SUZY STUMP: CHOOSE THE BEST OPTION FOR YOU >>>

In my mind's eye, wine events are sophisticated and elegant events. The wines are perfectly matched with complicated, delicious food that I wouldn't take the time to prepare even if I had the recipes.

A handsome man representing an unpronounceable vineyard in a country I can't quite pinpoint makes me realize how little I know about wine â€" and the etiquette. Do I spit it into the bucket after swishing it around like Scope? Do I get to swallow it, or is that crass? Can I ask for seconds? Why am I paying someone to make me feel inferior?

Or there's the other kind of wine tasting, where everyone shows up at someone's house with a bottle of their favorite wine. This is the optimum way to taste some cheap wine that you normally wouldn't drink on a bet. You get some Triscuits and some Cheez Whiz, and maybe someone brings hummus. You're guaranteed to have a headache the next day.

Or, there's a third option: Enjoy wines from around the world during an auction to raise funds for the Tacoma Neighborhood Business Districts inside the Wheelock Student Center Rotunda Room on the University of Puget Sound campus.

If the third option looks appealing, grab $60 and head over to said Rotunda Room Saturday, Oct. 25 at 5:30 p.m., bid on stuff from the business districts, and thank Tacoma Neighborhoods Together in a guaranteed drunk slur.

For reservations, Ron Michael at 253.627.5277.