STEPH DEROSA: CRAP. CANCELED >>>

Editor's note: Steph DeRosa hung out with the dancers from Burn the Floor for a feature story in the Weekly Volcano. Sadly, the show has been canceled for unknown reasons. We have left messages with the touring company and will pass on the reason once we hear.  In the meantime, enjoy Steph's quality time with the dancers.

I felt all fancy and stuff as a Tacoma Dome representative escorted me out of the rain, through a multitude of brand spankin’ new RVs (Tacoma RV show happenin’ this weekend, people!), and into a large room with one single and equally large, round table. At the table were three of the most beautiful people I’ve ever seen. With huge smiles they greeted me as we sat down to talk. It all seemed so professional. I couldn’t help but laugh â€" a professional interview was not something my brain was equipped to handle.

I had to be honest to my interviewees: Patrick Helm, Sharna Burgess, and Jason Gilkison of Burn the Floor, an upcoming ballroom dancing show being held Jan. 24 at the Tacoma Dome. Right off the bat I informed them that I did not work for your average, boring paper, and that I was not looking to ask your average, boring questions. I wanted to know what went on behind the scenes when a group of 22 adult professional dancers between the ages of 17 and 40 traveled nonstop around the world together. There had to be some crazy stories, I just knew it.

Fortunately, Burn the Floor is not your average, boring ballroom dance performance, and these three characters were far from being anything average and boring. As a matter of fact, show choreographer Jason Gilkison noted that the show has been described as “Ballroom dancing that’s been given a hard kick to the left.”

“It takes an organic direction that’s fun and energetic,” he tells me. But what about the inside dirt on these dancers? I needed to find out, and so I did.

I asked about an initiation. When a prime, young 17-year-old who is still wet behind the ears joins this large family of dancers, did they make them do anything? “What’s an initiation?” asked German member Patrick Helm. Gilkison filled Helm in on my American terminology, then answered my question, “Yeah, we try to make them drink their body weight and have them puking all night. It’s usually after one of their first shows.” Awesome. This was the stuff I liked to hear.

“Do you guys go out a lot after the shows?” I asked. Yes, yes they did. I have a feeling they went out on the town more than Paris Hilton.  Did they go to clubs so they could dance? Nope. They prefer to hang out in non-crowded and non-noisy bars. “We create all the noise ourselves, we’re the ones who make it wild,” Sharna Burgess told me. I immediately informed them that I could suggest quite a few dive bars, for that’s exactly what it sounded like they’d be looking for. All three of them immediately scolded me for not being around last night when they could’ve used such pertinent information. Then they asked, “What’s a dive bar?” Ah, foreigners gotta love ‘em.

For about an hour I heard all about their two-month stint in Vegas, how they showed up for a radio interview drunkenly plastered (they actually had to hold each other up during said interview), their four-month bout in Reno (which according to them was two months too long), which apartment floor was considered “crack corner” in Reno, how they repeatedly had noise complaints about them, how they were headed to Vancouver next, and then talk of Vancouver led to the next big discussion … DRUGS.

I asked them, being from Germany and Australia, how they viewed the cultural differences of drug use in America compared to where they were from. Apparently it is still “illegal” in Germany, as it is here, but drug use is not a problem like it is in the USA. Their views were that America was “extremely controlling” of their citizens with all the laws, yet had the biggest drug epidemic. America has countless laws and ironically has the highest crime rate. Go figure.

Helm let me know that in Germany people know exactly which coffee shop to go to when they want something and that mushrooms are the big thing now. Burgess then filled me in on the rising popularity of “natural alternatives” to these illegal drugs over in Germany. They have the same effects, yet they are legally “natural.” That’s right, we spent some time talking about drugs. I loved these guys.

The threesome of dancers did also enlighten me on what it’s like to have a “showmance.” A “showmance” is a romance amongst show performers. They’re hanging out with each other, basically living together, for months on end. It’s natural to have a drunken fling once in a while. Most likely the drunken fling turns into “friends with benefits,” which eventually turns into a full-fleged “showmance.” The worst part of it all is coming out to your fellow troop members and acknowledging the relationship after you’ve been denying it for months. “You have to come to everyone, all embarrassed, and say “Fine, you were right, we’re seeing each other,” and then it’s all OK,” Burgess tells me. They all agreed with Burgess and nodded. They’ve all been through it. Apparently this is the part where they felt they were in Reno for two months too long.

What happens when they break up? Does someone have to leave? Is it awkward? Gilkison says, “A little awkward, but then we move on.” Dammit. I wanted some drama!

Finally, it was time for me to go. My half-hour interview easily turned into an hour. The dancers from Burn the Floor are now my new friends, and Gilkison and I realized we might’ve been separated at birth. As a matter of fact, we have each other’s phone numbers. Is that bad? Hell no. My ass is going to hopefully party with them at The Mix on Jan. 24. That is, if they don’t up and head to the next town after the show.

As I was about to leave, I remembered I needed some pictures. Boring poses were not in the cards for anything involving these crazy cats and me. We all agreed that the RVs looked undoubtedly inviting, and that it was in fact easier to ask for forgiveness than for permission. So off to the RVs we went. Enjoy!

[Tacoma Dome, Burn the Floor, Saturday, Jan. 24, canceled, 2525 E. D St., Tacoma, 253.OUR.LOSS]]