SATURDAY, MAY 21, 2011 >>>

1. Brownie Morrison novelty store focuses on the wackiest and weirdest of pop-culture merchandising, and that's a whole lot more fun than a drinking mug shaped like a breast. A recent visit turned up Really Positive Energy Breathspray, "Sometimes I love you so much I want to cry and rub margarine all over my gums" greeting cards, and Ken dolls having fun in cars. Even if you don't buy a thing, just walking around the store is a blast. From noon to 5 p.m. Brownie Morrison celebrates its new location at 2913 S. 38^th St. with a grand opening party featuring a Flying Monkey giveaway every 20 minutes.

2. As the major military installation in the Tacoma/Lakewood area, Joint Base Lewis-McChord will celebrate Armed Forces Day from 10 a.m. to 6 p.m. at Cowan and Memorial Stadiums on Lewis Main. Highlighting the celebration will be military displays, historical re-enactors, carnival rides and the emotionally moving Massing of the Color Ceremony. The public is cordially invited; admission is free.  To enter JBLM, visitors must use Interstate 5, Exit 119. Parking and shuttle services will be available.

3. There is no formula for creating an iconic image of an age or event. Certain images simply touch a nerve. Such is the case with Norman Rockwell's painting of 6-year-old Ruby Bridges being escorted by U.S. marshals into William Frantz Public School in New Orleans in 1960. It was not the first school to be desegregated, nor the most famous (that honor belongs to Central High School in Little Rock, Ark., in 1957), but Rockwell's painting stands as a major icon of the civil rights movement. And the little girl, now almost 60 years old, remains a civil rights activist. At 2 p.m., Bridges will be at Philip Hall on the University of Washington-Tacoma campus ($5-$15) to share her story about those tumultuous times. To read up on Bridges and the Norman Rockwell show at the Tacoma Art Museum, click here.

4. Some otherwise normal folks harbor a deep knot of fear in their souls: They're petrified of yoga. If this is you, we suggest you head over to the University Place Library at 3 p.m. and listen to author Claire Dederer discuss her new book Poser: My Life in Twenty-Three Yoga Poses.

5. The Comedy Underground presents funny guy Gabriel Rutledge at 8:30 and 10:30 p.m. in the basement of the Big Whisky Saloon.

PLUS: The Whiz: Cascadia and Dockyard Derby Dames bout go down today. More details on these two events in our Weekend Hustle.

LINK: More arts and events in the South Sound

LINK: Wine tastings!

ROCK! >>>

I literally did a double take. Looking at the show poster for this Saturday night at Hell's Kitchen, one thing floored me more than anything else. It's especially impressive considering the bill - featuring Zeke, the Lemons (yes, THE the Lemons), Poppa Wheelie (yes, THE Poppa Wheelie) and Mahnhammer - had almost nothing to do with it.

The show marks the celebration of Hell's Kitchen's nine-year anniversary.

Nine fucking years.

I had to sit and ponder that one for a minute ... really recollect. Nine years of Hell's Kitchen. That's a long-ass time. It means I've been doing this for a long-ass time. It means we've all been doing this for a long-ass time ...

"The best part has been bringing in my friends' bands and having a good place for them to play in Tacoma," Flash, the man behind Hell's Kitchen, told me in 2003, when the flames on the walls of the predominantly punk and metal venue were still fresh. Hell's Kitchen was celebrating its first anniversary at the time. The article ran in a paper that doesn't even exist anymore. Hell's Kitchen has since moved to Pacific Avenue.

"I'm proud we put Tacoma back on the map," the quote finishes.

To read Matt Driscoll's full article on the Hell's Kitchen nine-year anniversary show, including interviews with Jimmy Paulson of the Lemons, Donny Hales of Zeke and Cody Foster of Poppa Wheelie, click here.

[Hell's Kitchen, 9-Year Anniversary Show, with Zeke, The Lemons, Poppa Wheelie, Mahnhammer, 9 p.m., $9, 928 Pacific Ave., Tacoma, 253.759.6003]

SATURDAY, APRIL 23, 2011 >>>

1. Don't you just hate Vancouver, B.C. with its international vibe, beautiful surrounding landscape, dim sum, and awesome herbal jazz cigarettes? Wouldn't you like to see representatives from the Canadian city elbowed in the gut? The Dockyard Derby Dames' all-star team, Wave of Mutilation, are rolling out the track for their first home bout against Vancouver's Terminal City Rollergirls at 6 p.m. on the Pierce College campus in Lakewood.

