Weekly Volcano Blogs: Walkie Talkie Blog

August 28, 2009 at 12:56pm

Tacoma at Burning Man: the road

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POP: ON THE WAY TO BURNING MAN >>>

Burn Burn-Logo Dear Tacoma beloved city of my heart,

I have been asked by the Weekly Volcano to introduce myself and take you on a fantastic, voyeuristic joy ride.

Always up for ‘the next best thing’ and madly in love with the Volcano, I could NEVER say NO to you, Tacomite Freaks!

So, howdy.

I’m “Pop”â€" creature of Love and Self Expression, nomad made stationary by only you and your fair city. I live and work in Tacoma.

Thought nothing could tie me down. Guess it was the cable stay bridge (strong cables).

What am I? Aching artist adventurer, pyro lover, movement manic and surrender to the Spirit of all things ART.

Perhaps a drag queen in a past life, maybe waif debutante wacko in this one,

I am open to voyeuristic experience of almost any kind, except violent or destructive â€" not open to that. Period. And neither the fuck are you, thank you very much.

If you choose to partake in our delightful journey over the next Sp(f)ew weeks,

I’m gonna introduce you to Burning Man.

What's ‘The Burn,’ one might ask?

Oh, young grasshopper, follow me and ye shall see a tale of fantastical measure, evermore transformational.

In short, welcome to the vortex of love, joy, and selective debauchery. It’s Disneyland for the most seasoned, savvy, street-smart of us all, and overwhelming for anyone with deep-rooted fears they don't face (ummm, that would be you!). You can read the official explanation here.

Every single year, Burning Man is the beginning of the end as I know it, for all involved.

This may be your chance to be a Virgin all over again, which is what we seasoned Burners call flippin’ â€" ALL of you who have not drunk the sweet, sweaty nectar of ‘The Playa.’

Burning Man is Juicy. I hope you’ll come along on my ride. It’s gonna be a doozie.

I’ll be posting daily to the Spew, because Tacoma is the coolest place on the planet â€" tied only with ‘The Burn.’

Fierce prep has begun. The Burn starts on Aug. 31.

Driving to Nevada in a convoy of Others…

We’ve cleared Tacoma’s party stores of glow sticks, scavenged through B&I for vicious makeup and skimpy wanton wear, dredged Goodwill for Tupperware ‘pee jars,’ mounted milk crates and fake fur into my cargo van love ride, shaved or hennaed our sweets spots (ahem), designed animals from dried mango and berries to gift to freak strangers, and created costumes from every piece of lingerie appropriate for wear in 110 degree desert sun. Artist Desiree knows of what I speak.

Libra by day/Scorpio by night, it is my honor to introduce, coax and coerce each of you Tacomites to convoy with me to the wildest, most vivacious experience on Earth - The Burning Man Festival (well, until maybe I have a kid with the Tacoma Gnome â€" I think he’s hot even if he is short - or die or something.)

Why the hell should you care?

What did you say? Did you say that out loud?

Pfffttt! Motorized giant cupcakes flying across the desert with little people driver heads sticking out as cherries on top! Cars with twenty-foot cobra heads pyro-spitting fire like a hell induced joy ride designed specially for the Urban Arts Festival crew.

Witness a full size pirate ship perched on a semi and laden with 40 sunburned, oiled, cackling bodies hanging from rails singing “O Christmas Tree” at the top of their lungs. A temple, religious to none yet spiritual to all, reverently architected in the emptiness, writhing with revelers immersed in their own forgiveness.

A cowboy, sun scorched and smiling, wearing nothing but boots, a holster and his hat.

How about a 70’ x 300’ amoebic sculpture of 2x4s as if the Aroma Tacoma’s Paper Mill belched a symphony of pick up sticks on the Schuster Parkway.

At some point a giant wooden effigy of Man is set to flames, burns and an outburst of 60,000 people erupt into a night not one will forget â€" full on self expression, celebration and perhaps (just a little) decadence. Check out past Burning Man photos here.

If you’ve not been so lucky to experience this mind blowing self expression extravaganza in totally manufactured Black Rock City â€" ‘da middle of the 110 degree, alkaline lake bed desert in lizard loving Nevada.

You say you don’t like Hot, that’s why you live in the PNW.

You’re gonna like this kinda hot!

In short, at Burning Man (or ‘The Burn’ as one calls it nostalgically the second you smell the dust), ANYTHING goes. And does, 24/7, baby…

As long as there is NO MONEY exchanged, and no violence or lack of agreement.

Policed by feds, an enormous and profoundly effective volunteer force (and I mean FORCE), this joy ride offers the best medical care on the planet, yet you can purchase nothing.

Literally. Burning man is a “Leave No Trace Gifting” universe. If you break the rules, we break your stride, and anyone will report you can throw your ass out.

And we will.

Common courtesies, also known as The Law.

Pick up your shit. It’s called MOOP. I don’t care. Look it up.

Pick up everyone else’s shit. (Part of being a burner). We take the hell care of each other.

Learn it.

Live it.

Take it home with you.

Period.

Be nice.

Don’t try to sell anything or we will hunt you and find you. Everything in agreement; no tricky behavior or we will hunt and find you and take you to the Feds.

So, now you’ve been introduced to the concept of Burning Man.
(I hate that part. Impossible to explain. I had to do it pre-Burn because when I get there, I wont have time to fill your ass in on back story.)
More questions? Don’t ask me because I’m done with you for now.

Read the Spew tomorrow, or like yo mama used to say, “Look it the hell up!”
www.burningman.org

So, welcome to Burning Man.

My mind will be blown, and I’m thinking yours might be…intrigued.

A self stated Voyeur, I am lucky enough to partake.

Watch me via the Volcano, and share the tale.

Signed, POP

(= The pop of transformation, like a kernel of The Grand’s fabulous corn that I have for dinner often because I will never learn cook, oh, unless the Tacoma Gnome will have my baby.)

Ciao!

Filed under: Burning Man, Tacoma,
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