Every so often here at the Volcano, we receive a press release so goshdarn well-crafted that we're tempted to reprint it verbatim and call it a day. Matt Schwartz's email for an upcoming event featuring the band Quasar Wut-Wut is just such a document; but unfortunately for us, we also go through intermittent periods of semi-professionalism. We shall paraphrase Schwartz's missive accordingly.

You may be unfamiliar with Quasar Wut-Wut, a Motor City-born, Windy City-based quartet that classifies itself as experimental, post-punk, art pop. I have no earthly idea what those words mean when jumbled together, but I do like Quasar's music. In any case, you may be equally unschooled in the oeuvre of one Joseph "Buster" Keaton. Perhaps you think he was a character on Family Ties. Perhaps you're so young you don't remember Family Ties either, and are wondering who gave Grandpa the remote.

I'll start again.

I first became aware of Keaton's 1926 classic film The General when Roger Ebert credited it for elements of the thrillingly ridiculous mine-car sequence in Temple of Doom. No less an authority than Orson Welles called The General "the greatest comedy ever made, the greatest Civil War film ever made, and perhaps the greatest film ever made." Again, I don't know about all that, but The General is one of the most entertaining silent films you can find. Watching it, you realize that what you're seeing is the invention of the modern-day action film, using techniques and dynamics we're still awed by today. Not only did Keaton figure out how to inject raw testosterone into the movies, he also did all his own stunts. One wrong move, and Keaton would've gone down in history as "that old-timey director guy who smeared the bottom of a locomotive with his face."

The General does have one glaring omission, I'm afraid: sound, because the technology to add sound to flickering images was still in its crib. Try as he might, Keaton was unable to run screaming and yodeling into every cinema in the country, so instead, live pianists added an oft-improvised soundtrack. That's where Quasar Wut-Wut comes in. Back in 2004, they wrote their own surprisingly contemporary score for The General, a concept album they call Taro Sound. They'll be performing Taro Sound along with The General in support of a new album, Digesting Mirror. They also perform their own stunts, which include a bouncy, happy new single, "Dark Love."

It's exceptional music, played live for free at an equally free screening of an undeniably awesome movie. I mean, don't trust me - that fat guy who played Unicron said so! And hey, the Washington Center is Olympia's cultural temple, so you don't have to worry about some bee-hole behind you spilling half a gallon of soda on your head!

Yeah, take that, Matt Schwartz's press release.

QUASAR WUT-WUT, 7:30 p.m. Saturday, July 26, Washington Center for the Performing Arts, 512 Washington St. SE, Olympia, free admission, 360.753.8585

GRAB A COFFEE AND READ THE MORNING REPORT FOR 7.22.2014 >>>

The Iraqi ambassador to the United States explicitly called for ramped up American military involvement in his country, asking the United States to launch air strikes against positions being held by ISIL.

Restoring peace to Iraq will require a re-balancing or disengagement of the center from the periphery, either de facto or de jure.

Beijing has defended its dispatch of a spy ship to international waters off Hawaii, near where Chinese vessels are taking part in a U.S.-led naval exercise for the first time.

The shooting down of a Malaysian Airlines passenger aircraft over eastern Ukraine is likely to further contribute to security concerns in Eastern Europe, where NATO allies eye increased cooperation in the field of defense and joint arms procurements.

Congress is deeply divided over whether to kill a contract with a top Russian arms supplier, Rosoboronexport, to provide helicopters and parts to the Afghan air force. 

Terror threat enters danger zone.

President Barack Obama awarded the Medal of Honor to former Staff Sgt Ryan M. Pitts during a White House ceremony.

Sen. Bernie Sanders (I-Vt.) says lawmakers tasked with hammering out a bipartisan legislation that would overhaul the Veterans Affairs Department have agreed that budget cuts should help fund any eventual bill.

President Barack Obama's choice to lead the beleaguered Veterans Affairs Department is going before the Senate Veterans Affairs Committee for a confirmation hearing as Congress considers a bill to help the next VA leader do his job.

Medical professionals from coast to coast have pointed out problems at the VA, only to suffer retaliation from supervisors and other high-ranking officials.

