NO ENGLISH REQUIRED >>>

The first thing I notice when walking into the nightclub at El Tenampa Mexican Restaurant is that everyone speaks Spanish. Everyone. The guy checking ID's at the door, the lady taking my entrance fee, the bartender, the band. Each time I talk to someone, I'm forced to utter one of the most embarrassing pronunciations of "no habla español," Tacoma has ever heard.

Some would find the lack of English in the club intimidating. For my money, though, it just adds to the fact that El Tenampa is one of the coolest nightclubs in town.

To read the full story, click here.

[El Tenampa Mexican Restaurant, Open until 2 a.m. on weekends, $20 cover for men, 3121 S. 38th St., Tacoma, 253.474.3405]

WEDNESDAY, MARCH 16, 2011 >>>

1. Quite honestly, when the Red Elvises play the Swiss in Tacoma - a long running tradition - the results are usually epic. Tonight should be no different. Or if that's not your musical cup of tea, click here for the Volcano's comprehensive live local music listings.

2. Wednesdays are synonymous with a few things, including the oft-used, always sure to inspire a middle school giggle, "Hump Day." But Chalet Bowl in the Proctor District has a different adjective they like to use - wacky - as in the weekly Wacky Wednesday. It's all you can bowl for two whole hours - 9-11 p.m.-and it'll only cost you $5.50 per person.

3. Like a man in a black hat? Try Robbie Walden & the Gunslingers at Jazzbones tonight.

4. In 2006 the Greater Tacoma Community Foundation helped create the Youth Against Violence Initiative - a local group partnering community leaders, activists, professionals and (most importantly) area youths in an effort to reduce youth violence and build an "engaged community that fosters a sense of hope and optimism among our community and young people," according to the Greater Tacoma Community Foundation website. Today, members of the Youth Against Violence Initiative will discuss their efforts with the Tacoma City Club.

5. Tax time is soon approaching. And it can be scary. Today in Puyallup, ease your fears with the Tax Information & Assistance class at the Puyallup Public Library.

THE LOWDOWN ON WHAT'S UP THIS WEEKEND >>>

WEATHER REPORT

Friday: Cloudy, hi 51, lo 41

Saturday: Rain, hi 49, lo 42

Sunday: Rather cloudy, rain possible, hi 49, lo 44

>>> MARCH 11 - 12: Jordan Family Circus

The circus is a dying art - and the circus-lifer is a dying breed. Bearded ladies just don't go as far as they once did. Sure, someday there may be an iPhone app replicating the experience only achieved by rings of fire, balancing acts, shitty peanuts and captive wild animals. But what fun will that be? This weekend the Jordan Family Circus sets up its tents at the Puyallup Fairgrounds, more than ready to stick their entire head in a wild beast's mouth for nothing more than your applause ... and a small entrance fee. See it while you still can.

• Puyallup Fairgrounds - Paulhamus Arena, $16 Adult, $12 Children 3-12, 110 Ninth Ave. SW, Tacoma, thejordanworldcircus.com]

>>> SATURDAY, MARCH 12: The Great Leprechaun Hunt

The Tacoma Mob Riders are at it again -- planning another booze fueled bicycle cruise for Tacoma's dedicated peddlers this weekend. Starting off at everyone's favorite beer and hot dog destination, The Red Hot (because nothing says, "Let's go excercise!" like a stomach full of hot dogs and beer), The Great Leprechaun Hunt Bicylce Booze Cruz will kick off at 7 p.m. and offer riders a chance to mingle, drink, ride and repeat -- with this time of year's obligatory Irish green thrown in for good measure.

• Starts at The Red Hot, 7 p.m., free, 2914 Sixth Ave.., Tacoma, 253.779.0229

>>> SUNDAY, MARCH 13: Jim Lynch & Stephanie Kallos

Weekly Volcano readers recently named Jim Lynch "Best Writer" in our 2011 Best of Olympia issue. Taking nothing away from those who cast votes, they were really just following the overall trend. Jim Lynch is getting props from high and low, and they're all well deserved. His novels, 2006's The Highest Tide, and the more recent (and most awesome) Border Songs have both been gushed over by book critic types from across the land. Sunday, Lynch and fellow author Stephanie Kallos, who spent 20 years in the theater business before turning her attention to writing, will be at the Tacoma Art Museum to talk about how the Northwest has inspirted their work -- part of the Literacy Month Author Series.

• Tacoma Art Museum, 2 p.m., $10, 1701 Pacific Ave., Tacoma, 253.272.4258.

