ERMAHGERD! There's going to be a Goosebumps movie, you guys!

Continuing the exhausting phase of mining every little bit of nostalgia for the increasingly apathetic eyes of '90s children, the once-beloved book series of cheesy lite horror for kids is coming roaring to the big screen.

The audience for such an adaptation has got to be vanishingly low, right? We're talking adults in their mid-20s to early 30s (because I doubt children are still reading them, and adults back then didn't read them) who fondly remember reading the Goosebumps series (I read them, but can't remember a single thing about them) and who care so deeply that they'll jump at the opportunity to see some interpretation of it in a movie theater.

While the project has been in works for some time, it was recently announced that Jack Black will star as R.L. Stine, the author of the series, which lends a level of unwelcome meta commentary, for me. Remember when the book The Time Machine also existed in the universe of the movie The Time Machine? Or when Bo and Luke Duke in the movie version of The Dukes of Hazzard can be seen watching the TV show The Dukes of Hazzard? No? Neither of those? Well, it was infuriating.

If there's one ray of positivity surrounding the Goosebumps movie, it's that idiosyncratic screenwriter Mike White (School of Rock, Chuck & Buck) had a hand in penning the script. After his run with the criminally overlooked HBO series, Enlightened, this will be White's first return to movies since his disappointing Year of the Dog in 2007. If anyone can inject an off-kilter earnestness into what is essentially a nostalgia-exploiting cash grab, it's Mike White.

WEDNESDAY, FEB. 26: C.L.A.W. OPEN SWIM

C.L.A.W. sounds like a sinister cartoon shadow organization, but that's only partly true. The Cartoonist's League of Absurd Washingtonians is a collective of artists - including Tacomic creator and all around provocateur RR Anderson - who meet up to share their work and create new works together. Their Open Swim event is an opportunity for non-members to come around and participate in the mad cartooning.

Artists will collect a word from a mystical fez, and will then be expected to incorporate that concept into their drawing, in addition to general commiserating. It's geeky fun for creative types who want to share their work with likeminded weirdos - sort of like the Internet, but with real live people for you to not make eye contact with. Fun! 7:30 p.m., King's Books, 218 Saint Helens Ave., Tacoma, 253.272.8801

Until next time, super perfundo on the early eve of your day! 

Typically, when an airman has a question about a personnel issue - a problem with pay, for instance, or a question about PCS orders or retirement - he or she stops by the personnel office to work it out. But this isn't always possible - especially when the service member is deployed.

In 2012, the Air Force launched myPers, a retooled version of the Air Force's personnel website. It brought together a plethora of information that Airmen could access from around the world at the touch of a few buttons.  

"We're always looking for better ways to serve those who serve," said Col. Pat Blassie, commander, Headquarters Air Reserve Personnel Center (AFPC) in a press release shortly after the myPers site was launched in 2012. "Each technological advancement we can offer our customers from the Total Force Service Center is part of a longer-term strategy to deliver human resource services as quickly, as seamlessly, and as efficiently as possible anytime and anywhere an airman might be; myPers is another outstanding refinement to that end."

Last year, myPers added a feature that allows airmen to chat about personnel issues from anywhere in the world in real time - with real people.

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Television reports and social media have been consumed with the Seattle Seahawks' smiling faces, fist pumps and trophy kisses captured during the team's Super Bowl Championship parade. In a majority of the images, at least on the parade route down Fourth Avenue, another presence ingrained in the public's mind - the Washington National Guard. Guardsman and their vehicles - 5-ton Medium Tactical Vehicle (MTV) Troop Carriers, Standard Humvees and Light Armored Humvees - escorted the players, Coach Pete Carroll and his staff, General Manager Paul Schneider and team owner Paul Allen past more than 700,000 screaming fans - who lined the same road the Seattle Supersonics celebrated decades ago. Braving sub-freezing temperatures, the fans cheered the parade as it made its way through the city's downtown toward a celebration at CenturyLink Field. State politicians, including Gov. Jay Inslee and Sen. Maria Cantwell, King County Executive Dow Constantine, Seattle Mayor Ed Murray and other VIPs rode ahead of the Guard in iconic Ride The Ducks of Seattle amphibious tour vehicles

Seattle's first Super Bowl victory parade didn't involve the Washington National Guard because the vehicles looked cool. It happened because of an ongoing statewide relationship and community outreach effort between the Guard and the Seahawks.

