MONDAY, DEC. 22 2014 >>>

1. If you want to see an entertaining winter play - but are going to puke nutcrackers if you see A Christmas Carol one more time - head to a special early edition of Creative Colloquy at 7 p.m. in B Sharp Coffee House. Michael Haeflinger, Titus Burley and William Turbyfill will perform jolly dramatic performances. Santa will read stories, as will local scribes Burley, Ellen Miffitt and Jennevieve Schlemmer. This CC will include the usual open mic opportunities, as well as special CC stocking stuffer zines created by Nearsighted Narwhal on Tacoma's Sixth Avenue. Yes, this is the yuletide spectacular we've been praying to Winston Churchill for.

2. The moths are on to something. Lights are awesome. Especially holiday lights. Make tonight the night you check out Zoolights or Fantasy Lights - both South Sound institutions. Zoolights, the Point Defiance Zoo and Aquarium's holiday light show and extravaganza, offers a stroll through more than half a million lights, crafted whimsically throughout the zoo from 5-9 p.m. Take a driving tour of Fantasy Lights in Spanaway Park, where carloads of travelers can see more than 300 stunning displays of lights and imaginative animation over a two-mile stretch of Spanaway Lake Park from 5:30-9 p.m. Tune in to a special holiday radio station for a little holiday music to add to the mood. A Monday evening would be a nice time to take the family out and see some bright shiny things.

3. Bert Wilson was one of the underground legends of the jazz world - and he lived in Olympia. He was a survivor of polio in the 1940s (although it has left him confined to a wheelchair), the New York jazz scene of the mid-1960s, and the California underground of the 1970s. At 8 p.m. in Rhythm and Rye, Nancy Curtis, Michael Moore, Michael Olson, Steve Luceno, Steve Bentley and Jim Pribbenow will re-birth the music of the late Bert Wilson. Righteous.

4. Since the beginning of time, The Swiss has hosted live blues every Monday at 8 p.m. Factor in the free pool on Mondays and guitar legend Brian Lee Trio on the stage, and you have yourself a night.

5. Every Monday at 9 p.m. Jazzbones is packed to the brim with party types who swarm the bar and dance to Rockaraoke - live band karaoke. The Rockaraoke band is skilled, too. Tonight, the first 200 people through the door will receive a free custom printed Jazzbones Santa Hat. Bad Santa will be in the house along with Pro Photo booth plus $1 beers and no cover.

LINK: Monday, Dec. 22 arts and entertainment events in the greater Tacoma and Olympia area

Dixie Highway. Remember those words. You may already know them, but in a year you'll know them better. At the bluegrass family picnic, Dixie Highway is the loud and brash kid brother, the noisy upstart from down south who would just as soon stand on your sandwich and scream into your face as slink quietly back from whence he came - deep in the woods, behind the still.

Last night was no picnic. As 20 police cars chased bad guys past the Franciscan Polar Plaza ice-skating rink on Pacific Avenue in downtown Tacoma, Dixie Highway ripped through songs from The Barleywine Revue's repertoire and Forest Beutel's new CD, If You Label Me, You Negate Me. There were several times during Dixie Highway's two riveting sets at the rink when you had to remind yourself that this was only half and not a full-throttle Barleywine Revue. As a duo, Forest Beutel on banjo and Julie Campbell on fiddle - half of the Revue - craft some of the finest bluegrass around. Unfortunately, Forest and Julie don't book many gigs around the Sound, so here's hoping this duo gets the exposure they deserve.

Dixie Highway performed "Good Ol' Boy" off Forest Beutel's CD, which I sort of captured on video.

The word on the street is this year's Polar Plaza numbers will beat previously year's totals. Last night, the rink was packed with young and old - and a whole bunch in the middle as the photos below show.

The Franciscan Polar Plaza ice rink at Tollefson Plaza is open to public ice-skating sessions across the street from the Tacoma Art Museum daily through Jan. 11.

The Weekly Volcano presents Rhythm & Ice: Down Home Holiday Hoedown every Saturday night from 7-9 p.m. at Polar Plaza. Saturday, Dec. 27, banjo musician Forest Beutel tells his other bands - The Rusty Cleavers, The Barleywine Revue and new favorite band Dixie Highway - to take a flying leap as he's performing solo at the ice rink. Ice skate in front of Beutel and show him your new clothes you scored for Christmas. In the meantime, enjoy a few photos and a video (above) from Dixie Highway live at Polar Plaza Dec. 20.

