MICHAEL SWAN: WEDNESDAY, NOV. 9, 2009 >>>

1. "Take the prankster chutzpah of Sacha Baron Cohen. Pair it with Michael Moore's crusading lefty outrage. Add two frazzled-looking guys in cheap suits. What do you get? The Yes Men Fix The World" - screening at 9 p.m. inside the Capitol Theater.

2. A Concise History of Northwest Art is a big, big, big show - parts of which should appeal to everyone since it has photography, painting, sculpture, jewelry, glass and ceramics covering Northwest art history since the 19th century, including art from Washington, Oregon, Idaho, Montana and even British Columbia and Alaska - runs from 10 a.m. to 5 p.m. at the Tacoma Art Museum.

3. The Tacoma loving Love Tacoma club hosts its December event at Enoteca, the wine bar adjacent to the Tacoma Wine Merchants in the Stadium District, beginning at 5:30 p.m.

4. Tacoma Little Theatre stage's Jean Shepherd's A Christmas Story at 7:30 p.m.

5. Jonny Smokes performs at 9 p.m. inside the Kamel Toe club in Parkland.

LINK: Live music and DJs in the South Sound

LINK: Local movie starting times

LINK: South Sound Restaurant Guide

MATT DRISCOLL: BRING ON THE WEEKEND >>>

Ah, the prefunk - a calm before the storm and a time to prime yourself for the coming party. Whether you specifically refer to it as a "prefunk" or not, nearly everyone - or everyone the Weekly Volcano rolls with, that is - engages in some sort "prefunk" activity.

It reminds me of the time my dad started chugging his beer at the Gorge right before the Who came on - he said he wanted to "reach his peak" right as Townshend and Co. hit the stage.* He was over fifty, severely balding, and he didn't know it - but he was prefunking.

The aim of this column, like my dad's chugged beer at the Gorge, is to get you ready for the coming weekend.

Here's a look at a couple events down tonight and tomorrow night in the South Sound, and some advice on how you might want to consider getting ready for them.

Friday Night

Poona the Fuckdog at Midnight Sun in Olympia

First of all, it's a play - not a cheaply made adult film produced in Enumclaw. The dedicated folks at Theater Artists Olympia - who pride themselves on producing theater that's not boring, regurgitated, cliché garbage - are unleashing this beast on non-offendable minds just in time for the holidays - and it couldn't be more appropriate. Expect copious amounts of aliens, shrubs, salesmen and vagina references. Poona the Fuckdog opened last night, and runs through Dec. 20. Tonight's show at Midnight Sun (113 N Columbia St., Olympia) starts at 8 p.m.

Prefunk Suggestion: Smoke out in your car right before walking in. You'll smell like most people from Olympia, and the filthy jokes will be all the more hilarious.

Saturday Night

Motopony and Battersea at Jazzbones in Tacoma

Daniel Blue seems to be the most controversial dude in Tacoma these days - or close to it, anyway. Our late October cover story on the new Motopony record has the Internet comments to prove it. It seems nearly everyone has an opinion on Mr. Blue, which makes Motopony's Saturday night show at Jazzbones all the more interesting. Will Blue ride to the stage on his scooter, like he did at the CD release show at Urban Grace? Or will he show up with a sleazy bachelorette party in a stretch Hummer limo and make his way to the stage only after stumbling on his face thanks to a pair of slutty high heels - as is the usual entrance at Jazzbones? Only time will tell. Saturday's show starts at 7 p.m.

Prefunk Suggestion: Snort lines of irony off the 253 Heart and then head to the Boneyard to get wasted on PBR and Carlo Rossi out of a smuggled in Nalgene bottle - not because you can't afford any better, just because it's the cool thing to do.

SUZY STUMP: FOR THOSE ABOUT TO REVEL, WE SALUTE YOU >>>

What do you get when you cross an opera with a circus?  Puget Sound Revels' colorful, zany staged production and a great way for all ages to celebrate Christmas past and present. 

The Christmas Revels - 60 to 90 adults and children strong - will explore, um, you figure it out (from their Web site):

"This year's Christmas Revels in Tacoma plays with the enduring character of the fool. Culture to culture, community to community into the distant past, the Fool has played a part in people's understanding of the deep nature of things. This year three traveling fools from "the mysterious east" arrive in a European village - late medieval/early Renaissance. The mysterious strangers bring with them music, foolery and fable. Cosmic excitement ensues as they become unlikely guardians of the Sun, Moon and Stars. Their Moorish and Sephardic songs and stories reflect the rich cultural influences of the Ottoman Empire in the early years of Europe's blossoming Renaissance."

