MONDAY, MARCH 24 2014 >>>

1. Weekly Volcano scribe Jackie Fender has created Creative Colloquy aiming to share Tacoma's rich literary talents and foster relationships built upon mutual admiration of the written word. The inaugural Creative Colloquy, which goes down at 7 p.m. at B Sharp Coffee House, encourages scribes to connect with like minds. Short stories and novel excerpts are encouraged but Fender encourages other prose. Each performer will have up to 5 minutes to read. Opportunities are based upon those who arrive and sign up first. Featured storytellers include Joshua Swainston, Melissa Thayer, Nick Stokes, Titus Burley, William Norris Turbyfill and Dick Dorsett. All featured readers have pieces posted on creativecolloquy.com, although their readings could differ from the posted material. Come imbibe in libations or sip on roasted bean concoctions and watch storytellers do the thing they do best - narrate their tales.

2. The Grand Cinema has long been a ground zero of cinematic art in Tacoma, and that title has only grown with the addition of its fourth screen. With that new screen, The Grand Cinema is able to showcase films every Tuesday that would otherwise not be able to sustain a full week run. Here is where the Documentary Week comes in.

3. Sister Spit all-girl spoken word road show drops in on Olympia's Eagles Ballroom at 7:30 p.m. If you’re envisioning a bunch of gray-haired professors reading Dickinson and Shakespeare in low, expressionless tones, drooling, you’ve it wrong. Whew!  This tour features eight, 20-something queer female writers. Expect musical, rhythmic monologues about issues such as class, race, gender and sexuality.

4. Saxophonist Cliff Colon, keyboardist Peter Adams, bassist Rob Hutchinson and drummer Brian Smith are known as Velocity, a jazz fusion and Latin funk band that will bring it at 8 p.m. in The Swiss.

5. Every Monday Jazzbones is packed to the brim with college kids. Party types. The type that wear tight shirts and trucker hats. Throngs of Chad Fratguys and Sarah Sororitysisters swarm the bar, line up for the bathroom and dance to the Rockaraoke - live band karaoke. The Rockaraoke band is skilled, too. Expect $2 PBR drafts, $3 Sinfire shots and $4 Smirnoff flavor vodka bombs.

LINK: Monday, March 24 arts and entertainment events in the greater Tacoma and Olympia area

GRAB A CUP AND READ THE MORNING REPORT FOR 3.24.14 >>>

Ukraine evacuated its troops from Crimea, as Russians stormed a marine base. 

A deepening crisis in Ukraine has sharpened the defense policy of NATO member states in Eastern Europe, with the Estonia prime minister calling for higher military spending and Poland seeking early orders for missile defense and drones.

Russia might have got a head start on its takeover of Crimea by evading U.S. eavesdropping.

Former U.S. Ambassador to Russia Michael McFaul says the post-Cold War era has ended in Europe as a result of Russia's unanticipated aggression.

Please come back, Bob Gates.

Global leaders gather in The Hague today for what could be the penultimate installment of President Obama's biennial confabs on preventing nuclear terrorism.

Think the Pentagon isn't serious about Asia? Think again.

President Obama has ordered a sharp increase in U.S. Special Operations forces deployed to Uganda and sent U.S. military aircraft there for the first time in the ongoing effort to hunt down warlord Joseph Kony across a broad swath of central Africa.

On Capitol Hill, a return to pet military projects.

President Obama's FY2015 budget further reduces missile defense funding, exacerbating a troubling, five-year pattern.

Before recently deploying to Afghanistan, a U.S. Army brigade warned the service's own intelligence center that the battlefield intelligence system doesn't work.

Despite a squeeze on investment accounts, the Pentagon's fiscal 2015 budget strategy prioritizes funding for the stealthy F-35 - but at what cost, some in industry ask.

The military has begun employing 3-D printing to make spare parts and components, but the Army is already exploring the next generation, 4-D printing.

The 82nd Airborne Division today will commemorate the 20th anniversary of the deadly Green Ramp accident that killed 24 paratroopers.

Student veterans seeking associate and bachelor's degrees under the GI Bill have slightly better graduation rates than their nonveteran peers.