"The Seahawks and the Sounders FC, are proud partners and supporters of the Guard with activities like this taking place throughout the year," said Mike flood, Seahawks vice president of community relations.  "We salute Washington National Guard service members and families for the dedication to our country and the great state of Washington!"

Community Outreach is one of the major priorities of Maj. Gen. Bret D. Daugherty, adjutant general and director of Washington's military department. The Guard stood proud next to the Seahawks during many statewide community outreach efforts.

"We are so honored that the Seahawks and the Seafair organization asked us to help out with this celebration," said Daugherty. "Our men and women wear many hats. They're protectors of our state, defenders of our nation and some of the most committed 12^th Man fans you'll ever meet. We are pleased to play such an important role in (the) parade.

Besides transporting the team, the Guard supported local law authorities in an effort to keep the huge crowd safe. Even though the crowd quickly grew past the estimated 400,000 mark to a size greater than the historic Woodstock concert, not a single major injury or arrest was reported in this organized chaos.

The Recruiting and Retention Battalion of the Washington National Guard has been a part of the Seahawks organization for years. The Guard has placed static military vehicles before games at CenturyLink, conducted re-enlistment ceremonies on the field and coordinated with NFL players to join High Speed Player Development (HSPD) events with high schools throughout the state. The NFL HSPD program works to incorporate the leadership and responsibility framework of the Guard/military among high school athletes, as well as champion the military through recruitment presentations.

"As the battalion commander for this city and a season ticket holder since day one, this was a one-in-a-lifetime experience that I will never forget," said Lt. Col. Adam Iwaszuk, 181 Brigade Support commander). "Getting to experience the unimaginable dream of walking down Seattle, holding the Vince Lombardi Championship trophy is something I will forever cherish."

The Seattle Seahawks celebrate their Super Bowl XLVIII victory over the Denver Broncos in force today as the entire team has made its way through downtown Seattle on Humvees and Light Medium Tactical Vehicles with spectators lining the streets. Soldiers and airmen in the Washington National Guard transported the players, coaches and elected officials along the route.

"We are so honored that the Seahawks and the Seafair organization asked us to help out with this celebration," said Maj. Gen. Bret Daugherty, the state's adjutant general and commander of the Washington National Guard, in a release. "Our men and women wear many hats - they're protectors of our state, defenders of our nation, and some of the most committed 12th Man fans you'll ever meet. We are pleased to play such an important role in tomorrow's parade. We'll be transporting people along the route, as well as supporting local law authorities who will ensure everyone who attends the event remains safe."

Of course the Washington National Guard was asked to transport the Seahawk players during the parade. Half the 12th Man spirit photos on Facebook during December and January involved the Washington National Guard. Camp Murray could have been mistaken for a Marshawn Lynch Skittles Factory during the month of January.

The Seahawks Super Bowl parade started at 11 a.m. on Fourth Avenue, south of Denny Way and to the current championship celebration at CenturyLink Field. Approximately 859,345 lined the Seattle streets today - but according to most school districts, most of the crowd was drinking age. Yeah, right. We expect more paper will be used for sick excuse notes from doctors tomorrow than parade confetti used today. The adjacent Safeco Field is also open and carrying a live feed of CenturyLink Field's on-field presentation on the ballpark's large video boards.

Below are photos snapped by Walkie Talkie Parade Correspondent Gary Lott, live on the scene. NOT PICTURED: The Denver Broncos.

Congratulations Seahawks!

State Sen. Steve O'Ban and Rep. Dick Muri have introduced military-related bills during the 60-day 2014 legislative session, which began Jan. 13 and is scheduled to adjourn March 13. The two lawmakers will no doubt update the public on the bills, as well as others, at their 28th District town hall events.

The first event Saturday, Feb. 1, will be an in-person town hall meeting at Patriots Landing at 1600 Marshall Circle in DuPont. The gathering will take place in the Olympic Dining Room from 10 to 11:30 a.m. No RSVP is required.

The second meeting is an hour-long telephone town hall scheduled for 7 p.m. Tuesday, Feb. 4. To take part in the call, residents can dial in toll-free 1-877-229-8493 and enter PIN# 112355. The phone line will open shortly before the call begins. To ask questions of the lawmakers during the call, participants can press star three (*3) on their telephone keypads.

The lawmakers will give a brief update on issues being discussed during the legislative session then open the call up to questions.