2. Step back into a time before Lindsay Lohan, before Twitter - before Maverick hit on the frigid, man-faced Kelly McGillis and eventually has PG-rated sex with her while the lead singer of '80s pop band Berlin encouraged an unseen lover to take her breath away (which one hoped he would do before we had to listen to one more emotionless note emerge from her wretched glottis) - by visiting the Fort Nisqually Living History Museum today from 11 a.m. to 4 p.m. Reenactors and docents will provide glimpses into a time when the Pacific Northwest was British-held territory as part of the "Sewing to Sowing Living History Day." Fort Nisqually, which was located in present-day DuPont, was the headquarters of the Puget Sound Agricultural Company. Now located in Tacoma's Point Defiance Park, the fort acts as a living museum of the way things were.

3. With no words and no motorized vehicles (except wheelchairs), the annual Procession of the Species is a celebration of Earth Day, green power, the web of life ... you name it. It's also the year's best people-watching opportunity, particularly those people who just wake up the morning of the event and throw something together so they can walk in the procession. For the hip and sardonic, it doesn't get much better than the 4:30 p.m. parade from Cherry and Legion to Heritage Park in downtown Olympia.

4. From 5-8 p.m., The Space owner Athena Hitson presents Sugar & Spikes, a group exhibition featuring Robert Evans, Jeremy Gregory and Geoffrey Weeg. According to the press release, "Athena's goal in presenting Sugar & Spikes is to share challenging, amusing and emotive artwork inspired by love and fear, the two emotions that rule the world. The works by Robert Evans, Jeremy Gregory and Geoffrey Weeg - three of the region's most exciting artists - move beyond simple aesthetics and strive to authentically illustrate the two emotions that rule the world." At 8:30 p.m., Maus Haus, Check Please and others will rock The space.

5. Tacoma PFLAG (Parents, Families and Friends of Lesbians and Gays) hosts Rainbows Over Tacoma 2011 tonight at the Washington State History Museum. With entertainment from Kim Archer, Sylvia O'Stayformore, the Seattle Women Chorus' Sensible Shoes and Oasis Youth, expect an evening full of music and smiles - all for a good cause. Entertainment runs from 7 - 9 p.m., but stop by the museum early, starting at 6 p.m., to tour the exhibits before the show.

LINK: More arts and entertainment events in the South Sound

LINK: Wine tastings!

SHAKING IN THE SOUTH SOUND >>>

Do you know, according to the Pacific Northwest Seismic Network, there have been more than 35 earthquakes in Washington State just in the last two weeks?

Do you know we live near one of the most hazardous faults in the world?

Do you know this particular fault line - the Cascadia Subduction Zone - is aching to release a megathrust earthquake?

Now, imagine this fault ruptures and a 9.0 magnitude earthquake violently shakes the Pacific Northwest.

"It would be like a freakishly monstrous catapult that hurls 75,000 square miles of rock, the margin of a continent, as much as 65 feet," says Patrick Pringle, associate professor of Earth Sciences at Centralia College, national author and overall geo-enthusiast.

To read Nikki Talotta's full article click here.

BUMMER >>>

As a kid who grew up in Puyallup smoking weed out of Mountain Dew cans and requesting songs off Weezer's Pinkerton record (along with plenty of Murder City Devils and Supersuckers) on KGRG, 89.9FM - Green River Community College's radio station - this email pained me to receive today ...

After 22 years of playing Today's Rock and 36+ years on the air overall, 89.9 KGRG-FM, Auburn, will be shutting down its aging transmitter this afternoon, Thursday, April 7^th, at 3pm PDT.   On behalf of all the broadcasting students and our staff, we thank you and our audience for the support over the years.

Tune in 89.9FM (also streaming live audio at www.kgrg.com) at 3pm PDT today as we wrap up an historic chapter in college broadcasting.  Long live Today's Rock!

Tom

Tom Evans Krause

Director of Broadcast Operations/Instructor

KGRG-AM & FM

Green River Community College

12401 SE 320th Street

Auburn, WA  98092

253-833-9111 x2190

tkrause@greenriver.edu

MONDAY, MARCH 21, 2011 >>>

1. Filmmaker Russ Meyer more often than not had to deal with obscenity charges, outcries from feminists and objections from stuffy-ass critics who called Meyer and his fans "demented hillbillies." But as a filmmaker, Meyer was more of a tease than the women who starred in his films. The Tacoma Cult Movie Club will celebrate Meyer and his genius at 7 p.m. when they host "Happy Birthday, Russ Meyer (Show Us Your Tits!)" mini-film fest at the Acme Grub Cage. As at all TCMC events, they'll be plenty of shorts, trailers, commercials and popcorn.