No one has come out unscathed after the first four days of March Madness.

Netflix generates a massive amount of data consumption - around a third of traffic online during peak hours.

New York magazine has a great portfolio of musicians who helped shape New York, including Thurston Moore, Debbie Harry and Cyndi Lauper.

Actor James Rebhorn, who plays Carrie's dad on the Showtime drama Homeland, has died.

List: Amazon shares 100 Books to Read in A Lifetime.

Check out 13 ice cream "secrets" from Ben & Jerry's.

Finally: Comics truck

Say goodbye to winter...

<<< SUNDAY, MARCH 23 GAMES ARE CLOSED >>>

Sixty-four South Sound burger joints were selected and seeded by readers throughout February for the Tournament of Burgers, which is now four days into the competition. Brackets don refrigerators, break rooms, restaurant hallways and birdcages. Birthday parties have been moved to burger restaurants. Everyone is discussing patty thickness and lettuce varieties. It's crazy fun.

Yesterday's Results

Game 1: DeLong's Deluxe vs. Blazing Onion

Lakewood burger house DeLong's Deluxe sticks to a formula: good seasoning, perfect cooking and good meat. Delong's burgers are fundamentally simple and textbook perfect, whether it's a Fair Burger, Old Fashioned or DeLong's Cowboy Burger. It's just like what you could make at home, only much, much better. Lakewood doesn't mind standing outside, listening to amplified tunes while waiting for DeLong's Deliciousness. Blazing Onion came out blazing with its gourmet burgers, but at the buzzer, lost by 45 votes. DeLong's Deluxe moves into the Second Round to face Maxwell's March 29.

Game 2: Maxwell's Restaurant & Lounge vs. Famous Dave's

Maxwell's Restaurant and Lounge grabbed 86 percent of the votes over Famous Dave's. Maxwell's take on this classic tops the burger charts with an unconventional potato bun, grilled onion aioli and a patty that stays plenty juicy - a boon for both the sweetness and sturdiness of those buns and the sharpness of white cheddar. High quality arugula and tomato come standard if you swing that way, but the aioli alone does a great job of highlighting the meat. Famous Dave's might have antlers on the wall and fast take-out, but it apparently doesn't have a burger that can compete with Maxwell's A game.

Game 3: Asado vs. O'Malleys Irish Pub

Argentine-inspired steaks, seafood and an in-house ground sirloin and chorizo burger with fried provolone and Serrano ham surrounded by sunset colors, an open kitchen and toasty fireplace. That's a winning combination, at least according to the vote totals in the Tournament of Burgers. Asado put the hurt on O'Malley's Irish Pub with 71 percent of the votes. Number one seed Asado moves into the Second Round to battle with Marrow March 29. No hocus pocus, just focus on Sixth Avenue that day.

Game 4: Marrow Kitchen + Bar vs. King Solomon's Reef

Finally, in yesterday's closest battle, Marrow edged out Olympia's King Solomon's Reef with 53 percent of the votes. This one was surprisingly close. Dubbed "The Best Diner in the Galaxy," The Reef has a solid lineup of burgers, including the popular double meet, double cheese Liberty Burger. Holding the day's trend, fancy won again. Marrow's artisan cheese Beecher's Marco Polo probably sealed the deal. Marco! Polo!

Let's weed through the condiments. The following are advancing to the Second Round:

• Delong's Deluxe
• Maxwell's restaurant
• Asado
• Marrow Kitchen + Bar

The daily burger battles on Walkie Talkie are sponsored by Ricky J's Restaurant and Lounge in Puyallup.

OK, let's dive into today's First Round burger battles. Vote for one burger joint per game. Voting for today's burger battles ends at 11:45 p.m. 

SUNDAY, MARCH 23 2014 >>>

1. Are you ready to run yourself rugged? The Titlow Mud Run offers you multiple obstacles during a 2-mile run, beginning at noon. During those 10,560 feet, you will crawl through the mud, climb over logs, jump fire, and jump wires. However, all obstacles are optional through the trails and woods of Titlow Park. This run was specially made for all types of people, the ones who love to get down and dirty, and the ones who like to keep their feet dry as they jump over puddles and go around mud. For lots of sweaty fun, register at metroparks.com, to receive a complimentary run towel and guaranteed timing for your little jaunt. For people who don't register but still participate, the towel and timing is not guaranteed.

