WHAT WE HAVE FOUND TODAY >>>

Actress Heather Thomas is 53.

Science figures out the sexiest dance moves, with science!

Crosscut Reports: GOP tide could swamp the state's D.C. races, and Olympia too.

According to a new NBC-Wall Street Journal poll, 65 percent of Americans feel that the country is in a state of decline, and only 26 percent think the economy will improve in the next year. The majority of voters think that Obama has "not brought needed change" but are also "as unenthusiastic about Republican incumbents." In other words: meh.

Mark David Chapman denied parole.

Rodney King marries a juror from his 1991 trial.

COFFEE COMING BACK TO SIXTH AND NORTH STATE >>>

Back in the early '90s, Café WA was a favorite spot for Tacoma's music scenesters. I interviewed bands inside the coffeehouse, sipping mochas (thankfully kicked that habit) and nibbling on tasty sandwiches.

Like the grunge bands, Café WA disappeared, eventually becoming Rector's Antiques & Wardrobe at the 2201 Sixth Ave. address.

Rector's recently closed, too.

Then the hammering began.

Peaking our heads inside we learned that Bluebeard Coffee Roasters would be taking over the spot sometime in October if the permit process runs smoothly, which it usually doesn't if roasting is involved.

Stay tuned for more details.

THURSDAY, SEPT. 9, 2010 >>>

1. The Mad Hat Tea Company hosts An Arrogance of Continuity, an evening of art that reflects on how fragile and delicate the world around us actually is - from 7-10 p.m.

2. Blackbird Pie performs at 10:30 a.m. at the Tacoma Farmers Market in downtown Tacoma.

3. Fulcrum Gallery closes out Mathew M Johnson's Impersonal Portraits charcoal and watercolor show with a hosted chat by Johnson, music by Pete Magneson, poetry by Denise Jolly and more beginning at 6 p.m.

4. The Spittin' Cobras, Witchburn, Plaster and All Bets On Death rock Hell's Kitchen at 8 p.m.

5. Bingo at BJ's in Fife is usually for old folks. There isn't any appeal for younger audiences, except hoping to score some quick cash for those new bitchin' car speakers. BJ's wants to change this. Tonight at 11 p.m. they'll instigate Cosmic Bingo. Picture dance music from a bumpin' DJ, neon lights and fast-paced, low-risk gambling. Your grandma probably could't keep up with this bingo - unless she's cool and not prone to seizures.

LINK: More arts and entertainment events in the South Sound

FRIDAY, SEPT. 10, 2010 >>>

Just like Puyallup as a town has grown exponentially from its small, humble beginnings - from field plowing, porch talking and cow milking to cheap beer, high school football and dusty trucks right into full-size SUVS, flat-screen televisions and suburban sprawl - the Puyallup Fair has grown up beside it. What started as a three-day "Valley Fair" in a vacant lot has exploded into a monster spectacle - occupying 169 acres and 17 days, regularly drawing crowds of 1.1 million per year and generally shocking the senses with a staggering array of ShamWows, sit-down foot massage machines, big ass cows, hot tub demonstrations, Funtastic carnie people, Krusty Pups, onion burgers, giant stuffed panda bears, hypnotist shows, guys with Janet Jackson headsets trying to sell stuff, live concerts, elephant ears, and "fun for the whole family." The Puyallup Fair opens today at 10 a.m. Read our Hipster's Guide to the Puyallup Fair here.

2. Justen Ahren, director of the Martha's Vineyard Writers Residency, will be the Distinguished Writer Series' featured poet at 7 p.m. inside King's Books. An open poetry mic will follow Ahren's performance.

3. Sleuth is a mystery. Kind of. Maybe. Which is to say, it might come down to a death that could have happened, depending upon whose account you believe. Including your own. Tacoma Little Theatre stages Sleuth at 7:30 p.m. Read our review of the show here.