It sells out quick. Call now. Operators are standing by.

[Rialto Theater, Saturday, Dec. 12 2 and 7:30 p.m.; Sunday, Dec. 13 1 and 5:30 p.m.; Tuesday, Dec. 15 and Wednesday, Dec. 16 7:30 p.m., $11-$26.50, 310 S. Ninth St., Tacoma, 253.591.5894]

MICHAEL SWAN: FRIDAY, OCT. 30 >>>

1. Arsenic and Old Lace - Joseph Kesselring's dark comedy about crazy aunts and poison starring Cary Grant - screens at 7:30 p.m. inside the Theatre on the Square.

2. Walk behind the scenes in an old ballet studio and see what kind of chills, thrills, and arabesques lurk as Tacoma City Ballet dancers are joined by the Bare Foot Collective - and maybe a couple of ghouls and goblins - in an interactive experience titled The Haunted Theatre: Backstage Tour and Eerie Dances at 5:30 and 7 p.m. at The Merlino Art Center.

3. Bring your kindergarten through sixth-grade kids out for Metro Parks Tacoma's Boo Bash, a safe night of trick-or-treating, from 6-8 p.m. at the South End Neighborhood Resource Center.

4. Vinum Coffee and Wine Lounge in downtown Tacoma throws a Halloween Party with games, prizes, costume contest and Brotherhood Of The Black Squirrel at 8 p.m.
 
5. Many Halloween parties in the clubs start tonight.

CONCERTS: On sale today

LINK: Live music and DJs in the South Sound

LINK: Local movie starting times

LINK: South Sound Restaurant Guide

MICHAEL SWAN: SUNDAY, OCT. 25, 2009 >>>

1. Matt Jaislles's movie Drug Cult - screening at 7 p.m. inside The Brotherhood Lounge in Olympia - has it all: lobotomies, drug fiends, sexy ladies, ruthless cops, a pregnant prostitute and dead bodies.

2. Tacoma poet Tammy Robacker will read and sign her first book of poetry, The Vicissitudes, during a celebration at bellaballs art studio from 2-4 p.m., hosted by Urban Grace Poet Laureate of Tacoma Antonio Edwards, Jr.
 
3. The Tacoma Youth Symphony Association presents A Night At the Movies Costume Concert at 3 and 6 p.m. in the Rialto Theater. 

4. The Tokens Improv host an Improv Seminar from 6-8 p.m. in the Broadway Center Rehearsal Hall.

5. Jazz guitarist ed Taylor and saxophonist Darren Motamedy perform at 8 p.m. inside Muckleshoot Casino.

LINK: Live music and DJs in the South Sound

LINK: Local movie starting times

LINK: South Sound Restaurant Guide

MICHAEL SWAN: FRIDAY, AUG. 28, 2009 >>>

1. The Washington State Capital Museum will load Alfred Hitchcock's The Birds in ye ol' projector for an outdoor screening on their lawn at 9 p.m.

2. Free Ya Mind's open mic and spoken word event hits Tully's at Ninth and Broadway at 7 p.m.

3. Le Voyeur in Olympia hosts Gendersmash! the trans/queer/allies open mic with music, dance, spoken word, performance art, comedy, drag, improve, theater, sing-alongs, games, rants, circus acts and silly human tricks at 8 p.m.

4. The BGP will lay down some suburban soul with Ernie Halter at 8:30 p.m. on Jazzbones' stage.

5. The Tempest Lounge presents Reggae Fridays featuring Jason Diamond spinning at 9:30 pm. â�" no cover.

LINK: Live music and DJs in the South Sound

LINK: Local movie starting times

LINK: South Sound Restaurant Guide

MICHAEL SWAN: SUNDAY, JUNE 21, 2009 >>>

1. J-Fresh mixes and scratches -80s and old school tunes while industry folks get smashed on happy hour prices tonight at Jazzbones.

2. Punk Rock Baseball takes over Jefferson Park from noon to 6 p.m.

3. Tacoma Little Theatre use their revolving stage as a transition device as their production of The Buddy Holly Story flows from one scene to the next beginning at 2 p.m.

4. A young Brit (Ben Barnes) brings his dashing American love (Jessica Biel) home to meet his parents (Kristin Scott Thomas and Colin Firth) with unsettling results in the flick Easy Virtue on The Grand Cinema's screen at 12:35, 2:30, 4:45, 7 and 9:10 p.m.