>>> WHERE OUR STAFF IS GOING

NIKKI TALOTTA Features Writer
Well, I'm back at work this weekend, so I'm sure I'll be hearing about all the great shows I'm missing. But no bother, I'll be happy shaking it behind the bar, where all kinds of fun things happen. (Check out my Spew Blog, "Behind Bars" for more on that.) Anyway, what's really got me shaking is the nerve-racking wait time to see if an offer we put on a new house goes through! Geez - big things for Volcano staff lately, engagements, babies, new houses - there must be something in the paycheck ink.

MATT DRISCOLL Editor
For the first weekend in as long as I can remember we don't have a toddler birthday party to attend this weekend, so I'll probably ... Wait. Crap. My wife just texted. Guess we got invited to a toddler birthday party. So there you go ...

BRETT CHIHON Meat Market Correspondent/Features Writer
I have my sights set on the Matador tequila bar for Friday night, which means I've penciled in a headache for Saturday morning.

CHRISTIAN CARVAJAL: Theater Critic
Between rounds of wedding plans, I'll be reviewing Love, Sex, and the IRS at OLT and The Floating World at PLU. Best of all, I get to watch hostile E.T.s kick the crap out of my home town in Battle: Los Angeles. Go, Team Alien!

ALEC CLAYTON: Visual Arts Critic
More theater shit. Going to see Love, Sex and the IRS at Olympia Little Theatre. And, if you want to fudge on the definition of weekend, I'm going to see the high school art exhibit at South Puget Sound Community College to review it for this fine rag (actually going this afternoon).

JOANN VARNELL Theater Critic
This weekend (hopefully), I will be crafty and make curtains for my son's room in anticipation of transitioning him to spend nights in there. Other than that, I got nothin'.

STEVE DUNKELBERGER Nightlife Correspondent
I'm headed to the Tacoma Opera then Toxic 253 Roller Derby, Lenten stuff and maybe start planting my pea patch.

JOE IZENMAN Theater and Music Writer
With the missus away for her hometown bridal shower, it's 100% MAXIMUM PARTY TIME at Casa Izenman. Featuring such exciting party activities as playing Settlers of Catan, DnD character creation, maybe a chess game or two, and a bike ride to the final monthly off-season Proctor Farmer's Market. NEWS FLASH: I am a huge nerd.

REV. ADAM MCKINNEY Features Writer
In between going to Santee's show on Friday and all of the other totally fun things I'm doing this weekend, I will be scrambling to figure out last-minute accommodations for my trip down to SXSW. If there are any non-serial-killers out there reading this, I will gladly stay at your house for the days of the 14th-16th or the 20th-22nd.

JENNIFER JOHNSON Food and Lifestyles Writer
The DoDo Show at Mad Hat Tea Friday evening. Volunteering at the Empowerment Center Saturday morning. Then attending the vocal masterworks concert at Tacoma Community College Saturday night. Sunday church service followed by potluck dinner with friends.

RON SWARNER Publisher
Friday night I'm hitting MOVE! #18, followed by embarrassing ass shaking during Rare Groove night at The Tempest. Sunday afternoon I'll clean up for the Tacoma Opera. The remaining time gaps will be filled with thick and thin crust research for our Tournament of Pizza, which begins March 17.

LINK: More arts and entertainment events in the South Sound

SO MUCH MATERIAL, SO LITTLE TIME >>>

There's a lot of stuff out there in the world of art that I will never be able to cover in my column.  The following are some suggestions of a few things in the South Sound you might want to take a look at.

Local students are being highlighted in the latest show at the Kenneth J. Minnaert Center for the Arts Gallery at South Puget Sound Community College. The exhibition featuring local high school artists begins today and runs through March 23 with a special closing reception March 23 from 6-8 p.m. The gallery will feature extended hours for the exhibit. The exhibit will be open Monday through Friday from noon to 5 p.m. As a cool added feature, the show is part of a state art competition, and if you go you can vote for your favorite pieces. Your vote just might be the one to start some future art star on the road to fame.

Also in Olympia, M.W.Lindenmeyer will be showing Olympia cityscapes in pastel and watercolor at the Lieutenant Governor's Office, Room 220 in the Legislative Building on the Capitol Campus. The show opened March 7 and continues through May 5. Lindenmeyer has been painting West Coast cityscapes for more than 30 years in a variety of media. In 2004 he began visiting Olympia looking for a fresh inspiration, and the works in this show have been done since then. He e-mailed me a couple of images from the show. They're kind of fun and playful. I enjoyed them a lot.