SEE ALSO

Words, photos and video from The Rusty Cleavers' live performance at Polar Plaza

Words, photos and video from Shotgun Kitchen's live performance at Polar Plaza

Words, photos and video from SweetKiss Momma's live performance at Polar Plaza

Words, photos and a video from The Cottonwood Cutups' live performance at the Polar Plaza ice rink

The backstory and band schedule for the Weekly Volcano's Rhythm & Ice music series at the Franciscan Polar Plaza ice rink

SUNDAY, DEC. 21 2014 >>>

1. You can bet the CD Woodbury Band will be celebrating at 7 p.m. in The Spar. Sure, the blues band is down with the holiday spirit, but more importantly, they are about a month away from the International Blues Challenge in Memphis. The band won the South Sound Blues Association's "Back to Beale Street Competition," which means the Tacoma-based organization is sending them to Tennessee to compete with blues bands around the nation. Our fingers are crossed the band's eclectic array of originals and obscure "gem" covers encompassing roots, blues,rock, old school R&B, funk, jazz, jump swing and Americana - all flavored with the spirit of Jam Band improvisation - will blow the judges' minds. In the meantime, indulge in great blues and tasty brews tonight.

2. A Winter Solstice Parade will be held in Tacoma's Sixth Avenue neighborhood today. It's doubtful the druid and pagan communities will be out in full force, dressed in magnificent costumes and singing incantations while waving luminous willow lanterns. No, this parade is a staggering affair between The Red Hot's Darkest Day and Engine House No. 9's 2014 Snow Cru release party. There are many ways to celebrate the solstice, but only the souls at The Red Hot and Engine House No. 9 could, by chance, create an observance loaded with symbolism, and robust, full-bodied beers with rich color and flavor. For complete details, click here.

3. Franciscan Polar Plaza is the place to be once winter hits. Think you can find something better to do than busting out some ice skates? Yeah, good luck with that. Polar Plaza is on its fourth year of setting up an ice-skating rink decked out in wintery goodness at Tollefson Plaza, just across from the Tacoma Art Museum in downtown Tacoma. With three fabulous years behind them, the Plaza folks put their heads together and found a few key ways to make this ritzy rink even better for 2014. Skate from 10 a.m. to 8 p.m.

4. Hello, holiday tradition! The Nutcracker ballet performance is a holiday forever classic. The Tacoma City Ballet does it up right and with a delightful twist. Did you know that there's a "prequel" to The Nutcracker called Tale of the Hard Nut? Celebrating its 31st performance season, the ballet company takes on The Nutcracker performance in its entirety, which includes the prequel. In short: prepare to be dazzled, delighted and enchanted at 3 p.m. in the Pantages Theater.

5. Remember that time in high school when your parents went away? You know, plot line of every teenage movie ever made - except this time, you blew up the house. Standing in the ashes as your parents roll up, what do you do? Say it with us now -iiiiiimprovise. Take notes at 8 p.m. in the Tacoma Comedy Club when male and female comedians battle with improv and sketch skills.

LINK: Sunday, Dec. 21 arts and entertainment events in the greater Tacoma and Olympia area

SATURDAY, DEC. 20 2014 >>>

1. Well, hidee, thar! The Tacoma Art Museum put theyselves up a big ole ice skatin' rink over at Tollefson Plaza called Polar Plaza. It's finer'n a can o' snuff, with all them little 'uns jess skatin' roun' in circles. Shoot, they's prolly ketchin' their death o' colds, but they's grinnin' like a mule eatin' briars. The Weekly Volcano has put together a bluegrass show fer the skatin ‘rink from 7-9 p.m. With Dixie Highway, the fiddle and banjo dance together to create a sound that harkens the spirit of down home Americana. Whether they are playing a barn dance or an ice-skating rink, Dixie Highway will have you on your feet, unless you slip on the ice.