New high-tech job training efforts being launched by the White House this week will include veteran-specific programs and placement efforts.

Oklahoma lawmakers urged the Obama administration to reconsider a decision to expand housing at U.S. military bases for child immigrants from Central American who are apprehended crossing the border. 

Special Report: Top five best bases for airmen. (Joint Base Lewis-McChord tied for 39th).

100 Guardsmen on standby to fight fires in Washington state.

The Air Force plans to launch two operational satellites and one experimental satellite into near-geosynchronous Earth orbit July 23.

Army officials have withdrawn their intelligence network from a major testing exercise this fall because of software glitches, in the latest setback for the troubled system.

The Army is "breaking new ground" in efforts to combat sexual harassment and sexual assault in the ranks.

Carl Sagan explains why aliens are not visiting us all the time.

Here's an insanely scary roller coaster for those who need to feel like they're close to dying in order to feel like they're living.

Driving in Russia is flirting with death-watch these three accidents happening in 30 seconds.

Hear a rockin' new Weezer track.

FX has renewed Fargo and Louie.

Sure, we have time for a 278-hour marathon of The Simpsons ...

Watch a five-minute clip from Guardians of the Galaxy.

In this video, Dave Foley welcomes the Ramones to heaven.

And finally, here is a crab eating a bowl of noodles.

LINK: Original photo by Lance Cpl. MaryAnn Hill

TUESDAY, JULY 22 2014 >>>

1. A few years ago, Canadian filmmaker Brent Hodge was at dinner with friends when one of them, Ashleigh Ball, started talking about a curious side-effect of her job. Ball is the voice of Applejack, Rainbow Dash and other characters on the TV series My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic. Her biggest fans? Little girls ... and grown men. "Bronies" are mostly men who are fans of the show. They get their day in the sun in A Brony Tale, a documentary screening at 2 and 7 p.m. at The Grand Cinema.

2. Join film critic Robert Horton for a conversation about some of the wildest book-to-movie adaptations and how they can show us something new at 6:30 p.m. in the Olympia Timberland Library. Horton will touch on some notably creative adaptations. How did The Tempest become Forbidden Planet? How did Jane Eyre turn into I Walked with a Zombie? And how on earth did the Coen Brothers take Homer's Odyssey and come up with O Brother, Where Art Thou? See how a wild adaptation cannot only illuminate the original, even when we barely recognize it, but also teach us about being open to the unexpected.

3. The Beatniks, Seattle's most famous cover band ('60s-'80s) will perform an outside concert at Skansie Brothers Park in Gig Harbor beginning at 6:30 p.m.

4. Every Tuesday night at Stonegate Pizza on South Tacoma Way Leanne Trevalyan hosts an acoustic open mic at 8 p.m.

5. The Washington Center hosts the legendary Joan Baez for an evening encompassing five decades of music. Baez, a fixture of the 1960s folk and protest movements as well as concert companion to Bob Dylan, remains a musical force of nature whose influence is incalculable. Her earliest recordings fed traditional ballads into the rock vernacular with appeal extending far beyond folk music. She takes the stage at 8 p.m.

LINK: Tuesday, July 22 arts and entertainment events in the greater Tacoma and Olympia area

"Weird Al" Yankovic's Mandatory Fun

This week finds "Weird Al" Yankovic finishing up his victory lap following the release of his latest album, Mandatory Fun. To celebrate his new release, Yankovic released eight music videos in as many days, ending with his "Suite: Judy Blue Eyes" parody, "Mission Statement." As an album, Mandatory Fun finds "Weird Al" at his most mature and musically daring. Sure, he parodies all of the mega hits you'd expect, but he approaches them in a way that actually gives one insight into the way the man feels.

"Word Crimes" and "Tacky," in particular, accomplish more than their inspirations ("Blurred Lines" and "Happy," respectively). The former is a grammar nerd's dream, taking apart infuriatingly common mistakes in speech; "Tacky," meanwhile, breaks down just how garish and nonchalantly terrible and narcissistic people have become.

