The latest location for the Original Roadhouse Grill is a killer. It's in the Federal Way retail bottleneck, at the back of some plaza that sits like a box canyon; shoppers, diners, movie-goers alike all funnel into this zone off 320th and Highway 99, half-blind from wholesale excess, wondering where they can eat. The Original Roadhouse Grill, born in Gresham, Ore., has to compete with numerous other restaurant chains in that mess.

Their atmosphere will win many restaurant choice battles.

Last night’s Roadhouse Grill private opening I witnessed the kind of chaos that would completely shatter any normal restaurant crew: dining rooms filled to capacity, marketing crew bottlenecking the lobby, people slipping on the ice outside, people slipping on the greasy, peanut shell littered concrete floor inside and the bathrooms blocked by the staff’s periodic line-dancing routine.  Craziness.  But this staff is trained well.  My cute redheaded server answered every question, gave quick service, all with a smile.

Like the other 15 Roadhouse locations, the new Federal Way location â€" set to open Jan. 15 â€" is designed for a roadhouse feel, although it needs to be beaten up a bit for a true roadhouse feel.  It’s too slick.  It needs a few beer bottled throw at the walls.  Maybe some spilled chew cups, blood and lipstick should be incorporated somewhere.  Indoors tin roofs and old road signs set a tone, but it needs roughing up a bit.

The portions and drinks are big as a roadhouse.  Categorized in trucker lingo â€" Short Hauls for appetizers, Extra Cargo for sides, The Garage for pork chops and salmon (?) â€" the plates arrive large, stacked with juicy prime rib, typical burger variations, and Midwestern corn-fed beef.  The Petite Filet Mignon arrived bland.  Specialty drinks arrive in 30-ounce mason jars.  Beers stand tall 23-ounce glasses. 

Owner Ralph Cimmarusti, who own original Roadhouse Grills up and down the Wets Coast including a Lacey location next year with his brother Larry, broke the roar last night with a speech.  “This is our first entry into Washington state,” he stated, “and we chose Federal Way. The city welcomed us and did a great job.
“On Monday, 50 percent of all sales will be donated to the Federal Way Boys & Girls Club.”

Fifty percent on last night’s bar bill went to the Boys & Girls Club too.  Those kids will do well off the Weekly Volcano’s table alone.  Carmen Jones and Suzy Stump were well over 100 ounces each.

Entrees ranger in price from $12 to $21, burgers and entreé salads hover around $9 and Short Hauls are $5 to $7. â€" Jake de Paul