Rep. Muri, R-Steilacoom and retired lieutenant colonel in the United States Air Force, introduced two measures that would assist veterans and better serve their disabled children in Washington state. Muri is currently serving his first legislative session as a state representative for the 28th District. House Bill 2343 would allow the option for veterans to have a veteran designation on their driver's licenses and identicards issues by the state Department of Licensing. House Bill 2363 would require the state Department of Health and Social Services to provide services to developmentally disabled children of military servicemembers in the order he or she was on the waiting list in another state, rather than having to go to the bottom of the list for services after relocating to Washington.

Sen. O'Ban R-Pierce County, has several state Senate bills on the table. SB 5969 would help military members and veterans get college credit for the training they received during their service. SB 5970 would grant civilian credit to military members and veterans for skills and abilities they developed while in the service. SB 6049 would help incentivize businesses in Washington to hire veterans by providing those business owners with a business and occupations tax credit, one of the most burdensome business taxes in the state. SB 6084 would allow a senior citizen or service-connected disabled veteran to qualify for a property tax exemption if they are near the poverty line and meet other benchmarks as well.

Residents who are unable to participate in the call can send comments and questions to O'Ban and Muri via e-mail at Steve.OBan@leg.wa.gov and Dick.Muri@leg.wa.gov. Or, they can leave a message for both legislators by calling the toll-free legislative hotline at 1-800-562-6000.

Every year theCascade Regional Blood Services hosts a blood drive program titled "Give Blood Get Beer" - a program where if you donate a pint of blood you will receive a complimentary pint of beer.

Hurrah!

Enter fast talking announcer guy:"Give Blood Get Beeris a theme for a series of Cascade Regional Services blood drives that enable local restaurants and pubs to support our community's blood supply in a unique and fun way. All registered blood donors will receive a T-shirt and pre-paid coupon for a pint of beer, redeemable beginning the day following the drive. Vampires may not participate in the program."

More details to follow, probably during the next full moon.

GIVE BLOOD GET BEER, 2-5 p.m. Friday, Jan. 31, Adriatic Grill, 4201 S. Steele St., Tacoma, 877.24.BLOOD

TUESDAY, JAN. 21 2014 >>>

1. The Abigails are fixtures in the Southern California psych-rock garage scene. Thomas has been a member of bands like the Growlers and the Grand Elegance, and fellow Abigail Kyle Mullarky has been in the Starlite Desperation - all bands that occupy a sort of LSD haze. Additionally, the Abigails are members of Burger Records, the epicenter of SoCal psych-rock. Read Rev. Adam Mckinney's full feature on the Abigails in the Music & Culture section. Then, catch the band with MILK at 8 p.m. in The New Frontier Lounge in Tacoma.

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MONDAY, JAN. 20 2014 >>>

1. Dr. Martin Luther King was propelled into the public limelight five days after civil rights activist Rosa Parks, on Dec. 5, 1955, refused to obey the Montgomery, Ala., law mandating that blacks sit in the back of the bus. A boycott of the city buses was declared, and King, as president of the newly formed Montgomery Improvement Association, was chosen to lead the boycott. His house was bombed, and he was convicted along with other boycott leaders on charges of conspiring to interfere with the bus company's operation. His courage and his impassioned speech led to the desegregation of Montgomery's buses in 1956 when the United States Supreme Court declared Alabama's segregation laws unconstitutional. Over the next 20 years, King emerged as a symbol and leader of the civil rights struggle, despite opposition from both inside and outside the movement. Civil rights opponents reviled him as being too radical, and a significant portion of civil rights activists reviled him as being too moderate, but his commitment to nonviolent means and his vision of an America in which all people will be judged on the content of their character, not on the color of their skin, have come to stand for everything that is good and just about America. We have listed Martin Luther King Jr. Day events in our News section.

2. In honor of the life and work of Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr., the Washington State History Museum offers free admission from 10 a.m. to 5 p.m.

3. As a popular poet once noted, "Makin' your way / in the world today / takes everything you've got." Yes, it's back to the coal mines, tired already from Seahawks celebrations. You need something to work off that beer, and MLKBallet will be celebrating MLK Day by offering a special Contemporary Master Class at 7 p.m. in the Urban Grace Church. 

4. Tonight at the Swiss drink beer and behold Dakota Bob & The Businessman Band, starting at 8 p.m. and featuring absolutely no cover charge.

5. Internationally ignored DJ No Pants and Mega Hit DJ Aaron Miggity Mack will spin jazz at O'Malley's Irish Pub beginning at 9 p.m.

