FREE EVENTS IN THE SOUTH SOUND NOV. 28-DEC. 3 >>>

Oh man, Bobble Tiki loves outer space, UFOs, lizard people from the 5th Dimension walking among us and everything X-Files. Many times Bobble Tiki has hopped around the Arizona desert, searching for clues and bunkers and spacecraft wreckage and secret codes written on tablets of transparent zirconium. And look! Northwest expert James Clarkson is lecturing this week. Righteous. In his honor, Bobble Tiki presents a week of free outer-space-ISH events in happening in the South Sound.

MONDAY, NOV. 28: Every Monday DJ Melodica spins punk, post punk, New Wave and early electronica tunes during Micro Mondays at Magoo's Annex in Tacoma. Bobble Tiki can only assume Melodica will spin "space" music by Aphex Twins, Thomas Dolby, Enigma, Brian Eno, Peter Gabriel, and, of course, "Space Age Love Song." The free music begins at 8:30 p.m.

TUESDAY, NOV. 29: Once Sold Tales Bookstore Outlet in Kent allows those 18 and younger to take home free five books from 60,000 titles from 10 a.m. to 9 p.m. as a way to encourage reading in the next generation. Bobble Tiki expects The Magic School Bus Lost in the Solar System, The Sky Is Full of Stars, Binky The Space Cat, Captain Underpants and the Invasion of the Incredibly Naughty Cafeteria Ladies from Outer Space and Colonization Of Psychic Space: A Psychoanalytic Social Theory Of Oppression and to be among the choices.

WEDNESDAY, NOV. 30: Yes! James Clarkson, a career investigator and UFOlogist will discuss cases of unidentified flying objects in the Northwest and ideas on the nature of non-human intelligence for free at 7:30 p.m. inside the Olympia Timberland Library. Is anyone else suddenly picturing Gillian Anderson in a black dress with a white duster?

THURSDAY, DEC. 1: This might be stretching this week's theme but Bobble Tiki believes mediation is an attempt to build on your inner consciousness so that you have an enhanced awareness of both your valid existence and your rightful relationship to the infinite cosmos. At 7 p.m. inside The Nalanda Institute Dharma Center in Olympia, a free class will be held on "Contemplative Science, Dharma Practice from a Research Perspective," These teachings are based on recent collaborative research studies between Buddhist scholars/meditators and western researchers.

FRIDAY, DEC. 2: Space is the place. The Future Bass maestros of intelligent electronica descend upon the Tempest Lounge for a cover-free night so intense that mere dancing is not sufficient. DJs BROAM, Bobby Galaxy and Sound Selector E.S. present the latest and future of electronic music while immersed in a lush environment of projected video and live visuals. The spaceship takes off at 9:30 p.m.

SATURDAY, DEC. 3: As Hollywood's bottomless recycling bin continues along the dark path of rebooting, relaunching, CGI-ing and 3D-ing an entire generation of young executives' childhood memories into franchise-ready properties, Jim Henson's iconic creations have hit recently returned to the big screen with The Muppets. In celebration the Lakewood Pierce County Library will celebrate The Muppets with Muppet movies, including Muppets From Space, beginning at 1:30 p.m.

LINK: More arts and entertainment events in the South Sound

LINK: 2011 South Sound Holiday Happenings

SATURDAY, NOV. 26, 2011 >>>

1. Every time a snowboard movie arrives at a snowboard shop, wrenches hit the concrete, open signs are flipped over and couches are pushed together.  Tonight, Northwest Snowboards takes that mindset a notch higher with a night of snowboard and skateboard flicks - including TB20 and Absinthe's Twel2ve - on the Capitol Theater screen beginning at 7 p.m.  

2. Is it us or is the shopping local movement gaining tremendous speed. Now we have Small Business Saturday. The national campaign encourages shoppers to favor the locally owned businesses that are often the soul of their communities. Of course all area small businesses are down for this today, including A Rhapsody In Bloom Florist & Cafe Latte on Sixth Avenue. Besides offering new merchandise and sale pricess, the small business will shell out complimentary 8-oz. eggnog, mocha or vanilla lattes and hot ciders. Nice.

3. Wine Bank and Beer Vault celebrates its sixth anniversary with a wine tasting and special sale pricing from 2-4:30 p.m.

4. The Weekly Volcano applauds those responsible for the Bicycle Booze Cruz for further synthesizing these two activities: exercise and drinking. This particular cruise called Turkicanus Bicyclette will launch from Magoo's Annex at 7 p.m. - rain or shine – in honor of one of our more subtly bizarre holidays, Thanksgiving. Riders are encouraged to dress up however they see fit, as they bike from bar to bar, all over Tacoma. Of course, biking and drinking aren't quite a match made in heaven, so ride at your own risk.