4. George Winston looks like a perfect, well-proportioned pianist. Not too big, and not too small, George Winston is the type of pianist everyone can embrace. He's an inviting pianist. And a masterful pianist. Hell, he invented his own goddamn playing style, folk piano. Wait! What did you think we were talking about? Winston will perform at 8 p.m. inside the Rialto Theater, and if you're lucky he'll bust out one of his interpretations of Frank Zappa. That's no pianist joke, either.

5. Chalet Bowl hosts Rock ‘n Glow bowling featuring black lights, bumpin' music and sharks with freakin' lasers on their heads beginning at 10 p.m.

Oh, and there's a Back To School party at the Speakeasy Arts Cooperative tonight, too.

LINK: New movies open today

LINK: Concerts go on sale today

THE WEEKLY VOLCANO DIGS LIVE MUSIC >>>

Capitol Theater Olympia - Downtown. Nomeansno, Tyvek, The Dirty Birds. All Ages. 8 pm. $8-$10.

• Olympia's The Dirty Birds are consistently awesome, a musical staple for the thousands of rock-hungry partygoers who need a tight set to rattle their bones and cure their jones. The band's garage punk/surf-a-billy roots branch into states of sophistication and skank with the well-placed hum and hoot of a fantastic saxophonist. Going to a Dirty Birds show inevitably leaves you up late with more beer in your belly than planned, and a reverb of gritty vocals and tasty licks pulsing through your brain. This Friday's show is extra wicked; not only do you get The Dirty Birds, but Tyvek and NoMeansNo will be onstage, connecting synapses with quirky spastic punk, leaving listeners in a heightened state of musical being. - Nikki Talotta

Le Voyeur Olympia - Downtown. Patriot Day Eve's party with Party Killer (pdx), Last Prick Standing (pdx), Black Floyd (oly). 21+. 9 pm. NC.

Mandolin Cafe Tacoma - Central. Jam On My Muffin. All Ages. 6 pm. NC.

Northern Olympia - Downtown. The Kora Band. All Ages. 8 pm.

Puyallup Fair Grandstand Puyallup. Bret Michaels. All Ages. 9 pm. $30.

• You didn't think Bret Michaels was going to let a little brain hemorrhage stop him from touring, did you? Hell no, bro! Those brain hemorrhages happened way back in April, dude! There's no way the Bret Michaels America has come to know and love would miss all the hot MILF action in the Krusty Pup line at the Puyallup Fair. Every rose may have its thorn, but Bret Freakin' Michaels doesn't mess around when it comes to spreading his rockstar seed. Those dreamy eyes are serious, and the man's loins will never be tamed, not by diabetes, by hemorrhage or by any sign of embarrassment stemming from a wholly forgettable career. This event will function much like a reunion for Puyallup High School's classes of '87 - '89. Danny Thurston and Billy Joe Hobert will totally get laid somehow. – Weekly Volcano
  

Red Wind Casino Yelm. Sonic Funk Orchestra. 21+. 8:30 pm. NC.

Rialto Theater Tacoma - Downtown. George Winston. All Ages. 8 pm. $30 advance, $35 day of show.

SideBar Bistro Tacoma - Downtown. Saxophonist Michael Hershman. All Ages. 6-9 pm. NC.

Hell's Kitchen Tacoma - Downtown. Church Of Hate, Broken Oars, Infernal Legion, Sok & The Faggots, Enemy Action. 21+. 8 pm. NC.

Uncle Sam's American Bar & Grill Spanaway. Metal Effen Friday featuring loud and local bands. 21+. 8 pm.

LINK: More live music in the South Sound

SOUTH SOUND ARTS COVERAGE IN THIS WEEK'S VOLCANO >>>

Fall Arts Guide: It's a new twist on an old favorite with dinner and post drink suggestions for 21 and a half events by Weekly Volcano staff

New School In Town: Ballet Arts Tacoma teaches skills and ballet culture in downtown Tacoma by Kristin Kendle

Chastity Returns: Mineral's provocative chastity belt show part two by Alec Clayton

LINK: Arts and entertainment events in the South Sound

HOAX OR NOT A HOAX? >>>

I should start by talking about what people have been saying about Joaquin Phoenix ever since he grew that terrible beard and vowed to quit the acting game. People smelled a hoax - a giant put-on, all for the sake of a "documentary" that Phoenix's brother-in-law, Casey Affleck, was shooting - and they may have been right to do so. Having seen the film, I still cannot say whether or not it's a hoax.