2. The Spring Fairy Festival, the yearly "magical weekend of fae," returns to the Freighthouse Square in Tacoma from noon to 5 p.m. Celebrating fantasy, magic and, of course, faeries, this annual event of pixie dust and gossamer wings provides everything a faer-folk enthusiast could want. Host Crescent Moon Gifts gathers artists, musicians, performers and 45 vendors to cater to the varying tastes of those who adore the faerie realm - meaning tricksy goblins, faeries, beguiling bellydancers, lost boys, steam punks and horned ones.

3. These days, thanks to streaming services like Netflix, there are more people than ever lazily consuming documentary films. What was once viewed as a wasteland of heart-rending Shoah's has been transformed into an easygoing world of pop-docs. Still, the art of the documentary is growing, as technology expands and allows more filmmakers the ability to carry out their vision. As a result, the cream is increasingly rising to the top. Documentaries of merit are coming out of the woodwork, and they're spreading ... including today at The Grand Cinema.

4. Saxophonist Kareem Kandi's sound is virtually unrelated to the roomy traditions of soul saxes, honking saxes or deep-chested boudoir ballad saxes. It derives from the classic, free, often enthusiastic tradition of Joshua Redman as filtered through Dexter Gordon and Sonny Stitt, all of whose shadows can be traced-Redman in Kandi's funky organicism, Gordon in his dynamic harmonics, Stitt in the intensity that coats his every note with a Gritty City finish. Kareem Kandi will be joined by bassist Osama Afifi and drummer Andre Thomas at 6:30 p.m. in the Cliff House Restaurant.

5. The Tacoma Comedy Club presents Bundt Cake Comedy, a carefully curated snapshot of Seattle's sprawling standup scene featuring only the best emerging and established comics and sprinkled with sketches, storytelling, videos and other amusements, beginning at 8 p.m.

LINK: Sunday, March 23 arts and entertainment events in the greater Tacoma and Olympia area

LIVE MUSIC TONIGHT IN THE SOUTH SOUND >>>

Bob's Java Jive Tacoma - Central. The Heels, The Jilly Rizzo, Needles & Pizza, Gold Records. 8 pm.

• "Whether they admit it or not, everyone's got a bit of a heel fetish." So proposes the bio of Seattle glam-power-poppers the Heels. For a band as preoccupied with aesthetics (sound-wise and clothing-wise), it's easy to see why they'd think that. Further, on their Joan Jett-esque anthem, "Fetish," they name-check leather, pencil skirts and angora sweaters. Coming from the rock scene of Los Angeles, frontwoman Paula Spas relocated to the Pacific Northwest, where she uncannily assembled the type of band that you might see play a booze-soaked set at the Whiskey a Go Go in the '70s. This is playful punk at its finest - winking and sexy in equal measure. The Heels exist in a world where everyone has a little secret (which they might be wearing right now, underneath their civilian clothes). - Rev. Adam McKinney
  

Capitol Theater Olympia - Downtown. UpWest Arts Presents: An Evening With Slack-Key Guitarist Keola Beamer & Moanalani Beamer. All Ages. 7:30 pm. $20-$25.

Doyle's Public House Tacoma - Stadium District. The Bog Hoppers. 9:30 pm. NC.

El Potrero Tacoma - Eastside. Banda La Pachanga, DJ Sunami. 9 pm.

Jazzbones Tacoma - Sixth Avenue. Grayskul, RA Scion, Xperience, Rockwell Powers. 9 pm. $7.

La Gitana Olympia - Downtown. Red & Ruby. 6:30 pm.

Louie G's Pizza Fife. Eclectic Approach, Amadon, Clear The Chaos, Static. All Ages. 5 pm.

Matrix Coffee House Lewis County. Just Plain Bill, Patrick Storedahl. All Ages. 7 pm. $10.

Maxwell's Restaurant + Lounge Tacoma - Downtown. The Kareem Kandi Band. All Ages. 8 pm. NC.