5. Throughout the month of November brave men have been attempting to eradicate cancer by growing mustaches (thus raising awareness, which is fatal to cancer). The movement is called Movember. Stonegate Pizza on South Tacoma Way is down, hosting a mustache party tonight, which will benefit friends Tiffany and Jimmy with medical expenses to fight cancer. Admission is $5 suggested donation AND a mustache - real or fake (prizes will be awarded. That means you too ladies. Ture Holland and Brandon Morgan will rock the joint. And there's a raffle, too.

LINK: More arts and entertainment events in the South Sound

LINK: Happy hours!

THE LOWDOWN ON WHAT'S UP THIS WEEKEND >>>

WEATHER REPORT

Friday: Mostly cloudy, hi 44, lo 38

Saturday: Rain, hi 50, lo 43

Sunday: Rain, hi 50, lo 36

>>> FRIDAY, NOV. 25-MONDAY, JAN. 2: FRANCISCAN POLAR PLAZA

How do you escape the pressures of the holidays, like, really quickly? Bundle up, drop your packages in the trunk, pinch your cheeks until they glow and strap on a pair of silver skates, Hans Brinker, for a glide across the frozen expanse at Tollefson Plaza. The Franciscan Polar Plaza, located on the corner of Pacific Avenue and South 17th Street. The covered outdoor rink is about half the size of a hockey rink. It will have real ice and hold about 150 skaters at a time. Oh, if you need a tree, grab one at the neighboring Two Five Trees.

• Tollefson Plaza, opening day Nov. 25 10 a.m. to 10 p.m., through Jan. 2, 4-10 p.m. Monday-Friday, 10 a.m. to 10 p.m. Saturday, 10 a.m. to 8 p.m. Sunday, $8, $1 off active duty military and family, $2 skate rental, Pacific Avenue and South 17th Street, Tacoma, website]

>>> FRIDAY, NOV. 25: ZOOLIGHTS

You're sick and tired of driving through the neighborhood looking at the homes of people who think they deserve an award for their light displays. You deserve to take a night to go see ZooLights. Billed as the region's biggest walk-through light show, ZooLights includes animated light sculptures, live entertainment, snacks, animal encounters, and the Paul Titus Carousel. While enjoying your stroll with a cup of hot chocolate, be thankful you're not in charge of this holiday light display.

• Point Defiance Zoo & Aquarium, through Jan. 1, 5-9 p.m., $7-$8.25, 5400 N. Pearl St., Tacoma, 253.591.5337  

>>> FRIDAY, NOV. 25: LELAVISION

Remember when you used to dress your dolls up and make them act out scenes from Footloose? There they were all lined up on the bed, and G.I. Joe with the Kung Fu grip was causing trouble and Barbie was fighting with Cabbage Patch while their passive-aggressive little stuffed animal children hid their eyes. Yep, you've always been strange. But the point of this is you're still a fan of physical agility and humor. Seattle's Lelavision - the troupe that combines Cirque de Soleil and Stomp, and then adds its own unique vision for a humorous, musical, theatrical and dance performance unlike any other - returns to the Museum of Glass. Catch their "Physical Music" with a Cabbage Patch in your pocket. Freak.

• Museum of Glass, 1 and 3 p.m., $5-$12, 1801 Dock St., Tacoma, 253.396.1768]

>>> SATURDAY, NOV. 26: CHITTY CHITTY BANG BANG

You love the film Chitty Chitty Bang Bang, right? You dressed as the Child Catcher a few years ago for Halloween. Remember? The waitress at Knapp's used to have nightmares about the Child Catcher when she was a kid, and when she saw you in the costume - she freaked. Anyway, you loved Chitty Chitty Bang Bang, and you saw it once a year. That was it. Once a year. Nowadays if you like Chitty Chitty Bang Bang, you buy the DVD, you have it. But not on the big screen. That is, until Saturday. The Broadway Center will screen the flick for you to enjoy. Afterward, the Ghost of Christmas Present will hover as the lights on the Christmas tree outside the Pantages flick on. There will be much rejoicing over hot cocoa and cider, too.

• Pantages Theater, 2 p.m. film, 4:30 p.m. holiday stuff, 6 p.m. tree lighting, $14 film, 901 Broadway, Tacoma, 253.591.5894]

>>> SATURDAY, NOV. 26: GRITTY CITY CRAFT FAIR

If you are looking for a more soulful, local shopping experience after Thanksgiving, may we suggest the Gritty City Gift Fair in downtown Tacoma. Jada-Moon Gridley has created an environment void of frantic zombified credit-carded bodies fighting over pallets of heavily-discounted Vitamix 5200 Ultramax Packages. With community in mind, and live music to soothe, Gridley has hand picked local vendors offering treasures made from green and reclaimed materials, as well as artisan consumables.