However, regardless of Phoenix's motives, the things that he does to himself and his career over the course of I'm Still Here are vile, self-destructive and very real. If he felt it necessary to alienate himself from stardom in an attempt to lend realism to a mockumentary, then he succeeded in spades. That most people will forever believe he was faking it is, I guess, the last joke.

Read my full review of the film here.

THE LOWDOWN ON WHAT'S UP THIS WEEKEND >>>

WEATHER REPORT

Friday: Mostly cloudy, hi 65, lo 52

Saturday: Partly cloudy, hi 67, lo 50

Sunday: Chance of rain 30 percent, hi 65, lo 52

>>> FRIDAY, SEPT. 10: TACOMA NATIVE PART II

Tonight's second installment of Tacoma Native offers an amalgamation of visual art, music and performance featuring new work by visual artists Jeremy Gregory, Kris Crews, Zachary Marvick. Galen Turner and Sean Alexander at Fulcrum Gallery. Also on the bill are video creations by Crews and Bridgett Nicol and local northwest musicians Makeup Monsters, Going Shopping and Ethereal Weeping.

• Fulcrum Gallery, 8 p.m., $5, 1308 MLK Way, Tacoma, 253.250.0520

>>> SATURDAY, SEPT. 11: CAPTAIN PHIL HARRIS MEMORIAL CORN MAZE OPENING

This year's Rutledge Corn Maze pays tribute to the life of Captain Phil Harris, the former skipper of the crab boat Cornelia Marie and star of the Discovery Channel's reality TV series Deadliest Catch. Harris passed away in February after a massive heart attack. Depending on your ability to not get lost, the maze will take you about one-and-a-half hours to three hours to complete. But don't be scared, no crabs are there to scare you, and there are checkpoints along the way to guide you. There are concessions and produce stands available in case being near all that corn gets your appetite up. So bring the one you are stalking - get it, stalk - and enjoy a day in the country, and the memory of one brave man.

• Rutledge Farms, 10 a.m. to dusk Sunday-Thursday, 10 a.m. to midnight Friday-Saturday, $5-$10, 225 93rd Ave. S.E., take exit 99 off south Interstate 5 and go east about 1.5 miles, $7 adults, $5 children, $20 for a family of four, 360.357.3700

>>> SATURDAY, SEPT. 11: STRUT FOR A MUTT FASHION SHOW

The London Couture vintage clothing store, which (in case you didn't realize) is in Puyallup, will present a fashion show Saturday night aimed at raising money, "puppy food" and "puppy products" for local animal shelters. Geared at "mothers and daughters," according to promotions, the event is free and starts at 7 p.m. at London Couture in Puyallup. It's also being billed as a good opportunity for models, makeup artists and photographers to get together and network. A donation of puppy food or other "puppy products" is strongly suggested. Whoa. Geared for mothers and daughters? Bret Michaels is totally going to stay in town for this event and cruise for tail.

• London Couture, 7 p.m., free, 122nd Ave. E., Puyallup, londoncouture@hotmail.com]

>>> SATURDAY, SEPT 11: REDNECK PARKING LOT PARTY PART III

Big Whisky's final Redneck Parking Lot Party of the summer goes down Saturday night in the parking lot behind the downtown Tacoma club's building. Folks will show up to suck up live country music, dance on the outdoor dance floor, drink cold beer, eat barbecue and ride "Bubba the Mechanical Bull." That's redneck success, and exactly why this Saturday the Big Whisky is holding the parking lot featuring Robbie Walden & The Gunslingers, Aces Up and others. Bonus: A portion of the admission charge will be donated to Operation Ward 57 - a non-profit that supports America's Wounded Warriors.