One of the most delightful songs on the album, "First World Problems," is interesting even apart from its social commentary. The song is a style-parody of the Pixies, which is an unexpected thing, even if you know that "Weird Al" has always been into alternative music. With jagged, surfy guitars and yelping lead vocals, it's as much of a dead-on homage as Yankovic's style-parody of the Doors ("Craigslist") was, last time around.

McG's Shel Silverstein

Now that your heart has been warmed by the resurgence of "Weird Al," it's time to balance that out with this catastrophic blow to your childhood: there is a Shel Silverstein biopic in the works, and, there's just no other way to say this, but McG is behind it. Yes, everyone's favorite absurdist children's book writer (not to mention gloriously profane and silly songwriter) is being teamed up with the man that brought us This Means War, 3 Days to Kill and the Charlie's Angels franchise.

I know there's no way to spin this as great news, but it is possible that this won't be the worst thing in the world. I mean, right? At least the notion that someone with as fascinating a life as Silverstein's is getting the film treatment is heartening. But there's a McG-shaped shadow that looms over this news, and that's just gonna be a hard one to shake. My advice: close your eyes, lock yourself in your bedroom, and recite "Sarah Cynthia Sylvia Stout" as fast as you can, over and over again, until our long, national McG nightmare is over.

GRAB A CUP AND READ THE MORNING REPORT FOR 7.23.2014 >>>

Israeli forces pounded Gaza, meeting stiff resistance from Hamas Islamists, as U.S. Secretary of State John Kerry pushes ceasefire talks.  

The costly Iron Dome missile defense system is proving its worth and the need for laser missile defense systems.

To deter Hamas, the military plans to destroy the homes of Palestinians accused of violence - displacing families in the process.

Hamas won't back down. And Israel refuses to stop until it feels the job is done. What is Israel's endgame in Gaza?

Senior U.S. intelligence officials said Russia was responsible for "creating the conditions" that led to the shooting down of Malaysia Airlines Flight 17, but they offered no evidence of direct Russian government involvement.

Russian statements expressing skepticism that the U.S. can produce satellite images showing a surface-to-air missile shooting down the Malaysia Airlines jet on July 17 shows 'desperation' on Russia's part.

Brits investigating assassination of the spy who warned us about Putin.

A bipartisan group of lawmakers is urging President Obama to do more to prevent the French government from selling warships to Russia after the crash of Malaysia Airlines Flight 17.

China's recent unrelenting drive to use coercive and intimidating state power, short of direct application of military force, to advance control of disputed territory in the East China Sea and the South China Sea poses a major problem for the United States.

Shadow Wars: U.S. military - with its signature aircraft carriers, submarines, jet fighters and heavily armored vehicles - may be too deeply invested in very expensive capabilities poorly designed to deal effectively with these new threats.

Budget cuts are forcing the Pentagon to send "pink slips" to thousands of military personnel, including some currently serving in Afghanistan.

VA nominee Bob McDonald: "Change can be achieved"

Air Force launching satellites to spy on other satellites.

The outgoing head of the U.S. Air Force Space Command said the time is right for a new rocket engine to be developed in the United States.

Congress must extent brain rehab program for veterans.

A World War II officer who trained the country's first black Marines was laid to rest at the Roseburg National Cemetery Annex.

SilencerCo's New Shotgun Suppressor: The Salvo 12 is a modular design that allows the shooter to add or remove sections to balance length and weight.

Seeing real U.S. Navy SEALs moving underwater is way cooler than any movie.

This amazing tree produces 40 different kinds of fruit.

All the supernovas ever photographed in one spectacular collection.

List: Here are 10 of the most awesomest movies stunts in film history.

Rob Reiner reflects on Spinal Tap in the latest ep of Sound Opinions. 

Get ready for the seedless mango.

Did you know they've now introduced Peanut Butter Cheerios?

What are the happiest and unhappiest cities in America?

The United States will fall to pieces beginning Aug. 21 ...

