Going to a sports bar usually means having some dude standing on your feet while you crane your neck and try to watch a TV because it's too loud to make any conversation. Triple Play Sports Bar on Tacoma's Sixth Avenue, on the other hand, never seems to get too crowded. Even when it is, there are three rooms - not counting the private karaoke lounge  - so it never becomes claustrophobic. Nine TVs are strategically placed, and a 10-foot projection screen blankets what was the original Hell's Kitchen's main music room.

Want to enjoy this entire splendor on the cheap?

Here's what you do: Burst through the doors like you own the place. Give bartender Jeanette Sullivan one of those cool hand shooters motions with a wink. Head to the black couch below the widescreen. When Sullivan approaches, ask her for the lunch menu then order a Long Island Iced Tea. From the couch you can watch her pour four bottles of booze in one shot. When she returns, pretend you are not shocked that all seven items on the lunch menu are $5 each. Even though you intend to order the delicious calzone with amazing dough made from 7 Seas Brewing beer, inquire about the $5 top sirloin burger, $5 grilled ham and cheese, $5 personal chef's salad, $5 turkey sandwich, two beef hot dogs for $5 and the $5 fish ‘n' chips. She's going to ask you if you'd like to add a side for $1. That's your call.

Kick back on the couch and enjoy.

Co-owner Rich Langhorn will approach you and ask if everything's cool. You'll give him one of those cool hand shooters motions with a wink. He'll laugh. You'll laugh. You'll then ask how the hell he stays afloat serving these full lunches for $5. He'll say he is indeed crazy and he's raising the price in several weeks to $6.50, but will include a side and non-alcoholic drink. You'll say you don't blame him, then tell him you don't drink anything without alcohol in it. You'll both laugh.

You'll hang for an hour, possibly two. Leave a tip and a smile to everyone on your way out. You'll feel fully satisfied that it cost half of what you would have enjoyed at another sports bar.

Now, let's talk why you put your feet on the couch. Honestly.

TRIPLE PLAY SPORTS BAR, 3829 Sixth Ave., Tacoma, 253.752.2800