TACOMA'S BOYS OF SUMMER BATTING AROUND >>>

Last night, the Rainiers (26-33) won by a score of 24-3. We repeat: last night the Tacoma Rainiers won a nine-inning baseball game against the Tucson Padres by a score of 24-3.

Rather than rattle off a string of enthusiastic expletives to convey what we here at the Volcano feel about such an ass kicking, we thought some quotes from a Tuscon Padres' press release would better express the implications of such a beating. ...

"The Tacoma Rainiers batted around in four different innings Monday, beating the Tucson Padres 24-3. The loss established new marks for the Tucson Padres in runs allowed, hits allowed (22) and margin victory by an opponent...The Padres used a position player on the mound for the second consecutive night, with catcher Guillermo Quiroz pitching the ninth... Padres reliever Scott Munter was ejected in the seventh inning for arguing balls and strikes from the mound...."

And this is only a snippet. It neglects to mention that Michael Saunders went to bat an astounding seven times. It neglects to mention that every Tacoma batter except Luis Jimenez had at least one hit. It neglects to mention that the Rainiers have scored 40 runs in the past two days.

Oh, wait. The press release does mention that. But in our humble opinion, it should be mentioned at least twice. Because 40 runs in two games is crazy. Crazy.

-Perhaps the most telling incidence of the Rainiers' dominance over the past two games (the Rainiers lost the first game of the series 8-12) is the Padres calling on position players to pitch. In Sunday's 16-8 thumping at the hands of the Rainiers, the Padres used outfielder Bobby Kielty. Yesterday catcher Guillermo Quiroz took the ball. A catcher on the mound? The Padres were desperate. Imagine the Rainiers sending Josh Bard to the hill.

-Actually, Bard probably has a mean split-finger. What do you say, Mr. Manager Darren Brown? Send Bard in as a late inning set up man? It couldn't hurt. According to Curto, the Rainiers could use a little consistency in their pen.

-In other great news, outfielder Mike Carp was once again named the PCL Player of the Week. This is due in no small part to his twenty-one game hit streak, his multiple homeruns and his all around awesomeness. Our editor Matt ‘I think Carp should run for mayor' Driscoll suggested we devote another blog to Carp, but we decided otherwise. Barely decided otherwise.

-In future Rainier baseball news, the MLB draft started yesterday. The Seattle Mariners surprised many area bloggers by drafting 21-year-old left-hander Danny Hultzen. Right after the pick, the message boards lit up with hate and confusion; otherwise known as message boards as usual.

The Rainiers finish up their series against Tucson tonight at 7 p.m.. If the team continues its upward trend, the Rainiers will score roughly 36 runs in the ballgame. And since tonight is KRAFT singles Tuesday Night at the ballpark in Tucson, we wouldn't be surprised if the Rainiers hit a lot of singles. It would only be fitting.

LINK: The "Rainiers Minute" collection