In Tacoma, photographer Jim Oliver is having a show at The Tahoma Center Gallery called Your Table is Waiting. I previewed photos from the show and was very impressed with their formal simplicity and elegance. There will be a reception March 17 from 5-7:30 p.m. Gallery hours are 8 a.m. to 5 p.m. Monday, Wednesday and Friday and 8 a.m. to 8 p.m. Tuesday and Thursday. The gallery is located on the 2nd floor of the old St Leo's School at 1323 S. Yakima Ave., Tacoma.

Also in Tacoma, Sandpiper Gallery is having a show called Round in Circles with painter J. Neils Harvey and bead sculptor Indian Owen. Curator Lynn Di Nino said of Harvey, "Inspired by the pointillist paintings of Georges Seurat and a fascination with mosaics, (Harvey) has pioneered a unique style. Harvey layers ‘bubbles' of bold colors creating a spectacular optical effect. Using acrylic paint as her preferred medium, (she) uses a self-taught technique to juxtapose thousands of precisely placed colors."

The show runs through March 26. Sandpiper Gallery is at 2221 N 30^th St, Old Town Tacoma. They're open every day except Sunday from noon to 5 p.m. or by appointment. Call 253.627.6667.

Finally, there's the Artisan Tile NorthWest show at Handforth Gallery in the downtown Tacoma Public Library featuring tiles by Claudia Riedener, Debra Bacianga, John McCuistion, Steve Moon, Allison Moore, and many more tile artists. The show runs through April 12. There will be an opening reception March 12 from 1-3 p.m.

GRAB A SANDWICH AND MOVE INTO THE MODERN ERA >>>

Continuing my choices for the greatest artists of all time, I move swiftly to the modern era.

At the risk of oversimplifying, all of modern art (or all of modern painting at least) is based on the idea that a painting is an arrangement of shapes and colors on a flat surface and not, as previously thought, a window on the world. That idea pretty much started with Édouard Manet in the mid 19^th century and was further defined by Paul Cézanne, and reached it's zenith with the true giant of modern art who towered over all others - Pablo Picasso.

And let's not forget Henri Matisse.

There were three threads to 20^th century art: Cubism, Dada/Surrealism and abstraction. Picasso mastered and combined all three. With the exception of pure abstraction, meaning no subject matter at all, there was nothing done in 20^th century painting that Picasso didn't do first. I can't emphasize enough what a huge figure he was. Other giants of these various movements were George Braque, Wassily Kandinsky and Marcel Duchamp (if you don't know them, look them up). Everything to come after about 1920 was an outgrowth of either Cubism or the related movements of Dada and Surrealism.

In America, Willem de Kooning and other New York painters synthesized Surrealism and Cubism to form a painting style known as Abstract Expressionism. On a personal note, these were the painters who most influenced me when I was an art student, and I don't think any artists since have done anything quite so exciting. The greatest of these were de Kooning and Jackson Pollock. You know them. Look at their paintings. Look closely. Study the textures and the peekaboo forms that weave in and out of space, the startling contrasts of lyrical and harsh shapes and lines. Take any and every opportunity to see their works in person (they're both in the permanent collection at Seattle Art Museum).

Modern art - first in Europe and later in America - has developed in a pretty linear fashion with a few divergent branches. Next in this line of development in America were Jasper Johns and Robert Rauschenberg, who took the methods and styles of Abstract Expressionism and applied them to a kind of tongue-in-cheek glorification of banal subject matters and blurred the distinctions between painting, sculpture and performance art.  Rauschenberg turned a bed on its end and painted it, covers, pillows and all, and put a stuffed goat and chicken in his assemblages; Johns borrowed a drawing from de Kooning and erased it and called it - what else? - "Erased de Kooning." Their work set the stage for Pop Art, which has in turn influenced pretty much everything that's happened in the world of art since about 1960.

The giants of Pop were Andy Warhol and Roy Lichtenstein. Not quite as great but one of my personal favorites was Tom Wesselman who piques my prurient interest in a humorous way.

Since the advent of Pop Art there has been such an explosion of artistic activity that it is impossible to list the greatest artists without leaving out many who deserve to be on that list. Here are just a few not yet mentioned whom I consider to be among the greatest:

Arshile Gorky, Robert Motherwell, Frances Bacon, Frank Stella, Louise Nevelson, Ellsworth Kelly, Eva Hesse, Richard Serra, Phillip Pearlstein, Anselm Kiefer and Susan Rothenberg.

