THE WEEK'S FREEBIES JULY 18-25 >>>

If legendary cowboy Shane were in the South Sound for the week, he might ride along the Puyallup river, past Eric Anderson's moving van, past the ships docked along Schuster Parkway, around the sewer work at the closed Puget Gulch, then hitch his horse outside the future site of the Tacoma Food Co-Op, jump on the phone and help the Co-Op reach its fundraising goal. He would end his night at neighboring The Red Hot with a spirited game of Dominos, and then fall happily asleep next to the outdoor fireplace at Hotel Murano. He would wake up naturally the next day at sunrise, and do it all over again, adding a stack of flapjacks from Old Milwaukee Cafe and the free events listed below to his routine.

MONDAY 7-18: The week starts off on a wild note when the Tacoma Cult Movie Club presents a night of films centered around the theme: "He's A Very Naughty Boy - You Might Want To Give This Bad Boy A Spanking" beginning at 7 p.m. inside The Acme Grub Cage. We have no idea what that means, but we're sure Shane would side with TCMC co-producers Rev. Colin and Mat Hat Tobin.

TUESDAY 7-19: Shane might head toward American Lake Park for the rootin'-tootin'-est Lakewood's Brightest Star local talent competition finals at 6:30 p.m. Shane would do what comes natural, shooting his guns in the air after every song. No one in the crowd would flinch. 

WEDNESDAY 7-20: Shane's personal repression and remorse could surface if he attended Author Chellis Swenson Jensen reading of her book, Meet Mrs. Annathena Gilly Gully From Puddle Rumple Tilly Willy, at 10:30 a.m. inside the Garfield Book Company in Parkland. Afterward, all the kids would yell "Shane, come back!" but only because the cowboy stole their temporary tattoo stickers. Also Wednesday, Abby Road Live Beatles tribute band at Pioneer Park in Steilacoom from 6:30-8:30 p.m.

THURSDAY 7-21: Shane would have to push his horse Thursday. Naturally, Shane would attend the screening of archival films showing Schafer Brothers Logging Company operations in the 1920s at 7 p.m. inside the bitchin' new University Place Library. Shane would irritate the crowd with his mouth harp. Next, he'd gallop toward Tollefson Plaza before the 8:30 p.m. showing of this year's "Best of The Grand's 72 Hour Film Competition" on a giant outdoor screen. Afterward, he'd discover sake at neighboring TWOKOI Japanese Restaurant and spent the rest of the night on guard at the base of the 20-foot high welcome figure.

FRIDAY 7-22: The man, the myth, the legend, would probably make an appearance at the free outdoor screening of Shane at Donkey Creek Park in Gig Harbor at 9 p.m. No doubt Shane would be forced to spend the night in a Gig Harbor slammer because of his inability to deal rationally with the Good To Go system.

SATURDAY 7-23: At 2 p.m. Shane would rope his horse in front of King's Books for Gudrun Aurand's class on repairing torn paper. Fascinated with King's owner sweet pea's outfit of the day, the two probably would become close friends baking muffins into the wee hours. Also Saturday, Tacoma's EnviroHouse hosts a free 10:30 a.m. workshop titled "Garden Design, Soils & Pest Management."

SUNDAY 7-24: Someone Shane would get bit during NADOi endorsed dog trainer Jeanne Hampf's 1 p.m. free workshop on "How to Keep Your Dog Happy and Safe at the Dog Park" at the Gig Harbor Branch Library. Slumped over on his horse, Shane would follow the same path that he took entering the South Sound.

LINK: More arts and entertainment events in the South Sound

LINK: Live music and DJs in the South Sound

WE'RE A BIG BOY NOW >>>

The Weekly Volcano's "personal" Facebook page is closing in on FB's 5,000 friends limit. Holy wow is right. We've started a "fan" page, which will allow us to compile as many friends/fans as technologically possible. If you're on FB and dig the Volcano's posts, quips, discoveries and news breaks – as well as content that doesn't appear either online or in print – go to facebook.com/weeklyvolcanofanpage and please "like" us.

Bonus: To make you really "like" us, we will enter those who "like" us before 5 p.m. Wednesday, June 8 into a random drawing for a free one night stay for two in a King Deluxe Room at the Hotel Murano. You will need to redeem the room before June 30, 2011.

The new Weekly Volcano Facebook page will also be your guide to exclusive Weekly Volcano events, promotions, blogs and photos.

Thank you!

LINK: Like us

THE POLLS ARE NOW OPEN >>>

Spring is in the air.

This means lust is in the air - and in the pages of the Weekly Volcano.

Once again, the Volcano is unleashing The Sexy Issue, giving one and all the chance to gaze at the sexiest people in the South Sound - as voted on by all of you, our dear readers.