LINK: Monday, Jan. 20 arts and entertainment events in the greater Tacoma and Olympia area

SATURDAY, JAN. 18 2014 >>>

1. Looks like the Bettie Brigade, Dockyard Derby Dames have competition for the title of Fastest Wheels in the South Sound tonight. The National Speed Skating Circuit (NSC) holds its first event of the year at 7 p.m. in the Tacoma Armory.  Inline skaters will race around a wooden track at speeds of up to 30 mph, in both sprints and endurance challenges.

2. Let's Play! will fill the Tacoma Dome with more than 40 different local sports and fitness organizations from 10 a.m. to 7 p.m. Each fitness outfit on tap will offer up demonstrations or hands-on experiences so you can try your hand at everything from martial arts to lacrosse to ZUMBA to rock climbing. The event aims to get adults, families and especially local kids interested in being active. After all, how can you know if you love fencing or canoeing if you've never tried it?  

3. Do you know what Shodo is? How about Sumi-e? Tako? Ikebana? Well, you have to know origami - don't you? OK, quickly, in reverse order, they are: paper-folding, flower-arranging, kite-making, ink-painting and calligraphy. Confused? Excellent. Now you can go to the Oshogatsu in Olympia: Japanese New Year Celebration to get yourself straightened out. From 10 a.m. to 4 p.m. in the Olympia Center, you cannot only learn the difference between all of these delicate arts, you can experience firsthand Japanese dance and music, taiko drumming, aikido and vocal performances. You'll walk away culturally educated and suddenly able to kill hours at work by folding all of your memos into little cranes and flowers. Oh, how you'll Odori it.

4. If you're a fan of Downton Abbey, and have craved receiving a fancy engraved invitation that reads, "Lord and Lady Hinklebottom request your company for dinner at Hinklebottom Manor in East Thrappingstock," then this is your lucky day. OK, "Hinklebottom Manor" is actually the Key Center Pierce County Library and "East Thrappingstock" is Lakebay, but it's still a fancy event. Food Historian Tames Alan discusses various aspects of British upper-class dining as it would've been eaten "upstairs" at Downton Abbey prior to the outbreak of World War I at 2 p.m. Manners, menu and accouterments of a full 12-course meal are on the table (figuratively speaking. They are not, we repeat not actually serving a full, 12-course meal). 

5. Waylon Jennings sang like he meant business. He didn't get fancy, and he didn't send his voice on missions it could not complete, but there was an urgency in his best songs that pounded them home. When he sang something, it stayed sung. The Outlaws will mosey on into Doyle's at 9 p.m. for a Jennings tribute. Pro tip: Find a parking spot early on St. Helens before the dusty pick-up trucks cranking AM radio arrive.

LINK: Saturday, Jan. 18 arts and entertainment events in the greater Tacoma and Olympia area

SUNDAY, JAN. 12 2014 >>>

1. Today is the last day to bundle up, pinch your cheeks until they glow and strap on a pair of silver skates, Hans Brinker, for a glide across the frozen expanse at Tollefson Plaza. The Franciscan Polar Plaza, located on the corner of Pacific Avenue and South 17th Street, ends today. Hit the ice from 10 a.m. to 8 p.m.

2. Jeffry Steele performs works by three 19th-century guitar masters - Mertz, Sor and Tarrega - with Monica Steele on piano beginning at 3 p.m. at the Antique Sandwich Company.

3. The Blues Vespers inside the Immanuel Presbyterian Church in North Tacoma will feature long-time blues band Junkyard Jane beginning at 5 p.m.

4. Wikipedia says, "Sunday night blues is an acute condition, mostly affecting nine-to-five workers and students." Wikipedia is full of crap. Sunday night blues is an awesome condition, mostly affecting a graying crowd of music lovers. For as long as we can remember, The Spar in Old Town Tacoma has hosted blues bands every Sunday night. And it doesn't matter what band is shoved into the corner, the people arrive at 7 p.m. by rote. It's a beautiful thing. Tonight, the Boneyard Preachers perform their contemporary blues at The Spar.

5. The cranksets will be rattling tonight at 2nd Cycle on Hilltop Tacoma. The non-profit bicycle co-op — with a vast collection of used parts, frames, and complete bikes — will host an all-ages hip-hop show featuring Araless & QuiVive, Nocturnal, Smear, Awall aka 2piece, Rize-Berg, Makkk Hussein, Whikid Maticuless and Eeetree beginning at 8 p.m. 

LINK: Sunday, Jan. 12 arts and entertainment events in the greater Tacoma and Olympia area