• 906 Broadway, Saturday, Nov. 26, 3-9 p.m., free admission, Tacoma, Facebook]

>>> WHAT SOME OF OUR STAFF MEMBERS ARE UP TO 

ALEC CLAYTON Visual Arts Critic
No shopping on Black Friday, but I'll top off the day by going to see Harlequin Productions' Stardust Serenade. Saturday I'm going to check out Lisa Kinoshita's show at Fulcrum.

NIKKI TALOTTA Features Writer
Turkey for the girls and Turkey for the boys / My favorite kind of pants
Are corduroys / Gobble gobble goo and Gobble gobble gickel / I wish turkey
Only cost a nickel / Oh I love turkey on Thanksgiving. Happy Thanksgiving everybody! 

JOANN VARNELL: Theater Critic
After stuffing myself silly and counting all the ways I'm thankful, I
will be attending a bridge lighting in Sumner on Friday, the Broadway
Center tree lighting on Saturday, Peter Pan at Tacoma Musical
Playhouse on Saturday night and HOPEFULLY nothing on Sunday. 

STEVE DUNKELBERGER Meat Market Photographer
Going to Peter Pan at Tacoma Musical Playhouse and Oliver at Lakewood Playhouse. In between, I'll be hitting Netflix like it owes me money.

REV. ADAM MCKINNEY Music Critic
As a matter of fact, I have pretty big plans this weekend, and they all revolve around Friday and Saturday at The New Frontier Lounge. Those days are dedicated to the first fundraisers for the 3rd "Annual" Squeak and Squawk Music Festival, and they feature such ginormous acts as Derek Kelley and the Speedwobbles, I Will Keep Your Ghost, and the return of Paris Spleen, among other great acts. Please come down and show your support, get drunk and dance, and help make Squeak and Squawk the awesome festival we know it'll be.

LINK: More arts and entertainment events in the South Sound

LINK: The weekend's freebies

WHAT WE HAVE FOUND TODAY >>>

Let's Look At The Weather: Rain, lots of it, for 40 days and 40 nights. (Wunderground)

Some Of You Can't Reading This Awesomeness: Outages! (News Tribune)

Tacoma School District: There goes the few remaining field trips. (News Tribune)

Nice To Have This Now: Downtown Tacoma rain gardens will filter, not soak. (News Tribune)

Well This Is Just Super: Uncertainty lingers about what the continued fallout will be from the failure of the congressional "super committee" to forge a deficit reduction deal. (CNN)

"Ask About The Measurement Of The Sun": Leonardo da Vinci's To-Do List (NPR)

Is Jay-Z An Illuminati Puppet?: Pop music's strangest conspiracy theories. (Slate)

Anthony Bourdain: Unvarnished opinions, lots of smoking and swearing, and tales of hard living that enhance his travels rather than detracting from them. (AV Club)

Wish It Was On Right Now: Game of Thrones season 2 teaser. (Los Angeles Times)

New Mode: Depeche Mode original members Vince Clarke and Martin L. Gore have announced they will release a series of EPs and a new album under the band name VCMG. (Rolling Stone)

Um: Star Wars theme engagement photos (Geekologie)

Electric Six covers "You're A Mean One, Mr. Grinch"

TUESDAY, NOV. 22, 2011 >>>

1. Tsui Hark's Detective Dee boasts multiple people bursting into flame, a talking stag that also fights, an actual underworld complete with a Charon-like ferryman, people changing their faces via acupuncture, a fight with what looks like a puppet and a shady herbalist named "Dr. Donkey Wang." Nice. The Grand Cinema will screen Detective Dee and the Mystery of the Phantom Flame at 1:40 and 6:10 p.m. as part of its Tuesday Film Series.

2. Tin Man plays an all-ages show at 6 p.m. inside the Mandolin Café. Opening will be the Scarecrow.

3. Sante Fe, New Mexico, is known for its arts and restaurant scene. Some how the Immanuel Presbyterian Church in Tacoma convinced artist Jack McCarthy to leave said paradise in order to give a 7 p.m. lecture on the art of woodcuts, linocuts, monocut printing and handmade bookmaking. We have no idea if he'll reveal the best spots to dine in Sante Fe. It's worth a shot, though.

4. Watercolor artist Susie Short will come clean on her techniques before the Peninsula Art League at 7 p.m. inside the Cottesmore Retirement Center in Gig Harbor.

