Walkie Talkie Blog
DOWNTOWN TACOMA'S FUJIYA RESTAURANT LAYS IT DOWN FOR JAPANESE RELIEF FUNDS>>> Normally when there's a global disaster Americans come through with the red, white, and blue and donate, donate, donate. As a fellow American, I'm urging you to follow the crowd. But, while you serve your fellow man, why not be served
Walkie Talkie Blog
LADY-BIT PRODUCTS SOLD AT 200 DECIBELS>>> After a late night restaurant shift, I headed home, microwaved a burrito and plopped myself on the couch to watch some good late-night TV. Alright, it was bad late-night TV, but I can't deny myself a 12-hour marathon of TLC's I Didn't Know I was Pregnant. I
Walkie Talkie Blog
FRIDAY (HELL YEAH) VIDEO BREAK>>> My Internet is out at home, so I'm chilling at the Satellite Coffee by the downtown YMCA, where the wheat grass grows high in a planter behind the juicing counter and the baristas are camouflaged with tattoos and talk on their cell phones while they make
Walkie Talkie Blog
FALL IN LOVE OR SNORT COCAINE - IT'S YOUR CHOICE >>> According to Medical News Today, falling in love affects intellectual areas of the brain and triggers the same sensation of euphoria experienced by people when they do cocaine. Researchers from Syracuse University found that when someone falls in love, several
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DON'T BELIEVE EVERY MORMON TALE YOU HEAR FROM A STRANGER ON THE BUS>>> My last Google search? "Mormon wedding penis hole." Before you judge, let me defend myself by saying that I heard once from some guy on a bus that the Mormon wedding ceremony involves the groom's penis being inserted
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SUPER MARIO PRODIGY>>> I used to dream of being a doctor, then a singer, and later in life, a writer for the New York Times. After watching this video, I realize my goals in life haven't been nearly ambitious enough. This guy beat Mario Brothers 3 in less than 11 minutes.
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BIG MUSCULAR MEN DANCING LIKE LITTLE GIRLS>>> You've probably seen the classic "Super Bowl Shuffle." But what you may not have seen are the hilarious spoofs of the video that have been created since the '80s original debuted. There are hundreds of "Shuffle" remakes, but two that take the cake. Please enjoy
Walkie Talkie Blog
HAPPY FRIDAY VIDEO DISTRACTION>>> Don Hertzfeldt is genius. The man creates stickfigure short animated films that make Trey Parker and Matt Stone look like a couple of amateurs. In this video he's compiled a bunch of shorts together, all of which have previously been rejected from network television - probably because
Walkie Talkie Blog
PUT SOME GROUNDHOG IN YOUR MOUTH>>> Happy Grounhog's day! (Yesterday) Because my parents were away for both Thanksgiving and Christmas this year, we are instead having a Groundhog's day family get-together. No joke. I offered my chef step-dad an actual groundhog recipe to incorporate into our feast, and even offered up
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HAPPY YEAR OF THE RABBIT>>> Today marks the first day of the Chinese New Year. I kicked off my celebration by eating a breakfast of two fortune cookies (both which promised me considerable luck between the sheets) and spending a couple hours watching really cheesy videos of Chinese children rapping about
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TACO BELL, WHAT'S THE BEEF?>>> An Alabama law firm is suing Taco Bell for falsely advertising their product as "beef" when allegedly, it contains less than 35% beef and a slew of fillers. I'm not sure anyone can act surprised here. What's shocking is the USDA only requires beef to
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DUCK FACE--SCHMUCK FACE>>> Thank you Mark Zuckerberg for your face-fan-book-tastic social genius. And thank you friends for posting face-fan-drunk-tastic pictures of me without warning or a signed letter of consent. I recently watched the über popular Youtube video, "Duck Face", and was very much encouraged to delete at least a few
Walkie Talkie Blog
WHEN YOU FLUSH THE JOHN, YOU MAY WONDER...WHERE HAS MY POO GONE? >>> Wonder no more. After pinching a loaf, taking the Browns to the Thunder Dome, plopping a deuce, leaving a grumpy in the toolbox--or however your linguistic sensibilities lend themselves to describing the event--you no longer have to sit
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HUMPDAY HILARITY>>> I'm good at a couple of things: making mix tapes, making it to the gym despite a massive hangover (I sweat whiskey droplets on the eliptical and sop them up with a towel, which I wring into my mouth post workout), and finding stupid videos to help you laugh
Walkie Talkie Blog
PLANNED PARENTHOOD INFILTRATED BY WACKO PRO-LIFE EXTREMEISTS >>> The Christian right is at it again. I guess they thought shouting things like "murderer" and "baby killer" at young women as they enter Planned Parenthood, or holding up giant posters of aborted babies on the side of the highway wasn't offensive enough.
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SWING LOW, WRINKLED BAGS>>> Last week two Houston adult entertainment clubs agreed to settle a federal age discrimination case with a 56- year-old former stripper who was fired due to her advanced age. Get this - male managers had the audacity to call her too "old" for the business. The
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BREAKING NEWS: SOME BULLSHIT HAPPENED SOMEWHERE>>> This video needs no introduction, so to fill up space I will write you a poem. Ode To Friday I wait for you like a pizza in the oven that I end up pulling out before the timer rings because i'm hungry and I consume a pound of raw dough without
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FINALLY, WE'RE MAKING DINOSAURS>>> In the past, I've attempted to ressurrect the extinct wooly mammoth, but apparently I lack the power to breath life into an animal constructed out of Legos. Oh well, the scientists beat me to it anyways. According to CNN, the successful cloning of the extinct creature is
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SEAHORSES FOREVER>>> Happy Humpday! Here's a stupid video to help you forget about your TPS reports and Swingline stapler jams. This video was rumored to be from a recording of a dude ripping on acid, stuck in his coat closet. Sorry. The truth is never as interesting. The video was actually
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THE STARS NEVER LIE...STARTING NOW.>>> So, you thought you were a Virgo for the last 27 years of your life. Well, turns out you were wrong, and really only because astrologers have been too lazy to change the placement of astrological signs, apparently inaccurate for the past 3,000 years. According to astrologer