Our annual celebration of the flesh, The Sex Issue is the Weekly Volcano's way of showcasing the South Sound's sexiest denizens - and by denizens we don't mean celebrities; we're talking about regular dudes and dudettes who just happen to look sexy as hell. Not just cliché sex appeal, of no relation to AXE Deodorant Body Spray campaigns, and certainly much more than mere looks, the Volcano Sexy Issue attempts to answer simple question: What defines sexiness in the South Sound?

This year, we are asking you to nominate the person who makes you all hot and bothered in the following categories: Bartender, Barista, Delivery Person, Real Estate Agent, Athlete, Servicemember, Drummer, Tattoo Artist and Mom.

On Thursday, June 2, the Weekly Volcano will publish The Sexy Issue, immortalizing the sexy, chosen few forever.

Help us find them.

Voting ends May 12 - so help the Weekly Volcano find the South Sound's hottest citizens. Vote today!

Vote for the South Sound's sexiest people (please include where they work):

ACCESS SOUTH SOUND DRINK SPECIALS IN THE PALM OF YOUR HAND >>>

The Weekly Volcano Happy Hour App has up-to-date listings of happy-hour offerings from bars, clubs, taverns and restaurants from Tumwater to Federal Way, from Gig Harbor to Bonney Lake. As of now, some 160 happy hours are listed - with more being added on a constant basis.

Your smart phone tells the app where you are, you specify any special happy-hour needs you might have, and - voilà - you've got a detailed list of every happy hour around, including specials and when that happy hour ends. The list is sorted by distance from your current location, and you can turn your phone sideways for a Google map of the nearest picks. Can't decide which one to try? Give the phone a good shake and the app will randomly select a happy hour for you.

The Weekly Volcano Happy Hour app is available for iPhone, Android and Blackberry. And no matter what platform you use, it's free - so you can save your money for that last half-price margarita or two-for-one beer special of the night.

The Happy Hour section at weeklyvolcano.com has been redesigned to carry the same information as the phone app.

More good news: Because the Weekly Volcano has partnered with GoTime.com, our happy hour app doesn't only work in the South Sound; it also works in 160 other cities around the country.

LINK: Download the app to your phone

LINK: Our new nifty happy hour section

LINK: Scenes from the App Launch Party

Here's something to watch

YOGURT AND COFFEE - A NEW CONCEPT >>>

Neighborhood:  Ft. Steilacoom Park

Address:  8520 Steilacoom Blvd. SW, Lakewood, 253.292.1260

Hours:  6 a.m. to 10 p.m., seven days a week

Standard Cup of Joe:  $3

Bean Source:  They grind Dillano coffee.

Crowd:  Everyone from eigth to 80 for the coffee and yogurt.  "We'll serve anyone and provide a great coffee and or yogurt experience," says owner Jesse Roberge.

WiFi:  Oh yeah.

Noshing/Sipping:  Traditional espresso drinks.  Also, six types of yogurts with more than 25 different toppings are available.

Bonus:  Spotless place with a courteous staff imbued with the attitude of providing the customer with a great experience.  Roomy, nicely lit and a fireplace welcome those who want to sit with friends and talk.

LINK: South Sound Restaurant Guide

LET'S DO THIS 2011 THING >>>

Ah, the sweet artificiality of the New Year - the reassurance of a clean calendar, of resolutions for self-improvement. And then you pick up the newspaper, and that pure artifice of the change of year, that vagarious demarcation of another arbitrary moment, is rendered meaningless by the inexorably continuing chains of events that know no boundaries defined by pages in a calendar. (Remember, the Chinese and the Jews have their own calendars, no less arbitrary, no more meaningful.)  It's no wonder revelers seem to work so hard trying to have a good time as the countdowns begin.

We here at the Weekly Volcano and Spew hope you had a nice holiday season and we wish you the best all year around.

HO HO HO >>

Every year our Christmas dinner has one flaw.  We have no gripes about eating the same menu annually - ham with cherry sauce, green bean casserole, twice-baked potatoes, and freshly baked rolls. It's the Jell-O salad that gets us. 

Our mom makes a strange concoction of dark cherry Jell-O with Coca-Cola and bits of cream cheese, which is not as bad as it sounds, but she serves us a slab on top of a piece of iceberg lettuce.  The lettuce is our mom's way of dressing up a barren salad plate, but the lettuce taste is transferred to the Jell-O.  We end up eating lettuce-flavored Jell-O, and trust us we've protested. 

As we gather around the Christmas dinner table with family and friends - feeling fortunate to even have food, family and friends - no doubt we'll have Jell-O on lettuce again.  We'll eat it, with a smile

What ever this day brings you, the Weekly Volcano staff wishes you a merry one. As always, thanks for reading, commenting and joining the fun. Cheers!