5. Conductor Edwin Powell will lead pianist Oksana Ejhokina and the Pacific Lutheran University Wind Ensemble in concert at 8 p.m. inside the Lagerquist Concert Hall.

LINK: More arts and entertainment events in the South Sound

LINK: This week's freebies

LINK: Ho! 2011 South Sound Holiday Calendar

NEW WEB SERIES PHOENIX RUN TO BEGIN SHOOTING IN DECEMBER >>>

I think all this gray weather has gotten to some local filmmakers. The stories behind my most recent Buzzes - which I seek out at random every week - all ended up gravitating toward the macabre, like The Resolution's plot of sadistic revenge, or the demon-infested haunted house of Grimises Rising. Both the sun and sunny cinema seem to be on holiday.

But Tacoma's T.J. Walker embraces the dark side of life, and asks us to do the same with his new web series, Phoenix Run, which he will produce and direct. The tale takes place in a grim reality where every human on earth lives infected with an engineered zombie virus (can't you get ONE thing right, science?). So to stay un-undead, people must pay for the services of "vaccine-runners" like Fleet, a main character in the series.

Episodes (each roughly 12 minutes long) will feature landmarks in Tacoma, Gig Harbor and other nearby cities to make the fantasy feel chillingly real. Walker also has plans to fuse local sights with local sound - Run's soundtrack will feature songs from eclectic rockers Death By Stars, whom Volcano music journalist Rev. Adam McKinney recently called "a delirious soup." (With winter nigh I hope it's the audio equivalent of Progresso Chicken Noodle.)

Run moves in a direction not typically traversed in the zombie genre. "This isn't about survivors," Walker tells me. "(The series) works differently. The world keeps going, the world didn't end...we still got Starbucks, there's McDonald's still, people are still going to work ... but everybody's sick."

The 32-year-old graduate of Bates Technical College found inspiration for his concept in the 2006 film Children of Men. The individuals in this similarly bleak dystopia also live with the knowledge of an impending global crisis. Powerless to stop it, they can only cling to their daily routines. With that said, HAPPY THANKSGIVING EVERYONE!!

Walker and his crew will begin shooting Run in December, with the first episode online by February. Find updates in the coming weeks by searching "Phoenix Run" on Facebook and YouTube.

LINK: Listen to Movie Biz Buzz on Volcano Radio, Episode 3

WHAT WE HAVE FOUND TODAY >>>

Seattle Mariners outfielder Greg Halman: Dead. (Seattle Times)

Our Crabbing Season: It's back on! (The Olympian)

Shorelines Master Program Update: The finish line is in sight. (News Tribune)

Debt Panel Fail: A weekend of talks among members of the congressional panel charged with finding $1.2 trillion in budget cuts apparently failed to produce a compromise. (CNN)

Nice: Arrested Development is officially returning in 2013. (USA Today)

Songs For Stuffing: A Thanksgiving Mix. (NPR)

Time Waster: Here all the Beatles songs played at one. (Flavorwire)

True: Darth Vader has asked for a land plot in the Ukrainian Black Sea port of Odessa to park his space ship. (disinformation)

In Case You Need It

ALL FREAKIN' MORNING >>>

All Freakin' Night, Olympia Film Festival's all-night mini-fest of blood-injected spazzmatic anti-cinema (that always causes at least one of our major organs to fail) is just wrapping up.  Soon, the rummy crowd will file out of the Capitol Theater. In year's past, the exhausted All Freakin' Night crowd stood in front of the theater for hours - readjusting to the light, readjusting to what they saw with their naked eyes.

This year, the OFF brain trust has instigated a program to help the AFN audience return to normal life. Beginning at 10 a.m., the Artesian Rumble Arkestra - the large orchestra of musicians specializing in jazz, Balkan brass, Brazilian samba and Bollywood film music - will lead a parade through downtown Olympia ending at The Clipper for pancakes and Bloody Marys. This "Zombie Parade" is appropriate for kids, as cartoons will fill the televisions.

Breakfast will wrap up at 1 p.m. The cost is $6 with proceeds benefiting the Olympia Film Society.

For more information on the Olympia Film Festival and today's film schedule, click here.

LINK: Details on Oly Film Fest's All Freakin' Night show last night are in our Weekend Hustle

For a sneak peek at what the Artesian Rumble Arkestra can do, check the video below.

PUMPIN' IT TO METAL >>>

Henry Rollins's linebacker-like neck, Iggy Pop's negative body fat, Janet Gwen Stefani's midsection, and yes, even Lady Gaga's tight little backside. While these people may be genetically blessed with talent, good looks, and/or self-promotional genius, they have had to work hard to get their bodies into prime condition. Music and fitness go hand in hand - if you think about it, you very rarely see a portly pop star or a chubby club kid. Sure, maybe the cigarettes (and other assorted substances) help keep some of the weight off, but it takes a commitment to exercising to get a really buff bod.

