devoted to all things nerdy. I myself am a Star Wars fan, mathlete, and spelling bee champion of long standing, so trust me: I grok whereof I speak.
FRIDAY, APRIL 11
The biggest movie release this week is called Oculus. It's a horror film about a haunted mirror. I will write that again: it's a horror film about a haunted mirror. I mention this cinematic spectacle only because as of time of writing, with nine critics reporting in, it boasts a RottenTomatoes.com score of 100 percent. Make of that what you will.
SATURDAY, APRIL 12
My wife and I are performing alongside friends from Masterworks Choral Ensemble and Olympia Family Theater in Sing for a Cure, a "song cycle" to benefit cancer research. Proceeds go to the Susan G. Komen Breast Cancer Foundation, so we sure hope you'll join us for a program of empathy and hope.
SING FOR THE CURE, 7:30 p.m., Washington Center for the Performing Arts, 512 Washington St. SE, Olympia, $9-$19, 360.753.8585
This is a big night for ladybumps, as it's also when Stripped Screw Burlesque unveils its "Disney After Dark" revue in the Capitol Theater. Seattle princesses Seraphina Fiero and Maxie Milieu are joined by sultry local superstars Hattie Hotpants and Nani Poonani of TUSH.
DISNEY AFTER DARK, 9 p.m., Capitol Theater, 206 Fifth Ave. SE, Olympia, $15-$20, 360.754.6670
If you're spry, you might even make both shows. Let it go, indeed!
SUNDAY, APRIL 13
Sunday's MTV Movie Awards will present a special "Silver Bucket of Excellence" to 1998, the last year anyone cared about the MTV Movie Awards. Consequently, someone will wonder out loud whether Neve Campbell, the big winner that year, is still alive. Perhaps it'll be this year's host, Conan O'Brien, who asks the indelicate questions.
(The first time I wrote that paragraph, I used Ken Ober as its unwilling punchline. Guess what, though? It turns out Ken Ober is actually deceased - I had no idea - so don't I feel like quite the old geezer? Remote Control, people! Give it up for "Wheel of Torture!" ...Dear gravy, I'm old.)
Here's the thing about being happily married: you only have time for so much TV, even with a DVR. Therefore, if you aren't both fans of a show, it drops off your list of season recordings. I was able to hang on to Archer and Community, thank Dionysus, but Mad Men fell right off my queue. Is it still the 1960s on that show? Is Peggy still far and away the best thing on it? I have no idea, so find out for yourself when season 7, Mad Men's final go-round, begins Sunday.
TUESDAY, APRIL 15
The TV adaptation of Fargo debuts on FX, don't ya know. It stars Martin Freeman, Adam Goldberg, Colin Hanks, both Key and Peele (I'm serious), Joey King, Bob Odenkirk, Oliver Platt, Billy Bob Thornton, Kate Walsh, two wacky robots, the entire first-season cast of The West Wing, and a partridge in a pear tree. It's made by the guy responsible for Bones, so it'll last forever even though no one you know will ever watch it.
Until next week, may the Force be with you, may the odds be ever in your favor, and may you never find yourself trapped in the basement of 72 Whooping Cough Lane. I want my MTV!