• Big Whisky Saloon, 6 p.m. to 2 a.m., free cover to all military and emergency-service personnel before 8 p.m., $10 after, 100 S. Ninth St., Tacoma, 253.272.0777

>>> WHERE OUR STAFF IS GOING

MATT DRISCOLL Editor and Erotic Mime
The thing is, see, I'm off all next week. I know that's not what anyone around Weekly Volcano World Headquarters wants to be reminded of, as it'll be someone else's job to insert f-bombs into next weeks editorial copy, and someone else's responsibility to chain smoke cigarettes out back, but reality is what it is. What will I do this weekend? Who knows ... This weekend is only the start. The possibilities are endless.

Seriously, though, I don't really have plans. ... 

STEPH DEROSA Columnist
Friday evening I will join Bandito Betty and Kris Blondin for a wine-themed 3 Drink Minimum at Pour at Four. Afterward I will shun all Bret Michaels haters by batting my eyelashes in the general direction of him at the Puyallup Fair. That's right, jealous men, someone with blonde hair extensions, a perma-bandana, and the ability to spread syphilis in an airborne manner will be getting more action than you will this weekend.

KRIS BLONDIN Food/Wine Writer
While nursing a sucky head cold, I hope to meet with DeRosa and
Bandito Betty before they go on tour with Bret Michaels Friday night.
Saturday I plan to attend the company picnic from my day job (they're
will probably be lots of beer and wine there, wink wink), and Sunday,
sweet Sunday, nothing. But still, most likely, I will be nursing my
sucky cold.

JENNIFER JOHNSON: Lifestyle/Leisure Writer
Dancing with girlfriends at Surreal's Ladies Night Friday. Saturday by day: Hitting the streets to promote South Downtown's Block Party on Sept. 18. Saturday by night: Attending the wrap party for local film A Perfect Life starring Joe Rosati at the Hub event space. At some point I'll go shopping for a Bollywood-esque dress for Prom at Sanford & Son (it's less than two weeks away, yippee!).

JOE IZENMAN Music/Theater Critic
Saturday. Tacoma Dome. Wedding expo. If I live to see Sunday, recovery will consist of pizza, beer, popcorn, and immersion in the glory that is the National Football League. Until then ... courage.

REV. ADAM MCKINNEY Features Writer
Friday, I head down to Olympia for a show at the ABC House. It'll be the first time I've been to Olympia in a couple years, and I expect big things from the ABC House. That place has been around for 30 years! Crazy. Saturday, it's all about the Humble Cub CD release show at the Peabody Waldorf. This is decidedly less likely to broken up by the cops than that Japanther show.

CHRISTIAN CARVAJAL: Theater Critic
I'm seeing The Dixie Swim Club at OLT, then participating in the Table for Olympia.  This is where, ordinarily, I'd make some wisecrack, but a community picnic on the National Day of Resemblance deserves better.  I hope to see you there.

ALEC CLAYTON: Visual Arts Critic
I'm catching Dixie Swim Club at Olympia Little Theatre this weekend.

LINK: More arts and entertainment events in the South Sound

HOPS WITH HERREN >>>

"Brought in 50 cases last week, had maybe six or seven left," says Donna Herren waving her hands in the air.

What has her so excited, you ask?

Produce and ceramic pots?

Nope.

Beer.

Specifically, the Men's Room Original Red that Kris Blondin reported on last week. The Specialty 22-ounce bottled beers have arrived at the Boys' Sixth Avenue location, and "are FLYING out the door" says Herren, Tacoma Boys' wine, beer and cheese manager. 

In fact, "true beer geeks" as she fondly refers to those that appreciate finely crafted liquid libations, will be as thrilled with other new beer arrivals. "STOOPID DELICIOUS" is how Herren describes the seven tasty beers via email.