2. The Washington State Capital Museum hosts "After Suffrage: Voting Washington Women Change History," a special lecture by Shanna Stevenson, Interpretive Women's History Consortium program coordinator for the Washington State Historical Society. The noon lecture will look forward from the Washington Women's Centennial in 2010 and will discuss how women's right to vote affected the political and social agenda in Washington, particularly from 1910 to 1920. 

3. Weekly Volcano's Alec Clayton is the best art critic on four continents. He's slowly earning notoriety on the others. Clayton is also a damn fine novelist. Comic Books Ink hosts a 7 p.m. staged reading from Clayton's latest novel Reunion at the Wetside featuring the talents of local actors Dennis Rolly at "the author," Chris Cantrell as crime reporter Harry Drews, Jim Patrick as Jim Bright, and Jennie Jenks as Alex Martin. A Q&A and book signing will follow the reading.

4. Traditions Cafe and World Folk Art in Olympia hosts the Uke & Singalong featuring Steve Einhorn, Kate Power at 7 p.m.

5. Dana Nicole, back in Tacoma after hanging out on Maui for four years, sings and performs covers and originals on the piano every Monday at 7:30 p.m. inside The New Frontier Lounge.

LINK: More arts and entertainment events in the South Sound

GRAB A SANDWICH AND SEARCH THE INTERNET FOR PRETTY ART >>>

Getting in didactic mode here, I pose the rhetorical question: Who are the greatest artists in the world and how do you make that call?

For starters, there is no way I can list the greatest artists of all time without leaving out a lot who deserve to be listed, and there is no way I can do it in the space allowed. So I'm going to make this a two-part article. I think the basic answer to how to make that call must revolve around (1) the artist's immediate and lasting impact (does his work elevate the human spirit or change lives for the better?), and (2) his influence on other artists or future generations.

I'm going to list my choices for the greatest artists in chronological order. That means I have to start with unknown artists because nobody knows who created most of the earliest know art in the world. Prior to the classical Greek period individual artists were not considered important and many works of art may have been group efforts.

The oldest work of art to have a lasting influence is The Venus of Willendorf, a statue of a woman by an unknown artist or artists circa 30,000-25,000 B.C. It's a tiny little figure of a naked woman with huge breasts and belly. It can be held in the palm of the hand, yet it looks monumental. This ancient artifact has influenced such modern artists as Picasso, Brancusi, Henry Moore and Willem de Kooning (see de Kooning's Woman I).

Other ancient works of art that remain breathtakingly powerful today are the Easter Island monoliths and the Sphinx in Egypt circa 2500 B.C. These were definitely not done by individuals. Their visual impact rivals some of the largest and most ambitious of modern earthworks and environmental installations.

Perhaps the first sculptures to foretell modern art were those of classical Greece. Among the best of those epitomizing the era was Diskobolos, aka the Discus Thrower, created in 450 B.C. The Contrapposto contortions of the body convey strength and elegance and movement at rest by capturing a momentary pause in action, something a later artist, Michelangelo Buonarroti, borrowed from the Greeks.

From unknown ancient artists let's skip ahead to the early and late Renaissance when artists became rock stars. Among the earliest and greatest of these was Netherlandish painter Jan Van Eyck. Van Eyck and other Northern Renaissance artists were known for their stiffly posed figures, amazing detail and flawless brushwork. They were among the first artists to depict the actual world in a realistic manner. Van Eyck's paintings shone a brilliant light on the everyday world of the Netherlands. Of course by today's standards everything in his paintings was contrived. His world was prettified, everything just so, meaning in many ways he was among the first painters to compose and not just depict figures and objects. Paintings such as The Arnolfini Marriage and The Madonna of Chancellor Rolin are just as beautiful today as they were almost 600 years ago.

Moving ahead to the 16th century, none can compare with Michelangelo. The stupendous achievement of the Sistine Chapel ceiling and The Last Judgment fresco on the end wall are among the greatest works of art ever created by anyone, and his sculptures are breathtaking. I remember an art teacher not too long ago comparing the linear composition of Michelangelo's David to works by Picasso and other moderns. Strictly speaking there can't be linear structure in a sculpture in the round, and yet it is there and thoroughly modern in every contour from every angle.

By the way, I am omitting some of the most popular Renaissance artists, notably Botticelli and Raphael, and the great Leonardo da Vinci, because I personally find the former two too sweetly romantic and because da Vinci's greatness rests on many things in addition to his art. Frankly I was never too impressed by his most famous works, The Last Supper and Mona Lisa.

Finally, before coming to the modern era (coming soon), I have to mention two of my favorite post-Renaissance painters, Caravaggio and Rembrandt. You can't beat them for stark and unflinching realism, dramatic play of light and dark, the strength of their images (particularly Rembrandt's warts-and-all self-portraits and Caravaggio's extreme foreshortening of muscular, Michelangelo-like men).