2. Maybe you are done shopping for discount TVs or maybe you've just got better things to do on a Saturday than join the masses at the mall. Whatever the case, Urban Shopping & Cocktails is a breath of fresh air. Every third Saturday from 2-6 p.m., Christy Reedy of Libertine Tacoma, provides a local shopping experience inside her house on Sprague Avenue. Check that. Reedy and rock star Jensen Charnell open up their house, as he is pouring drinks from the kitchen(!). In addition to Reedy's interesting and eclectic variety of artisan salts and salt blends, other local vendors include Shroom Brothers wearable works of art, EarthNerd works, Caps "N' Scraps upcycled creations, Singe and Pepper Pot Polish candles and nail polish line and Leah Marie's jewelry - served up in an intimate space ... with refreshments.

3. The Fabulous Downey Brothers are aggressively, endearingly strange. Half performance art, half spiky art-rock, the Olympia band always bring a surging current of off-putting energy to their live performances. Calling on the daring New Wave of late '70s/early '80s groups like Talking Heads, Devo, and Adam Ant, the Fabulous Downey Brothers clothe their jumpy music in bizarre costumes and jerky dance moves. Usually, the band members wear what looks like cut out pieces of shag carpeting molded into geometric shapes around their heads, making them resemble a sort of warped children's band. This show will also feature a rare performance from the video game-obsessed, pop-punk-worshipping Cutwinkles, who always bring a goofy vibe to their live set. Also, there will be a band called Jurassic Twat, and how great is that? See it all at 9 p.m. in Half Pint Pizza Pub.

4. Like Nick Lowe and Elvis Costello, Trees and Timber have a knack for writing perfect pop songs that don't get just get by on production sheen. There's a tactile feel to Trees and Timber that lends weight to songs that are otherwise light as a feather. On their new LP, Hello, My Name is Love, their '70s AM pop-indebted songs skate by like long-lost favorites. The bouncy, piano-led opener of "Wolf & Sheep" is an ideal lead-in for an album full of music that sounds like it's been played for years, while simultaneously sounding fresh enough to stick in your brain for long after your first listen. It's not easy to record an album that feels like it's assembled entirely out of singles. Read Rev. Adam McKinney's full feature on Trees and Timber in the Music & Culture section, then catch the band with The Jilly Rizzo at 9 p.m. at The Valley.

5. Heretic The Heathen aka Colin McGee aka the leader of the south Puget Sound battle scene (For MCs By MCs) hosts his annual at 9 p.m. in the 4th Ave Tavern in downtown Olympia. The Olympia holiday/birthday hip-hop extravaganza will include performances from QP, AKA featuring Maya Terry, Zikki, Drumatic, Miz and Akeem. Oh, yeah ... the party will include a live lyrical roast of Heretic. Nice. All proceeds to Olympia charities.

LINK: Saturday, Dec. 20 arts and entertainment events in the greater Tacoma and Olympia area

FRIDAY, DEC. 19 2014 >>>

1. The winter holidays' bells, lights and trees are upon us, and along with them the holiday-themed shows. Nutcrackers and Christmas Carols of various stripes are rife and often beloved, but alternatives are out there, too. This week we look to Geoffrey Castle's Celtic Christmas Celebration, an all-ages, revue-style ensemble show put on by legendary violinist Geoffrey Castle at 8 p.m. in the Temple Theatre. Helping Castle bring the magic is a cast of renowned musicians and dancers, including Beth Quist from Cirque du Soleil and the Seattle Irish Dance Company. It's a safe bet Castle's will be performing tunes off his holiday CD, Underhill's Angel: A Treasury of Songs for the Season. It's a safer bet the man in the red suit will be in the house. It's the safest bet the after party will be held across the street at Doyle's Public House.

2. At 28, Stacy Jones had released five CDs, played hundreds of shows and won multiple awards, including Washington Blues Society's "Best Female Vocalist of the Year" in 2010. Her band will play Jazzbones at 8 p.m. Finding a flow of funk, blues, rock and jazz appears to come easy to The Stacy Jones Band. Its presence, talent and raw soul weave seamlessly on stage.

3. Want to drink a Cozy Sweater while wearing an ugly holiday sweater? Twisted Kilt Irish Pub hosts an ugly sweater party with an emphasis on Iron Horse Brewery beers, including Irish Death, Mocha Dream and said sweater. Expect a DJ spinning and giveaways, beginning at 9 p.m.