Hopworks Urban Brewery, Portland's first eco-brewpub, has two specifically awesome beers: Ace of Spades, an Imperial India Pale Ale the brewery refers as a hop goblin, and the summer seasonal Rise Up Red made with locally grown Cascade and Centennial hops that's an American style amber/red ale - both 2009 Great American Beer Festival gold winners. The two beers also incorporate organic ingredients and sustainable practices into their brewing.

Herren is also pleased with her acquisition of 22-ounce bottled microbrews from California-based Russian River Brewing, New York's Southern Tier Brewing and a line of Belgian-inspired beers called The Lost Abbey produced by Port Brewing.

Bottling 22s is a new endeavor for Ashland, Oregon's Caldera Brewery with the first batch sealed Feb. 5this year. It's a good time to try one out.

An entire section of the Sixth Avenue Tacoma Boys store is dedicated to microbrews, imports, and hard-to-find adult beverages such as sake, sparkling red wines and dessert wines you won't find at Safeway.

Tacoma Boys

5602 Sixth Ave., Tacoma
253.756.0902

BRING ON THE WEEKEND >>>

As was noted earlier in the cult-Spew-favorite "Weekend Hustle," not only is the weekend upon us, but I'll be taking all next week off.  Vacation time is rare for me, so I'm planning on going all out. Early prognosticators are calling for heavy doses of sweat pants at the Driscoll household over the next week.  Also, the afternoon nap's stock appears to be rising. 

So, let's jump into one of my last Volcano obligations before heading off for a full week of vacation-y fun. It's The Prefunk, a weekend primer for you and your liver - with an added picture of an alcoholic household pet thrown in for good measure.

THE LAST FIVE YEARS

SEPT. 11 @ The Mecca in Tacoma

If you follow the arts in Tacoma, chances are you're familiar with the upstart theater company Gold From Straw. Gold From Straw's production of Doubt earlier this year won rave reviews, and the hype is only building for the company's future plans, which include the upcoming Almost, Maine - a play featured in the Volcano's recently released Fall Arts Guide spectacular. Main man (read: Artistic Director) Aaron Schmookler has been able to build a buzz, and for good reason: Gold From Straw Theatre Company has already shown the desire and drive to shake up and invigorate Tacoma's theater scene.

Gold From Straw's mission statement reads like something like the liberal arts version of Vince Lombardi might have said (OK, so that's an exaggeration, but still...)

Gold From Straw Theatre Company exists to produce innovative and exciting works of theater that celebrate and nourish the human spirit.  With a commitment to the highest artistic standards, we stage an eclectic array of new works and classics that are raw, substantial and sophisticated while simultaneously sincere, and optimistic.  Gold From Straw is a gathering place for artists, audiences, students, teachers.  As our name suggests, we recognize and embrace an element of alchemy in theatre - where so many share a single focus, transformation on some level is inevitable.  Our work is meant not only to interest and entertain, but also to remind us of what we share.  As we practice it, theatre creates environments where we all can celebrate our common humanity.

Gold From Straw:  Surprise.  Delight.  Inspire.

This Saturday at 8 p.m. at the Mecca you'll have another chance to catch The Last Five Years (a play that also ran last Saturday) - being put on in an effort to raise funds for future Gold From Straw endeavors. Erik Hill directs the work, which is being billed as "a full production sans lights and sets," with musical direction from Jenifer Rifenbery. Bruce Story and Samantha Camp take starring rolls.

According to official descriptions, The Last Five Years is "a contemporary song-cycle musical that ingeniously chronicles the five year life of a marriage, from meeting to break-up... or from break-up to meeting, depending on how you look at it. Written by Jason Robert Brown, The Last Five Years is an intensely personal look at the relationship between a writer and an actress told from both points of view."

PREFUNK: You could do any number of things to get yourself primed for Saturday night's production of The Last Five Years. Honestly, I don't feel right leading you in one particular direction or another. What I will point out is how much things have changed over the years, and how priming you for a production at the Mecca would have been really easy (and kind of gross) not too long ago.