LINK: Original photo by Petty Officer 3rd Class Joshua Nistas

WEDNESDAY, JULY 23 2014 >>>

1. With a timeless vocal delivery only matched by her engaging stage presence, Kim Archer and her band have been pleasing live music fans in our area since 2004. Archer's powerful voice a la Janis Joplin and Chaka Khan gelled nicely with the sonic buzz of the guitar and groove from the backbeat. Archer commands the stage playing her own original songs rooted in old school soul, funk and classic rock, sultry blues and ballads while remaining a master at giving choice cover tunes the "Kim Archer treatment, such as the crowd pleasure "Shaft." The 7 p.m. show has moved from Sylvester Park to the Washington Center due to the rain.

2. Moss + Mineral is an easy-to-overlook design store tucked away in a small space on Ninth Street near a bail bondsman in downtown Tacoma. They show art and photography by some of the area's best. Featured through July are works by Carlos Taylor-Swanson (fine woodworking); Claudia Riedener (ceramics); the design team ofAdrienne WicksandJeff Libby (fine woodworking); Holly Senn (sculpture) and Harriet McNamara (photography). Read Alec Clayton's full review of "Natural Spectacle: Art + eco-Furnishings in the Music & Culture section, then check it out at Moss + Mineral from noon to 5 p.m.

3. Farmers markets come in all sizes, shapes and vibes, but the atmosphere of the new Sunset Market is definitively about fun. Right off the bat, it turns the tables on the usual early-morning affairs we're used to by hosting its vendors in the evenings, from 3 to 7:30 p.m. - a Puyallup version of Tacoma's 6th Ave Farmers Market if you will. The Sunset Market focuses on local farmers, growers, processors, artisans, downtown merchants and food vendors accompanied by live entertainment, demonstrations and more. The farmers' party continues every Wednesday through Sept. 17.

4. Cooper Point Public House in Olympia will be hosting Hood River darlings Double Mountain from 6-9 p.m. Expect Kolsch-In Cologne, Homestead-Orange, Lil Red Pils and the newly-released Clusterf#ck. Remember when Cluster was the dominant hop in the U.S. brewing industry? Read up on Clusterf#ck here.

5. Forget light and low-carb beers. The Tacoma Runners have a better method for fighting fat: They run then drink beer. They're the classic drinking group with a running problem. The problem is, REI has called them out to double their running this week. Apparently REI has a new bitchin' truck they want to show off, so they called the Thursday running group and convinced them to gather for a special Wednesday night run and drink. No problem, the Tacoma Runners are in, and will meet at the Parkway Tavern at 6:30 p.m. for a 3-mile jaunt with their new REI buddies followed by craft beers back the Tacoma tavern. Tomorrow night's 3-mile run and beer outing will be at the Chalet Bowl in the Proctor District - same beer time.

LINK: Wednesday, July 23 arts and entertainment events in the greater Tacoma and Olympia area

GRAB A CUP AND READ THE MORNING REPORT FOR 7.24.14 >>>

Gunmen attacked a prisoner convoy north of Baghdad today, setting off a gunbattle with troops in which scores of prisoners and eight soldiers were killed, brutally underscoring Iraq's instability as lawmakers convened to elect a new president.

Israel won a partial reprieve from the economic pain of its Gaza war with the lifting of a U.S. ban on commercial flights to Tel Aviv, while continued fighting pushed the Palestinian death toll over 700. 

U.S. Defense Secretary Chuck Hagel sent a letter to congressional leadership on requesting $225 million in additional funding to accelerate production of Iron Dome missile-defense components to ensure Israel will have adequate stockpiles for protection.

ISIL is now a "full-blown army" in Iraq.

The Islamic State is no longer a juggernaut, it's a motley alliance of factions just waiting to betray each other.

The CIA ran a secret jail on Polish soil, the European Court of Human Rights ruled, piling pressure on Poland, one of Washington's closest allies, to break its long silence about the global program for detaining al Qaeda suspects. 

It's suddenly 1980-something again on Capitol Hill as a Cold War aura fills the halls of Congress.

Army hates to take Guard Apaches, but it "must happen": Under Secretary Carson.

Japan is building two more Aegis antimissile ships.

