No one asked me what my opinion of the latest American version of Godzilla was, but it was largely the same as everyone else's: eh. Not enough Bryan Cranston, the lead actor might as well have been that cardboard cutout in the background of Three Men and a Baby, and I was uncomfortable with the expressiveness of Godzilla's face. Still, it was inarguably better than Roland Emmerich's 1998 monstrosity, which means that it was a step in the right direction for healing to begin.

Even with the relatively good quality of Our American Godzilla (which is a spinoff that I'd like to copyright and pitch to the This American Life people), the fine people over at Japan's Toho Studios have decided to return to their radioactive creation, a decade after their Godzilla: Final Wars SKREEONKed onto screens. Toho has brought together a wonder team of executives and directors - a team they've dubbed the Godzilla Strategic Conference, or Godzi-con. With a release date set for 2016, Toho's Godzilla should arrive two years before our Godzilla 2 hits theaters.

SKREEONK, indeed.

Friday, Dec. 12-Saturday, Dec. 13: Rare Exports: A Christmas Tale

The one Christmas tradition that I can totally back is The Grand Cinema's annual showings of the delightfully demented Finnish film, Rare Exports: A Christmas Tale. The new holiday classic is a pulpy, darkly comic take on what is essentially the Krampus mythology, where Santa isn't so jolly and children are dirty little urchins that deserve to be punished. The horror comedy is a gorgeously shot descent into yuletide madness, and it is a wonder to see on The Grand's (relatively) big screens. It's only shown in Tacoma two days a year, so see it while you can. It'll make you rethink candy canes.

Tuesday, Dec. 16: A Brief History of Time

Stephen Hawking has recently expressed interest in playing a Bond villain. That's it. Just wanted to tell you that.

It wouldn't be too much of a stretch, because everything has been coming up Hawking this year. The physicist was a guest vocalist on Pink Floyd's latest album, and the story of his life, The Theory of Everything, is the Oscar bait the world needs, not the one it deserves. In conjunction with his biopic playing at The Grand Cinema, the theater has decided to screen the 1991 Hawking documentary, A Brief History of Time, for its Tuesday Film Series. Directed by the great documentarian Errol Morris, the film is an exploration of the man and his work, with presumably a little more accuracy than The Theory of Everything.

There are two screenings on Tuesday, but the 6:45 one will be followed by a discussion of both the documentary and the biopic. The discussion will be led by ... David Gilmour? It can't possibly be that David Gilmour, but you never know. Stephen Hawking and Pink Floyd are apparently tight.