WEDNESDAY, OCT. 13, 2010 >>>

1. When it comes right down to it, few things in this world can top a freshly poured, frosty barley pop. We're referring to beer, of course, and it's way more than a delicious sexual stimulant/memory eraser . . . beautiful beer is an art form unto itself. In keeping with its tradition of promoting awareness and appreciation of this heavenly beverage, the Weekly Volcano reminds you that the Parkway Tavern hosts its annual Jubelpalooza at 6 p.m. featuring Jubel Ale '08, '09 and '10, Nitro '09, cask '09, Super Jubel '08 and '10, Abyss '09, Black Butte 21 and Mirror Mirror.

2. Bead artist Keiko will demonstrate her live torch techniques for contemporary bead making from 11 a.m. to 4 p.m. inside the Museum of Glass' Hot Shop.

3. Dakota Bob & The Business Man Blues Band perform at 7 p.m. inside A Rhapsody In Bloom Florist & Cafe Latte on Sixth Avenue in Tacoma.

4. Appalled by the horrors of local dog fighting in Afghanistan, Pen Farthing and his troop of young Royal Marines had no choice but to intervene. Soon, the Marines operated a makeshift pound. Farthing wrote about the experience in his book, One Dog at a Time: Saving the strays of Afghanistan, which he'll discuss at 7 p.m. inside the Moore Library in Tacoma.

5. Dave Welch, past president of the Museum Association and the Oregon and California Trails Association, will speak about the Oregon Trail and show an award winning film about students who traveled by wagon train like 19th century pioneers, at 7 p.m. inside the Steilacoom Historical Museum.

LINK: More arts and entertainment events in the South Sound

RAMPING UP FOR OUR ANNUAL ARTS GUIDE >>>

Whoa, check out the calendar. Fall is on the way. And with the fall comes a slew of fun things to do, buy, eat, hear and more.

Our annual Fall Arts Guide will hit the South Sound streets Thursday, Sept. 9 chocked full of dance, theater, classical music, visual arts, literary suggestions - as well as where to eat and drink before and after the performances.

Added bonus: Tacoma artist Lance Kagey will design the guide's cover.

If you’re a South Sound arts organization, please send us your entire season's calendar here. We don’t want to leave anyone out. Please submit schedules by Friday, Aug. 27.

If you would like to support the Weekly Volcano's keepsake Fall Arts Guide, and reach our powerful, niche market, contact our advertising department at 253.584.1212 or by e-mail here.

Look for the Fall Arts Guide in the Weekly Volcano and at your favorite hangout Sept. 9.

LIVE MUSIC HIGHLIGHTS TONIGHT IN THE SOUTH SOUND >>>

A Rhapsody In Bloom Florist and Cafe Latte Tacoma - Sixth Avenue. Whateverly Brothers. All Ages. 7 pm. NC.

Hell's Kitchen Tacoma - Downtown. Sean Wheeler & Zander Schloss, James Hunnicutt, Abi Grace, Mr. Plow. 21+. 9 pm. $5.

Kamel Toe Bar and Grill Tacoma - Parkland. Jam Night. Features members of Kashmire, Soul Stripper and special guests. 21+. 9 pm. NC.

Le Voyeur Café and Lounge Olympia - Downtown. John Calvin, Lozen. 21+. 9 pm.

Mandolin Cafe Tacoma - Central. Savannah. All Ages. 7 pm. NC. Raymond Hayden & The Dark Drive Home. All Ages. 8 pm. NC.

Northern Olympia - Downtown. Cotton Jones, Parson Red Head, Quiet Life. All Ages. 7 pm.

• Travel and transition. Weary miles on the road and brief stops of respite, enjoying truck stop beauty or the way taking three steps back from a chugging city can reveal a majesty normally reserved for nature. Country. Folk. Pop. And especially melodies. Cotton Jones, naturally on tour and headed to Olympia on a Wednesday night, posses all of it. With a new record soon to be released on Suicide Squeeze, Tall Hours in the Glowstream, band pillars Michael Nau and Whitney McGraw, both originally from Western Maryland, and with a musical connection built on an intriguingly mysterious relationship (a kind of Jack and Meg White feeling), Cotton Jones has been all over, seen most everything and has the sun-faded and wise sound to prove it. Check this band out. - Matt Driscoll
  

Pioneer Park Steilacoom. Summer Concert Series, featuring Darren Motamedy. All Ages. 6:30 pm. NC.

Sax Restaurant and Lounge Tacoma - Sixth Avenue. Olivia De La Cruz. The guitarist, singer/songwriter performs during dinner. All Ages. 7-9 pm. Free.

LINK: More live music and DJs tonight in the South Sound