4. Rhythm and Rye club in downtown Olympia has launched a new monthly series called Northwest Women in Rock. Held every three months, R&R will be featuring talented women who can rock your pants off. The first showcase, at 9 p.m., will feature Alison Marie Baker, Dr. Luna, Grace Hansmeier with her band Solar Sin and rock and roll band John's Daughter.

5. Bam! - Tacoma's first cover band super group - will perform at 9 p.m. at The Swiss. We have no idea what that means, but EXCITING!

LINK: Friday, Dec. 19 arts and entertainment events in the greater Tacoma and Olympia area

THURSDAY, DEC. 18 2014 >>>

1. Can you smell it? Holiday shopping panic. (You smug bastards who already finished your shopping can just keep it to yourselves. No one wants to hear how organized and on top of things you are.) But panicking doesn't help; it just makes you drink more and understand why suicide rates go up around the holidays, and no one wants that. What you need is a little break. A third Thursday hits this week, which means the Tacoma Art Bus will hit the streets of Tacoma, toting around art enthusiasts to art shows in galleries, spaces and businesses - away from the gridlock and parking nightmares. And, most likely, you'll happen upon that perfect gift for picky-ass Aunt Edna whose good side you're trying to get on for inheritance reasons. Holiday ugly sweaters are encouraged, awesome Puget Sound Pizza will provide pizza and the tour begins at 5:45 p.m. in front of the Tacoma Elf Storage.

2. Spaceworks Tacoma partnered with property owners Jori Adkins and Rick Semple to help launch a collective of furniture makers - REVIVE, locally crafted custom furniture close to the Tacoma Dome. The beautiful 2,500 square foot showroom, right on the corner of Puyallup and D Streets, is a perfect fit along "Furniture Row." The five businesses are: Alchemy Concrete, birdloft, reply Furniture, Spring Fever Upholstery and Wane + Flitch. The grand opening is from 5-9 p.m.

3. Ho, ho, hold up - where's your ugly holiday sweater? Don't show up to Tacoma Runners Ugly Sweater Run tonight without one, because some sort of ugliness - be it a deck-the-halls display or a simple Santa face - is mandatory. The event will kick off with a 6:30 p.m. check-in at Slappy's Garage - North End Tavern. The Christmasy 3-mile run will wind through Tacoma's northend, with the runners returning to Slappy's to toss back a bunch of drinkies. You've finally got a use for that reindeer sweater grandma knitted you, so Febreeze off the mothball odor and come run around the Proctor District to spread some Christmas cheer.

4. Bruce Pavitt helped put the Pacific Northwest on the music map in the 1980s with his record label, Sub Pop, with business partner Jonathan Poneman. Pavitt has written a book about his experience at Sub Pop. He will talk about and read from that that book, SUB POP U.S.A.: The Subterranean Pop Music Anthology, 1980-1988, at 7:30 p.m. in the Olympia Timberland Library. K Records founder Calvin Johnson, a.k.a. Selector Dub Narcotic, will DJ 45s following the reading and book signing. This program will occur after regular library hours and no other library services will be available. 

5. As the son of longtime Seattle DJ Bob Rivers, Andrew Rivers got accustomed early to the not-always-flattering spotlight. "I was the butt of so many jokes on the radio show," he says. Maybe that's why - despite his jokes about how he's not tough enough to walk those female friends to their cars - Rivers seems to have a pretty thick skin. Catch him tonight with local comedian Nate Jackson at 8 p.m. in Little Creek Casino in Shelton.

LINK: Thursday, Dec. 17 arts and entertainment events in the greater Tacoma and Olympia area

WEDNESDAY, DEC. 17 2014 >>>

1. The creatures in Walking With Dinosaurs - The Arena Spectacular are so lifelike, it's easy for young viewers to imagine John Hammond and those mad scientists at InGen have been at it for real. But these aren't the modified movie monsters of Jurassic Park, these are puppets and animatronic actors that have been updated to keep pace with scientific discoveries. Instead of shooting 'roids into a featherless Deinonychus and calling it a Velociraptor, this 7 p.m. show in the Tacoma Dome gives us the ostrich-like (but still predatory) Utahraptor. In lieu of Tyrannosaurus duking it out with Stegosaurus - two species separated by almost 90 million years - Walking With Dinosaurs pits the plated herbivore against its contemporary foe, Allosaurus. The aim here is to educate as much as to entertain, so kids get a better idea how dinosaurs actually lived and died. They may even grasp paleontologists' current view of present-day birds as the direct descendants of Mesozoic dinosaurs. Yeah, that's right, folks: Big Bird has more in common with Grumpy from Land of the Lost than he does with Mr. Snuffleupagus.