Morso Wine Bar Gig Harbor. Michael ONeill CD Release. 8 pm. $25.

• Forged in the ‘70s renaissance of popular Americana, Michael ONeill is a paragon of the ways in which art and life mutually influence one another. He was singing about the dusty trails and the tear-strewn beers and the fast women before he'd ever really spent time with them. So many years on, his music is imbued with the post-world-weary resign that comes with being a man of a certain age, with all the regrets and the fond remembrances that come along with that. Read Rev. McKinney's interview with Michael ONeill.
  

The New Frontier Lounge Tacoma - Dome District. Cottonwood Cutups CD Release Party, with Rusty Cleavers, McDougal. 9 pm. $5. 

Pantages Theater Tacoma - Downtown. Ann Hampton Calloway Presents The Streisand Songbook. All Ages. 7:30 pm. $35-$79.

Rhythm and Rye Olympia - downtown. The Brown Edition, DBST. 9 pm. $5.

Slavonian Hall Tacoma - Old Town. Ed Taylor Band CD Release Party for It's Complicated. All Ages. 7:30 pm. $35 includes dinner.

The Spar Tacoma - Old Town. North Country Bluegrass. 8 pm.

Traditions Cafe and World Folk Art Olympia - Downtown. April Verch. All Ages. 8 pm. $15-$22.

Treos Tacoma - Old Town. The Alex Worland Trio. All Ages. 7:30 pm. NC.

Uncle Sam's American Bar & Grill Spanaway. Fun Police. 9 pm.

Vaeth Mansion Tacoma - Northend. Bluegrass and Old Time Jam & Feed, benefit for Lyn Neal who had her instruments stolen. All Ages. 3 pm. Donations.

LINK: More live music Saturday, March 22 in the greater Tacoma and Olympia area

SATURDAY, MARCH 22, 2014 >>>

1. Does anyone else feel like planet Earth, and South Sound specifically, has a beer/food/music/book/art/film/fairy/cupcake festival every week? This week is no exception. The Spring Fairy Festival, the yearly "magical weekend of fae," returns to the Freighthouse Square in Tacoma from 10 a.m. to 7 p.m. Celebrating fantasy, magic and, of course, faeries, this annual event of pixie dust and gossamer wings provides everything a faer-folk enthusiast could want. Host Crescent Moon Gifts gathers artists, musicians, performers and 45 vendors to cater to the varying tastes of those who adore the faerie realm - meaning tricksy goblins, faeries, beguiling bellydancers, lost boys, steam punks and horned ones.

2. Mike Mignola's Hellboy comic book series is turning a cool 20 this week. What amounted to the quintessential '90s comic book - self-aware, stylized, coolly violent - has come of age in a time that has largely failed at adapting comics of the kind. Punisher, Spawn and The Crow have all been blessedly forgotten failures as adaptations. Come rejoice at the victory of the comic form as Olympic Cards & Comics celebrates with a sampler comic of new Mignola stories beginning at 10 a.m. 

3. Bill Holm, esteemed authority of Northwest Coast Indian Art, will give a special presentation "The Northwest Gun in NW Coast Indian Art" at 1 p.m. at Fort Nisqually.

4. Ann Hampton Callaway presents The Streisand Songbook featuring many of Barbra Streisand's most popular hits. Beginning at 7:30 p.m. in the Pantages Theater, she'll bust out songs from "Don't Rain On My Parade" to "People."

5. Tropical breezes, the scent of coconut oil mixed with blooming plumeria wafting under your nostrils, the salty ocean waves gently rolling on shore, inches from your bare feet - ah, Hawaii, how we wish we were there. Since we're not, and the pleasantness of spring in the Pacific Northwest is just barely here, we'll go with Plan B: Keola Beamer and Moanalani at 8 p.m. in the Capitol Theater.

LINK: Saturday, March 22 arts and entertainment events in the greater Tacoma and Olympia area

SATURDAY, MARCH 22: FIRST ROUND BURGER ACTION >>>

Even in this era of kohlrabi salads, Haute Mexicanand Chinese-Peruvian, the hamburger remains America's favorite food, and burger fans - of which you are undoubtedly one - are insanely opinionated about what the consummate burger should look and taste like. Tear into the Tournament of Burgers, make a mess and dribble 'til the cows come home.

