HEART DAY, FEB. 14, 2012 >>>

1. Cattle-prodding the oyster ditch with the lap rocket. Cannonballing the fiddlecove with a park steeple. Pulling the station wagon into the old creaky garage. No matter what clever name you have for it, sexual reproduction typically requires the involvement of two individuals or gametes, one each from opposite type of sex - although asexual reproduction, an individual can reproduce without involvement with another individual of that species. Oh, it's so confusing. At 6:30 p.m., University of Puget Sound biology professor Peter Wimberger will step in front of the Tacoma Science Café crowd at The Swiss and discuss the reproductive behavior of sea creatures. No word if Wimberger will show his anemone or flatworm. What?

2. Yes, the Museum of Glass Store is open today from 10 a.m. to 5 p.m. Yes, the store has all jewelry marked 20 percent off. And yes, you should be panicky if this is an issue for you.

3. According to the press release, Jilly Eddy - appearing at Morso from 6-9 p.m. as part of the wine bar's slew of Valentine's-related specials - is the world's leading expert in lip reading. In fact, Eddy is billed as a Lipsology Expert, which sounds pretty darn official. But we're not talking about deciphering the f-bombs dropped by coaches on the sidelines during the Super Bowl here. Rather, we're talking about reading and interpreting - quite literally - what peoples' lips say about their personalities.

4. Maybe you like your songs of romance to be sacred in nature? Perhaps you prefer them secular? Either way, according to the press release, the Canonici Vocal Quartet will have you covered on Valentines when the group busts out a collection of Renaissance love songs in English, French and Italian as part of the Classical Tuesdays in Old Town performance series, which begins at 7 p.m. inside the Old Town Slavonian Hall. Completely free - meaning you'll have more to spend on ridiculously priced flowers or stale chocolates - the Canonici Vocal Quartet's presentation of Plaisir d' Amour: The Pleasure of Love seems likely to seal at least a few deals this Valentine's Day.

5. Comedian Kermit Apio headlines a Valentine's Day "Clean Comedy Show" at 8 p.m. inside the Tacoma Comedy Club. The show benefits the House Of Matthews.

PLUS: Sweet & Spicy: A Valentine's Day Burlesques at the Pantages Theater

PLUS: Daniel Blue and Kurt Lindsay at Metronome Coffee

LINK: More arts and entertainment events in the South Sound

LINK: Live music and DJs tonight

LINK: South Sound happy hours

Filed under: 5 Things To Do, Arts, Classical music, Comedy, Holidays, Music, Rocket Science, Fashion, Gig Harbor, Tacoma,