2. The second annual Cheers to Winter Beers event takes place at 6 p.m. in the Puyallup River Alehouse. Here's the deliciousness owner Eric Akeson has planned for patrons: 10 Barrel Pray For Snow, Alaskan Winter, Elysian Bifrost, Widmer Brrr, Redhook Winterhook, Anderson Valley Winter Solstice, Naked City Potlatch Smoked Maple Brown Ale, The Lost Abbey Merry Taj Christmas IPA, Puyallup River Old Pioneer Winter Ale and others. "Our 2014 Old Pioneer Winter Ale is a new recipe for this year," says Akeson. "Last year we brewed a malt-forward Amber Ale with vanilla beans and lavender. This year, we're brewing an Imperial Red IPA-style beer, with a big dry hop that all the hop heads are going to love." Santa will arrive at 7 p.m.

3. The Olympia Aloha Ukulele Pu'ukani Holiday Concert will be at 6:30 p.m. in the Lacey Timberland Library. Expect songs about Christmas luaus, decorating the palm trees and Santa arriving in a red canoe.

4. Don't let these dark days get you down, mio amico. Hop in the Christmas Revels' time machine, journey to the Renaissance, and bask in Salerno's bright, cheerful courtyard at 7:30 p.m. in the Rialto Theater. Let a troupe of commedia artists and musicians put a smile on your face. Sing along with a pub song. Wipe away tears from a lush Pater Noster, and kick up your heels to "Madama Doré," a lively canzo a ballo (wedding dance). Have some cocoa. Feel the feels. It's what England's Master of Revels would want.

5. The 7th Annual Sagittarius Celebration features a who's who of dope DJs from the South Sound, including DJ Iceman (Brooklyn), DJ Drastic (Atlanta), Kid One (San Diego), DJ Poison (Kingston, Jamaica) and a surprise visit from Tacoma's main soundbwoy, DJ Qualifi, who rocks reggae/roots/dancehall at Champions in Lakewood every Saturday. It launches at 9 p.m. in Sampan Restaurant.

LINK: Wednesday, Dec. 17 arts and entertainment events in the greater Tacoma and Olympia area

TUESDAY, DEC. 16 2014 >>>

1. Everything has been coming up Stephen Hawking this year. The physicist was a guest vocalist on Pink Floyd's latest album, and the story of his life, The Theory of Everything, is the Oscar bait the world needs, not the one it deserves. In conjunction with his biopic playing at The Grand Cinema, the theater has decided to screen the 1991 Hawking documentary, A Brief History of Time, for its Tuesday Film Series. Directed by the great documentarian Errol Morris, the film is an exploration of the man and his work, with presumably a little more accuracy than The Theory of Everything. It screens at 2 and 6:45 p.m., with the later one followed by a discussion of both the documentary and the biopic. The discussion will be led by ... David Gilmour? It can't possibly be that David Gilmour, but you never know. Stephen Hawking and Pink Floyd are apparently tight.

2. Take a mid-day break, bring your lunch and enjoy a merry mini-concert with Tumwater High School's premier vocal ensemble, The Noteables, at noon in the Tumwater Timberland Library. The group will perform, a capella, a variety of traditional and jazz-infused holiday selections. Holiday treats and beverages will be provided by the Friends of the Tumwater Timberland Library.

3. Franciscan Polar Plaza is the place to be once winter hits. Think you can find something better to do than busting out some ice skates? Yeah, good luck with that. Polar Plaza is on its fourth year of setting up an ice-skating rink decked out in wintery goodness at Tollefson Plaza, just across from the Tacoma Art Museum in downtown Tacoma. With three fabulous years behind them, the Plaza folks put their heads together and found a few key ways to make this ritzy rink even better for 2014. Skate from 4-9 p.m. today.