Yesterday's Results

Game 1: Duke's Chowder House vs. Chalk Talk Bistro

Duke's Chowder House has fancy newsletters, kick ass chowder and a gorgeous view of Commencement Bay. Chalk Talk Bistro has chalk ... oh, and delicious burgers. Formerly Mary's Burger Bistro, the sportsified Chalk Talk put the dispsy-doo double-a-roo on Duke's, and grabbed 56 percent of the votes from way at the end of the grill, BANG!

Game 2: Pick-Quick Drive-In vs. The Schooner Pub & Galley

The Schooner Pub is a dark place. It's truly one of the darker watering holes in the South Sound. Obviously, there are advantages to drinking in dimly lit joints. For one, squinting isn't attractive. Anyway, yesterday was the Lakewood bar's worst possible cave scenario. We haven't had many sunny days since early autumn. The Schooner's competitor, Pick-Quick Drive-in, offers a nice park-like outdoor eating area (albeit, with a view of I-5). The walk-up burger joint was packed with questionable open shirts and giddiness. Sunshine grabbed 75 percent of the votes and Pick-Quick moves into the next round to take on Chalk Talk Bistro March 28.

Game 3: Loose Wheel Bar & Grill vs. The Westside Tavern

If there's one thing our food tournaments has seen over the years; you don't mess with West Olympia. The community huddles around their own - more often than not with sleeves rolled up and a chew in place. The Westside Tavern grabbed a respectable 62 percent of the votes yesterday in its win over the tough Loose Wheel Bar & Grill. That's impressive. That's the Westside.

Game 4: Pacific Grill vs. South Bay Pub & Eatery

If there's a trend developing it's that elegance or unique toppings don't wow Tournament of Burgers voters. Sure, a fancy burger can get you somewhere in the Tournament of Burgers, but it doesn't guarantee anything - your burger foundation has to be sound before voters will get behind some of the fancier stuff. While Pacific Grill gushes sophistication and class, it had a tough day on the burger court. It beat Olympia's scrappy South Bay Pub & Eatery by one vote. One. Pacific Grill will need to reanalyze its game plan, as it will take on another scrappy Olympia burger flipper in the Second Round - Westside Tavern.

Let's weed through the condiments. The following are advancing to the Second Round:

• Chalk Talk Bistro
• Pick-Quick Drive-In
• Westside Tavern
• Pacific Grill

The daily burger battles on Walkie Talkie are sponsored by Ricky J's Restaurant and Lounge in Puyallup.

OK, let's dive into today's First Round burger battles. Vote for one burger joint per game. Voting for today's burger battles ends at 11:45 p.m. 

GRAB A CUP AND READ THE MORNING REPORT FOR 3.22.14 >>>

Russian troops have surrounded a Ukrainian airbase in Crimea and issued an ultimatum to forces inside to surrender.

Would America go to war with Russia?

Boeing's new refueling tanker program will cost $1.1 billion more than initially planned.

The Defense Department has spent $2.6 million to date in the expanding international search effort to find missing Malaysian Airlines Flight 370.

When you scrutinize the size and composition of the cuts that sequestration has imposed on the government, it isn't clear the law really improves the nation's fiscal health. Here are four reasons why.

The Pentagon's share of the White House's $56 billion Opportunity, Growth and Security Initiative requests more than double the procurement money previously disclosed in budget documents earlier this month.

The United States is puzzling over how to block cruise missiles that theoretically could be launched from the Gulf of Mexico, even after throwing some of its most advanced technologies at the problem.

In the run-up to Russia's paramilitary invasion of Crimea, U.S. intelligence saw Vladimir Putin's saboteurs and mercenaries coming, and not stopping at Crimea either.

On policy allowing women into combat, Marines prepared to seek exceptions.

Tank Goodness: Armor programs will recover despite GVC kill, sequester.

The Defense Advanced Research Projects Agency has awarded contracts to four companies to design a vertical take-off and landing aircraft that is much faster than a helicopter but retains excellent hover capability.