5. Rod Cook & Toast play a free show at The Spar in Old Town Tacoma at 7 p.m.

LINK: Live music and DJs in the South Sound

LINK: Local movie starting times

LINK: South Sound Restaurant Guide

LINK: Wine and beer events

RON SWARNER: THE NIGHT WAS THE BEE'S KNEES >>>

In lean economic times, treating yourself to a glamorous night out can be hard to justify: Couldn't you have just as much fun drinking PBR at home? The answer is no, but it might mitigate some of the guilt if you knew the money went to a good cause. That's where last night's Star Chefs comes in. The $150-and-up tickets to Broadway Center for the Performing Arts - 1920s-themed "speakeasy" party benefited the Center's performing arts education program.

After dining on small plates prepared by Brix 25, Maxwell's Speakeasy, and A Grand Affaire Catering and nabbing impressive auction items in the Pantages lobby, patrons carried their drinks outside to the stage door where a password on their auction tags allowed passage into a magnificent 1920s nightclub - white tablecloths, low lighting, flappers, red hot jazz, and steak and lobster from El Gaucho.

Kevin Joyce, co-founder of Teatro ZinZanni in Seattle, hosted the night, controlling the flow of the silent and live auction and introducing his acrobats and trapeze artists who performed amazing feats about the stage.

David Fischer, Benjii Bittle and the brain trust behind the Broadway Center did an amazing job.

Kevin Joyce emceed the night.

Teatro Zinzanni's Caribe girls posed as flappers early in the evening.

Bourbon shrimp shooters prepared by chef Colin Dudley of A Grand Affaire Catering.

Broadway Center Deputy Executive Director Benjii Bittle policed the benefit.

Shredded duck confit with spicy grilled prawns by chef Matt Colony of Maxwell's Speakeasy +Lounge.

Marinated chicken and wild mushroom lettuce wraps with Rogue River blue cheese and romaine maki rolls crafted by chef Bryce Lamb of Brix 25.

El Gaucho bartender Silvia Tapia kept the wine glasses full.

Kate Shanaman kept me out of trouble. OK, she didn't.

Um. ...

Protesters picketed outside the Pantages Theater.

The Pantages stage was transformed into a 1920 speakeasy.

El Gaucho chef Kevin Daft prepared Chateaubriand with lobster and béarnaise sauce, mashed potatoes and asparagus as the main entrée.

Cory Tabuni performed feats of physical strength and balance.

The Caribe girls tossed the flapper outfits and took to the air.

MICHAEL SWAN: SATURDAY, MAY 2, 2009 >>>

1. Point Defiance, who will have a new album out in June, will headline Hell's Kitchen's seven-year anniversary bash tonight at 9 p.m.

2. From Pulitzer Prize Winner August Wilson comes this 8 p.m. staged reading of Gem of the Ocean, the masterful first installment of the epic 10 play chronicles August Wilson's Cycle at the Washington State History Museum.

3. Tacoma Musical Playhouse stages The Producers tonight at 8 p.m.

4. Having just released a debut full-length, Petits Fours, Violet Clark and Frank Black, together Grand Duchy, will be (believe it or not) making a stop at Jazzbones in Tacoma tonight.

5. Portland's one-man, beat-based, performance-art inspired Boy Eats Drum Machine will inject the New Frontier Lounge in Tacoma tonight with enough electro charm to send most into a robot like, rhythmic convulsion.

LINK: Live music and DJs in the South Sound

Barn burner: From left, Eric Kunze (The Man), Austin J. Zambito-Valente (Poor Baby), Andrea Ross (Swallow) and Nadine Jacobson (Brat) star in Andrew Lloyd Webber's  Whistle Down the Wind. Photo by Joan Marcus.

The Weekly Volcano caught of the U.S. premiere of Andrew Lloyd Webber's "Whistle Down The Wind" last night at the 5th Avenue Theatre. The show is an uplifting musical about young girl, Swallow, who finds a mysterious stranger and hides him from her fellow Louisiana townspeople, circa 1959, who are determined to find the escaped felon, or The Man as he's billed.

It’s you typical girl looks for a savior, girl finds the savior, girl ends up as the savior.

The voices are exceptional, especially Eric Kunze (felon) and Andrea Ross (Swallow).

Besides a drawn-out final scene with Swallow and the felon, and muddled voices from a couple of the 15 local children in the production, we found “Whistle Down The Wind” a worthy, family-oriented night of theater. â€" Suzy Stump