4. Don't let these dark days get you down, mio amico. Hop in the Christmas Revels' time machine, journey to the Renaissance, and bask in Salerno's bright, cheerful courtyard at 7:30 p.m. in the Rialto Theater. Let a troupe of commedia artists and musicians put a smile on your face. Sing along with a pub song. Wipe away tears from a lush Pater Noster, and kick up your heels to "Madama Doré," a lively canzo a ballo (wedding dance). Have some cocoa. Feel the feels. It's what England's Master of Revels would want.

5. Roald Dahl's 1964 kid-lit classic Charlie and the Chocolate Factory is a dose of moral entertainment packed with enough flights of fancy for a dozen books. Hook up with the Banned Book Club and discuss this book at 7 p.m. in Doyle's Public House, as well as the unearthed missing chapter that discuss the kids finding a room marked Vanilla Fudge, which contains a five-story mountain of the sweet stuff. After frolicking on and around the mountain, it comes time, once again, for some kids to be assholes, resulting in them being whisked off to the chopping and smashing room, which is pretty harsh, even for Dahl.

LINK: Tuesday, Dec. 16 arts and entertainment events in the greater Tacoma and Olympia area

Dwarves of Erebor, this is Nerd Alert, the Weekly Volcano's recurring events calendar devoted to all things nerdy. I myself am a Star Wars fan, mathlete, and spelling bee champion of long standing, so trust me: I grok whereof I speak.

With The Hobbit: The Battle of the Five Armies cutting Peter Jackson & Co. loose at long last to work on non-Tolkien projects, this holiday movie season arrives with a vengeance. That's awesome, too, because there's squat-all to watch on TV.

FRIDAY, DEC. 19

If ever I loved the musical Annie, and I'm not sure ever I did, a summer working as a publicist next door to six weeks of "It's the Hard Knock Life" rehearsals drummed it out of me. Still, even I find myself aghast at what Columbia Pictures and director Will Gluck (Friends with Benefits) have done with the popular property. Oh, don't get me wrong, I'm thrilled Jamie Foxx and Quvenzhané Wallis are playing Daddy Warbucks and Little Orphan Annie, respectively, but who thought Cameron Diaz would make a great Miss Hannigan? And isn't Annie famously the story of a little girl struggling through the Great Depression? Why is this movie set in the present day?

On the other hand, what're ya gonna do, buy a ticket to Night at the Museum: Secret of the Tomb instead? Ha! As if! Oh, I crack myself up. But let's be serious for a moment: perhaps now would be a great time to tuck into a fun weekend read! Say, have I mentioned I'm an author?

THURSDAY, DEC. 25

Gentle Reader, I'm confused. (This happens oftener than I'd like to admit.) Specifically, I'm at a loss to comprehend this year's holiday movie releases. In past years, the last two weeks of December saw major prestige releases roll out in the last possible qualifying moments for Oscar consideration. This year, only one serious contender for Best Picture, Angelina Jolie's epic wartime drama Unbroken, premieres Christmas Day. It's the story of Louis Zamperini, an Olympic athlete who ran a 4:08 mile, then served as a bombardier in the Pacific theater before getting shot down by the Japanese. Zamperini survived 47 days on a life raft at sea before reaching the Marshall Islands, only to find himself captured and tormented for months. It's an amazing, true-life story, one richly deserving of cinematic enshrinement.

Unbroken debuts alongside Big Eyes, a Tim Burton biopic about shy Tennessee artist Margaret Keane. Keane's paintings of mutant children were everywhere in the 1950s, but her self-aggrandizing husband Walter became a national celebrity by claiming he painted all of them. The movie stars Amy Adams and Christoph Waltz, two actors who've earned multiple nominations over the years and may well coast into awards consideration again. The film itself, however, is having a tough time gathering buzz.