The Air Force is surging ahead with work to extend the service life of its fleet of F-16 fighter jets despite recent budget cuts.

Shooters from around the world will compete in the 2014 U.S. Army Special Operations Command International Sniper Competition beginning Monday.

The founder of Occupy Wall Street wants the President of the United States to resign and appoint her boss, Google's Chairman Eric Schmidt, to a new post, CEO of America.

Cool: The largest and most definitive collection of time-travel stories ever assembled.

Kim Deal may no longer be part of the Pixies, but she's still making music and released this pulsating new single/video this week.

A day in the life of Sarah Silverman.

These special effects will blow your mind, and your brain.

Watching these dogs confused by a magic trick is hilariously cute.

This video is so insane we had to stop watching it.

Then there's this...

Gen. Paul Selva, Air Mobility Command commander, announced the 2013 AMC Outstanding Airmen of the Year during a command-wide video teleconference at Scott Air Force Base today. Master Sgt. Marc R. Sellers, of the 62nd Maintenance Squadron at Joint Base Lewis McChord, was named Senior Noncommissioned Officer of the Year.

The 2013 AMC Outstanding Airmen of the Year are:

Junior Enlisted Airman of the Year:

Senior Airman Leanne M. Murray, 87th Air Base Wing, Joint Base McGuire-Dix-Lakehurst, N.J.

Noncommissioned Officer of the Year:

Tech. Sgt. Toyre L. Hudson, 6th Medical Operations Squadron, MacDill AFB, Fla.

Senior Noncommissioned Officer of the Year:

Master Sgt. Marc R. Sellers, 62nd Maintenance Squadron, JB Lewis-McChord, Wash.

First Sergeant of the Year:

Master Sgt. Richard W. McCorkle, 319th Security Forces Squadron, Grand Forks, AFB, N.D.

Honor Guard Member of the Year:

Senior Airman Jacob Coburn, 89th Communications Squadron, JB Andrews, Md.

Honor Guard Program Manager of the Year:

Master Sgt. Gary Knight, 87th Force Support Squadron, JB MDL, N.J.

Honor Guard Team of the Year:

87th Air Base Wing, JB MDL, N.J.

First Sergeant Council of the Year:

87th Air Base Wing, JB MDL, N.J.

With the exception of Honor Guard Team and First Sergeant Council of the Year, all winners identified above will now compete for the Air Force 12 Outstanding Airmen of the Year.

The 16th Combat Aviation Brigade (CAB) is ready to deploy to Afghanistan.

"We are competent, committed to the mission and persons of character," said Col. Paul Mele, the brigade's commander during a deployment ceremony held this morning at Soldiers Field House.

"Why we go to Afghanistan is to support our partners who are still there on the ground," Mele continued.

"They will call for protection, supplies, to carry the wounded and to destroy those who will harm them. We are the right aviation solution for them."

The 16th CAB is scheduled for a nine-month deployment in support of the International Security Assistance Force mission in Afghanistan.

The brigade's approximately 1,500 soldiers will provide reconnaissance, close combat attack, troop lift and logistical movement support to Regional Command-South. 

This is the first deployment to Afghanistan in the brigade's history. Earlier deployments include tours to Iraq in support of Operation Iraqi Freedom and Operation New Dawn.

>>> Spc. Patrick Kirchgessner holds the colors of the 16th Combat Aviation Brigade prior to their casing for deployment to Afghanistan. Photo credit: J.M. Simpson

For the past two years, the brigade has been preparing for this deployment, with training conducted at the National Training Center in California, High Altitude Mountainous Environment Training in Idaho and home station training.

The unit will be the first in the Army to deploy equipped with the upgraded AH-64E Apache "Guardian" attack helicopter.

"You are on a historic journey," Maj. Gen. Terry Ferrell, commander, 7th Infantry Division, said.

"You are a brigade prepared to go to war."

>>> Lt. Col. John Davis and Command Sgt. Maj. Curtin Stapleton case the 1st Battalion, 229th Aviation Regiment's colors during the 16th Combat Aviation Brigade's Deployment Ceremony. Photo credit: J.M. Simpson