Unless you can afford to travel, you can't see work by many of the artists mentioned here. Fortunately you can see them on the World Wide Web, and I encourage you to take some time to do so.

MONDAY, FEB. 21, 2011 >>>

1. Dr. Michael Allen, author of A Patriot's History of the United States:  From Columbus' Great Discovery to the War on Terror, will lecture on "The Formative Years of Presidents Truman and Reagan" at 1 p.m. inside the Washington State Capital Museum.

2. When Rep. Dennis Kucinich (D-Ohio) rolls into the Capitol Theater at 3 p.m. to give a lecture on "The True Cost of War," he will arrive with antiwar bona fides unmatched in any recent Congress. Last March, he put a resolution on the floor of the House of Representatives that would have required all American troops out of Afghanistan by 2011. Though the resolution was soundly defeated, it did get 65 votes; public support for the war has dwindled. Read our full article, with an interview with Kucinich, here.

3. The Graphic Novel Book Club will discuss It Was the War of the Trenches by Jacques Tardi over craft cocktails insid3 the 1022 Lounge beginning at 7 p.m.

4. Water Island (Ashley & Eli of LAKE) join Motorbikes and Takhoma for an 8 p.m. all-ages show at Northern in Olympia.

5. Son Jack Jr. and Michael Wild will fill the Harmon Brewery and Eatery with blues beginning at 8 p.m.

LINK: More arts and entertainment events in the South Sound

HEART DAY, FEB. 14, 2011 >>>

1. Today is Valentine's Day, the most romantic and stressful time of year for men. Poor guys. We don't envy you. This is the day you dread all year. Trying to figure out what to do, what not to say, how to dress and where to go. We suggest you take her to see Olympia's aerial sweethearts from the Tallhouse Arts Consortium hang above The Brotherhood Lounge beginning at 8 p.m.  The aerial artists will be joined by jugglers, magicians, and contortionists. That should take the attention off you, you poor bastard.

2. Ryan Karlson, the Interpretive Program manager of the Washington State Parks and Recreation Commission, will lecture on the Civilian Conservation Corps at noon inside the Washington State Capital Museum. His lecture will highlight the accomplishments of the CCC and the lasting benefits of their work, including local examples such as Millersylvania State Park.

3. The Seattle Guitar Orchestra will serenade folks inside St. John's Episopal Church in Gig Harbor beginning at 7 p.m.

4. Northern's Dory and Devon present a monthly anthology of short animations and experimental films, which they call "Northern Flickers." This month brings a special Valentine's Day edition, which promises "blue movies for lovers and asexuals alike" from 7-9 p.m. Um, what? The invite implies we'll be seeing what are essentially porno clips of cats, ferns, Christmas tree ornaments and classic cartoon characters. Oh, and somehow, like all other Northern events, it's all-ages. But "there will be chocolate," so we guess that makes it all OK.

5. Harmon Brewery and Restaurant offers a special Valentine's Day dinner for two menu with the added bonus of Maia Santell and House Blend singing jazz and blues love songs beginning at 8 p.m.

LINK: More arts and entertainment events in the South Sound

WEDNESDAY, FEB. 2, 2011 >>>

1. Nobunny (aka Justin Champlin) is all about fusing punk energy with older modes of songwriting, resulting in superheated garage music with a delectable rawness that more than makes up for its lack of innovation. His live shows are sweaty, libidinous insanity as he cavorts around in a freakish bunny mask, American Apparel underwear, stylin' denim jacket and little else. Catch Nobunny with Hari Kari and Dreamdate at 8 p.m. at Olympia all-ages venue Northern.

2. The Tacoma Wheelmen Bicycle Club's Fairly Fast 40 has nothing to do with Olde English 800 and everything to do with a fast-paced, hilly, 40-mile training ride leaving the Proctor District Starbucks at 9:30 a.m.

3. Wrapped: The Search for the Essential Mummy welcomes Washington State History Museum visitors from 10 a.m. to 5 p.m. to "an outstanding piece of ancient Egyptian history, [and] an iconic element of Tacoma's history." Read what this means here.

4. Here's a tiny preview of Tiny Furniture playing at 9 p.m. at the Capitol Theater in Olympia: This low-budget dramedy from writer-director Lena Dunham - who also portrays Aura, a recent college grad who returns home while she tries to figure out what to do with her life - is a piece of skillful social anthropology, capturing the characters' artistic, privileged Manhattan milieu.

5. Oritaks Indrome, Discordem, Blood Of Rome and Echoreason will rock your skull beginning at 9 p.m. inside Hell's Kitchen.

LINK: More arts and entertainment events in the South Sound

LINK: Wine and beer tastings