Also opening on Christmas - not that its ubiquitous commercials and trailers have kept this a secret - is Disney's adaptation of Stephen Sondheim's Into the Woods. If you've ever attended a live musical theater production, this was probably it. In the last few years I've seen two local productions, and passed on seeing yet another at the Oregon Shakespeare Festival. Early reports suggest the movie (directed by Chicago's Rob Marshall, who should know better) takes liberties with the musical we all know and respect. Sound familiar? Among other changes, it dispenses with the narrator altogether. I wish I could be more optimistic, especially given Woods' undeniably talented cast, but unless the trailers have vastly undersold it I think you may be happier driving to Ashland instead.

Ed. note: Sony pulled the release of The Interview after theaters refused to screen the film due to death threats from the Sony hackers.

One final movie opening Dec. 25 worth mentioning, if only for the damage it may have inspired, is Sony's The Interview. It stars James Franco and Seth Rogen as clueless TV personalities who are commissioned to kill North Korea's "Supreme Leader," Kim Jong-un. Of course, Kim Jong-un is a real person, known more for his purges, human rights violations and nuclear threats than his sense of self-deprecating humor, so this did not go unnoticed. No, it appears Kim got his supreme panties in a bunch about it, a reaction, perhaps, to his father's merciless savaging at the hands of Team America: World Police. Coincidentally or probably not, hackers invaded Sony's corporate network and leaked hundreds of damaging emails, including an exchange in which Sony co-chairman Amy Pascal called Angelina Jolie "a minimally talented spoiled brat." Ooh, or maybe you heard the one about how Sony was planning to sue Bill Murray for declining to costar in Ghostbusters 3? Yeah, this has not been a fun week on the Sony lot, and I have every reason to believe it will not get better soon.

Until next week, may the Force be with you, may the odds be ever in your favor, and may God bless Bill Murray, amen.

MONDAY, DEC. 15 2014 >>>

1. We like Travis Champ for the same reason we like fried pickles, Schlitz in a bottle and all breeds of big dogs - they're all good things that come without an ounce of pretense or posing. Poet Champ came into some Oregon coastal notoriety with his poetry collection, Old Nehalem Road. He set his poems of boyhood memory, baseball and the fate of boys to war to song, inhabiting a masculine world, one that is shared artfully through old school country style. Champ's hooks and emotive guitar chords are set against his semi-monotone, yet smooth and resonant vocals. James Owen Greenan's drums offer crisp rhythms even in the slower paced songs. Jon Feeder's bass release tasty melodic bass interludes. Together, they are The Cedar Shakes, performing an old time Americana sound with a punkish flair. Catch the band at 10 p.m. in Le Voyeur.

2. Franciscan Polar Plaza is the place to be once winter hits. Think you can find something better to do than busting out some ice skates? Yeah, good luck with that. Polar Plaza is on its fourth year of setting up an ice-skating rink decked out in wintery goodness at Tollefson Plaza, just across from the Tacoma Art Museum in downtown Tacoma. With three fabulous years behind them, the Plaza folks put their heads together and found a few key ways to make this ritzy rink even better for 2014. Skate from 4-9 p.m. today.

3. Drawn from a vast custom library, the Olympia Jazz Senators perform a full range of big band jazz. You might hear an authentic Glen Miller dance tune straight from World War II, followed by Count Basie, Stan Kenton, Buddy Rich or a cutting-edge new composition by one of the Senators. Catch the big band at 8 p.m. in Rhythm & Rye.

4. Born in Chicago in 1955, Jay Mabin's musical influences began at an early age when he was exposed to a wide variety of jazz and blues both at home and at numerous coffee houses and concert stages in the Northwest. When Mabin turned 14 he had the opportunity to perform with the legendary blues duo Sonny Terry and Brownie McGee. Terry became his mentor and showed him the basics of the blues. Jay also studied with jazz greats Toots Thielemans and Howard Levy whose revolutionary systems of harmonics for the harmonica has given Mabin the tools to create one of the truly original voices in jazz harmonica. Catch him with The Blues Perpetrators at 8 p.m. in The Swiss.

5. Rockaraoke at Jazzbones will either be your novel opportunity to act as frontman, or be completely intimidating. Perpetually packed with people, Rockaraoke boasts a unique twist for karaoke in Tacoma: instead of a backing track, you get a three-piece band playing behind you. Check it out at 9 p.m.

LINK: Monday, Dec. 15 arts and entertainment events in the greater Tacoma and Olympia area