January 6, 2012 at 1:57pm
WEEKLY VOLCANO WORLD NEWS >>>
Weekly Volcano Water Cooler manager Ted Augment opened and completely read today a spam email promising to add no less than two inches to his penis.
"This one actually sounds like it has some real science behind it," Augment said as he scrolled through the message - with the subject heading "Get a MONSTER ROD" - promoting herbal supplement Proverna, which claimed to "increase your pleasure -and hers - in less than a week!"
"I mean, check this out. Apparently this herb stimulates your abdominal muscles to contract more often, resulting in increased blood flow to the genital region, resulting in a thicker, longer erection," Augment said. "Kind of makes sense when you think about it."
After spending $82.99 on harmless fiber pills manufactured in Guam, Augment sent out an office-wide email stating the Washington Lottery has instigated a $2 Powerball game.
The $2 Powerball game story is actually not spam. Read the press release after the jump:
Olympia, Washington - Out with the old, and in with the new! This New Year, Washington's Lottery will begin offering the new $2 Powerball® game on Sunday, January 15, 2012, taking the place of the current $1 Powerball® game.
Powerball® is receiving a makeover across the nation. Washington's Lottery wants to make sure players in our state understand the changes taking place.
The overall odds of winning a prize will improve in the new Powerball® game, moving to 1 in 31.8 from 1 in 35.1. With the new $2 play, Powerball® will have starting jackpots of $40 million versus todays $20 million.
"Since 2010 Powerball® has offered Washingtonians the kind of jackpots that could be completely life-changing. You can only imagine how excited we are to continue to do this through the new $2 Powerball® game - except with bigger prizes, now players can imagine bigger." said Washington's Lottery Deputy Director Jim Warick.
The new Powerball® game will still offer players nine ways to win prizes, with its second tier prize moving up to $1 million in cash from the current $200,000, and the lowest tiered prize (for those who match just the Powerball) being elevated to $4 from the previous $3.
For more information about how to win and where to purchase tickets please visit www.walottery.com.
News and entertainment from Joint Base Lewis-McChord’s most awesome weekly newspapers - The Ranger, Northwest Airlifter and Weekly Volcano.
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