Olympia über creative folks Lisa Hurwitz and Joaquin de la Puente are committed to exercise and want to prove it to the world. This afternoon, inside The Mark, they'll hold a live taping for their aerobics feature OlyAerobics. Local metalheads Vanguard will shred, live, so you may shred off the pounds. That's right. They need you to get physical for the video. Grab your leggings and half-shirts and get ready to rock your rolls off.

BONUS: Before the sweat, Hurwitz will whet your whistle with the world premiere of her new cooking show, Martha and Me.

Locals Workin' It Out is part of the Olympia Film Festival. For more information on OFF, and today's film schedule, go here.

LINK: Details on Oly Film Fest's All Freakin' Night show tonight are in our Weekend Hustle

For a sneak peek at what Hurwitz can do, check the video below.

TONIGHT WILL BE NOTHING LIKE ROSS >>>

Ross: Hey, what have you guys been up to?

Phoebe: Oh! We went to a self-defense class today!

Rachel: Yeah, kicking a guy in the crotch all morning really takes it out of ya!

Joey: Takes it out of you?

Phoebe: Now, we can kick anybody's butt!

Ross: After one class? I don't think so.

Rachel: What? You wanna see me self-defend myself?! Pretend you're a sexual predator! Go on! I dare ya!

Ross: Well, of course you can defend yourself from an attack you know is coming, that's not enough. Look, I studied kara-tay for a long time, and there's a concept you should really be familiar with. It's what the Japanese call unagi.

Rachel: Isn't that a kind of sushi?

Ross: No, it's a concept!

Phoebe: Yeah it is! It is! It's freshwater eel!

Ross: Y'know what? Fine! Get attacked! I don't even care!

Phoebe: Come on Ross. We're sorry. Please tell us what it is.

Ross: Unagi is a state of total awareness. Only by achieving true unagi can you be prepared for any danger that may befall you.

Phoebe: You mean in case someone is trying to steal your bamboo sleeping mat or your kettle of fish?

Ross: All I'm saying is, it's one thing being prepared for an attack against like each other; whole other story being prepared for an attack, I don't know, like a (turns and puts his face close to Rachel's and screams) surprise!

(Rachel calmly wipes the spittle off her face.)

Ross: All right, you knew that one was coming, but that doesn't mean you have unagi.

Rachel: Ooh! Y'know what? If we made reservations, we could have unagi in about a half-hour.

Ridiculous? And then some. The above Friends TV show dialogue demostrates how our society has destroyed the lore of the martial arts. It's an outrage!

Tonight, the Olympia Film Festival will screen REAL martial arts in action when it presents a Wu Tang Kung Fu double feature: The Mystery of Chess Boxing and Bastard Swordsman.

The Mystery of Chess Boxing is the quintessential ‘70s rKung Fu flick: bad dubbing, slapping-tin-pan-fight-sounds, zooming close-ups on the eyes of the villain and some mad eyebrow hair in the bargain.

Bastard Swordsman is a grand spectacle of a film with a wildly romantic plot and supersonic mystical kung fu and swordplay. Love, honor, revenge and non-stop action are all packed into one tight, flashy, 90-minute mini-epic.

Yea, sure. How do you really know when on-screen martial arts action is real? Below are a few signs to pay attention to tonight at the Capitol Theater.

The Kiai:  This is the loud yell you hear kung fu people scream as they break ice, kick down doors or even just enter a room full of thugs. The yell is called a "kiai," but the yell doesn't have to sound that way phonetically.  It could be a "HIYAH," or even a "WHOOPEE." A kiai should be a personal expression of fearsome inner power.  The louder the scream, the better. If you can't kick their butt, maybe you can make them go deaf.

The Fighting Stance:  A pose that says, "Bring it on, sucka!"  This is the basic stance to stay in when fighting.  Just like Jim Carrey in Dumb and Dumber - fists are up, best foot is forward, and the tongue is moving like a dog after downing a jar of Jiffy.

Concentration: Focus is essential. If you take any sort of kung-fu instructional lessons, you'll discover your body can do just about anything you want it to if you concentrate enough. Or you can try not to blink which can pass for concentration. Or psychosis. Either one is OK.

The films screen tonight at 11:30 p.m.(!) at the Capitol Theater. For more information on the Olympia Film Festival, and today's film schedule, go here.

For a sneak peek at The Mystery of Chess Boxing, check the trailer below. Real!