Britain is still exporting arms and military equipment to Russia, according to a parliamentary report released Wednesday just hours after Prime Minister David Cameron rapped France for selling weapons to Moscow.

Lies, Damned Lies and Maps: Cartography helps set the parameters within which debates over policy and strategy unfold.

Documents detail VA mistreatment of veterans.

Sen. Bernie Sanders (I-Vt.) on Wednesday warned House and Senate lawmakers might not reach a deal on legislation to reform the Veterans Affairs Department before the August recess.

After more than a dozen years fighting wars against unsophisticated opponents and technology in Iraq and Afghanistan, the Air Force is refocusing its training on tests ripped from the headlines - surface-to-air missiles, chemical weapons and cyber warfare.

Changes to military postal operations will save the Defense Department $4 million annually while providing services comparable to those of any U.S. Postal Service office.

CEO of the Army Reserves: "We have a crisis in manning the Reserve. It's a lot harder to recruit and retain than it used to be.

Two female Soldiers recently won national Golden Gloves championships, bringing the number of female amateur boxing national champions in the U.S. Army World Class Athlete Program to four.

Alaska soldier's car struck in Puyallup after transport company files for bankruptcy.

Apple is seriously talking to payments-industry companies about debuting a mobile wallet.

An automatic parachute will keep you from being hit with a drone.

Our new favorite Twitter account: @CrimeADay. Don't even think about profiting from Woodsy the Owl or his signature catchphrase, "Give a Hoot, Don't Pollute." You could get a fine and up to 6 months in prison.

Q&A: Jerry Seinfeld on "Single Shots," "Seinfeld at 25 and more.

Duran Duran is suing its fan club.

This cool startup wants to let anyone become a superhero action figure.

And finally, stare at this guitar, and you may see the ghost of Scooby-Doo.

The greatest anti-piracy ad in the universe ...

LINK: Original photo by Cpl. Justin M. Martinez

THURSDAY, JULY 24 2014 >>>

1. While still dealing with ongoing famine, drought and political corruption, Zimbabwe has still managed to export some of the world's most infectiously joyful music: complex sounds characterized by soaring melodies, intricate vocal harmonies and the kind of polyrhythmic percussion that can induce a collective trance. Zimbabwean Music Festival offers three days of workshops on diverse aspects of Zimbabwean culture, free afternoon concerts, an African Marketplace and ticketed evening concerts at the University of Puget Sound. On opening night at 9 p.m. (tonight), internationally acclaimed Afro-fusion sensation Mokoomba, led by talented vocalist Mathias Muzaza, draws on traditional Tonga music while embracing the diverse music cultures of southern Africa at Schneebeck Concert Hall. Afternoon concerts and the Zimfest marketplace open 10 a.m. to 5 p.m., July 25-27.

2. The Copper Door in Tacoma's Stadium District hosts those pioneers from Alaskan Brewing Co. beginning at 6 p.m. for a Brewer's night featuring beers such as the Icy Bay IPA, giveaways and prizes.

3. Acclaimed singer Hilary Gardner grew up in Wasilla, Alaska infatuated with New York City. Her stunning recording debut, The Great City, is part love letter, part lament to New York and the big dreams it represents. In 2010, Hilary was chosen by the Frank Sinatra estate to appear as the live, onstage singer in Tony-award winner Twyla Tharp's "Come Fly Away." Impressed yet? Multi-platinum recording artist Moby featured Hilary prominently on his 2009 release, Wait For Me. Gotcha! Catch the acclaimed jazz singer from 7-9 p.m. in the Mary Baker Russell Amphitheatre as part of Pacific Lutheran University's Jazz Under the Stars series.

4. Arrows & Stones, Southtowne Lanes and Streetlight Fire play an all-ages show at 8 p.m. in Le Voyeur Café and Lounge in Olympia.

5. Readers voted the Kareem Kandi Band Best Jazz Band in our 2014 Best of Tacoma issue, which is on the street today. Catch this amazing jazz band for free at 8:30 p.m. in the Hotel Murano's lobby.

LINK: Thursday, July 24 arts and entertainment events in the greater Tacoma and Olympia area

The time has finally arrived. The Weekly Volcano's annual Best of Tacoma issue is on the street. And once again it stands alone as the definitive user's guide – for urban explorers and bar stool wise-asses alike - to Grit City and Pierce County.

Maybe you filled out the Weekly Volcano's Best Of Tacoma survey and maybe you didn't. But either way the super-sized, all-powerful Weekly Volcano Best of Tacoma 2014 edition is now spread out on tables or the bottom of birdcages.

If you did vote, then probably you're anxious to discover if you won the random drawing for dinner for two at Lobster Shop and overnight stay in a Premium Suite at the Silver Cloud Inn on Tacoma's waterfront.

Drum roll please ...

Congratulations to Jim Konek of University Place. Our Steno Pool is tracking down Jim.

The 2014 Best of Tacoma will be posted online in a few days.

We thank our readers for their continued support, and our advertisers deserve a nod as well for their part in keeping the Weekly Volcano free and on the streets. Thank you!

During a week of hot weather, heavy clouds and a cold snap threatening when Lt. Col. James B. Bartholomees assumed command of 2nd Battalion, 75th Ranger Regiment from Col. Gregory K. Anderson, July 24 at Watkins Field, Joint Base Lewis-McChord, he inherited a unit with a long and proud fighting history. The 2nd Ranger Battalion is the second of three elite special operations commando battalions belonging to the Army's 75th Ranger Regiment. Guests huddled together and waited for rain as events of the battalion were related.

World War II brought about a need for special units and, along with the 5th Ranger Battalion, was quickly formed at Camp Forrest, Tenn. Only the best soldiers are chosen for special commando units and the 2nd Ranger Battalion felt like the best of the best when they were trained and sent to Great Britain to prepare for the D-Day invasion. Six Ranger battalions were eventually formed during the war.

Lt. Col. James Rudder attempted to land three companies of the 2nd Ranger Battalion at Pointe du Hoc during the invasion. Nothing goes as planned, especially during war, and several landing craft capsized drowning soldiers and losing supplies. Any chance at surprise was lost when the remaining unit landed an hour late. Undeterred, the remaining 190 men scaled rope ladders and completed their mission by disabling a battery of captured French artillery used by the Germans and pointed at Utah Beach. The cost, however, was high and only 90 soldiers were able to continue the fight and held off German counter-attacks for three days. After being brought to strength, the battalion continued to fight in the Hurtgen Forrest and led the assault on Hill 400 at Bergstein.

>>> Col. Gregory K. Anderson and Col. James B. Bartholomees watch over the 2-75th Ranger Regiment change of command ceremony at Watkins Field, JBLM, July 24. Photo credit: Richard Baker

The 2nd Battalion was reactivated as an elite combat unit at Joint Base lewis-McChord Oct. 1, 1974 and considered "world-wide deployable" by the Chief of Staff of the Army. In 19 deployments to Iraq and Afghanistan, they have conducted more than 3,500 raids against the Taliban and al-Qaeda. One company is always available for deployment within 18 hours, the remainder within a day.

For Lt. Col. Bartholomees, the change of command is almost like a homecoming. He served with the regiment as a rifle platoon leader, as the battalion logistics officer, and ranger rifle company commander. He was later assigned as the battalion liaison officer followed by executive officer. After moving to regimental headquarters he served as senior liaison officer, operations officer, executive officer, and regimental deputy commander. Many men know and respect him as an honest, intelligent, and fair commander. He returns that respect.

>>> Col. Gregory K. Anderson salutes the 2-75th Ranger Regiment during the change of command ceremony at Watkins Field, JBLM, July 24. Photo credit: Richard Baker

On three occasions, outgoing commander Col. Anderson deployed three times with the unit to Afghanistan. He will continue his military career by attending the U.S. Army War College before commanding the 173rd Airborne Brigade in Vicenza, Italy.

During the ceremony, the band sparkled, the troops looked smart, and even the rain held back out of respect for one of the finest fighting units in the military. At the completion of the ceremony, the sky broke apart and the sun shone through. No change of command has been better orchestrated.