LINK HUB

LINK: The greatest artists "Part One"

SUNDAY, FEB. 27, 2011 >>>

1. In Olympia, anyone who attends the Olympia Film Society's Oscar Party tonight can lay hands on - and be photographed with - a real Oscar. Hosted by pianist-actor-director-composer Josh Anderson, the party will feature a trivia casting couch, a raffle, prizes for the person who picks the most Oscar winners and even a red carpet in front of the theater.

2. Want an Oscar party in T-Town? Never fear. The Grand has you covered. The Grand Cinema's Oscar Party festivities begin at 4 p.m., Sunday, Feb. 27 - one hour before the televised red carpet coverage. While the spacious Rialto has hosted the event in past years, The Grand has strategically chosen a new venue this year: Broadway Center's Theatre on the Square."

3. Think all-ages Cirque du Soleil, and you won't be far off from the spectacle and magic of Imago Theatre - the company's "ZOOZOO" hits the Pantages Theater this afternoon. USA Today says the company has "an international reputation well deserved." Their current show combines the best bits from two previous shows, FROGZ and Biglittlethings.

4. The always fantastic Jeanlizabeth hosts an open mic every Sunday at the Steilacoom Bar & Grill. Check out the Weekly Volcano's full live local music calendar for Sunday here.

5. If you have yet to venture down to Hell's Kitchen yet for Sunday Sermon, tonight is your chance. DJ Defcon 1 provides the jams. The action starts at 9 p.m.

R.R. ANDERSON IS ON THE OFFENSIVE >>>

I don't get out much. My duty to the Volcano keeps me locked behind the keyboard for very long hours.

Weekly Volcano man about town, publisher, and far-better-multi-tasker-than-me, Ron Swarner, on the other hand, juggles it all with style and grace - fulfilling his duties to this fine rag while still managing to make it out to events around town ...

Like Monday's Shift Happens event at the Tacoma Convention and Trade Center, for example.

While there, Swarner ran into one R.R. Anderson, local gadfly, artist, and creator of the brilliant Tacomic series.

No stranger to the Volcano or ruffling feathers, Anderson shared with Swarner news of a forthcoming artistic endeavor - a guerilla poster project with Tacoma's well-known Beautiful Angle in its proverbial sights.

Stuck behind my keyboard (naturally), I emailed Anderson to get the specifics.

"For too long the dynamic art duo known as 'Beautiful Angle' has dominated the letterpress art poster scene in this city... bi-monthly nocturnal routes to shove ‘ART' down the peoples throats," writes Anderson. "Well, their monopoly will soon be at an end. Using advanced electronic or digital letterpress technology I can produce more beautiful posters more quickly for way cheaper and stuff.  As soon as I figure out how to make wheat-paste (either Googling it or asking my craft-expert wife) - this town will be a two-art-poster town!"

By the sound of it, Tacoma can look for Anderson's posters to debut soon.

Here's a peak at what the first may or may not look like:

WEDNESDAY, JAN. 26, 2011 >>>

1. According to hype, "Marilyn Freeman is an interdisciplinary, process- and time-based artist living in Olympia, Washington. Her work is characterized by themes of identity, tolerance, faith and alienation." Currently, she's a visiting artist at the Evergreen State College. Today, join Freeman as part of the Evergreen Artist Lecture Series from 12:15 - 1:30 p.m. in Lecture Hall 1.

2. Perhaps art isn't the first thing that comes to mind when thinking about South Tacoma Way's Stonegate Pizza, but tonight it should be. From 1-10 p.m. artists like Amanda Watson, Anthony McArthur and Melissa Prior will be in the house to show their wears and generally make nice. The event is free, appetizers and wine will be served, and there's even a raffle.

3. For a classy good time, join Kareem Kandi at Pour at Four wine bar in Tacoma tonight. Here are our complete music listings for the day.

4. Have you been to Kamel Toe Bar and Grill in Parkland yet? Have you gotten any of it on you? Tonight just may be your night - as jam night brings members of Kashmire, Soul Stripper and others to the stage.

5. The fourth Wednesday of the month means it's time again for the CLAW open Swim Public Meeting & Drawing Session tonight at Amocat Café in Tacoma, 7:30 - 9:30 p.m.. This is your chance to peak into Tacoma's most fantastic secret society. Bring your own drawing supplies, and a fez if you have one.

FRIDAY, JAN. 14, 2011 >>>

1. Makeup Monsters will play their last show in quite some time tonight at The New Frontier Lounge tonight. As the Volcano's Jason Baxter so aptly noted in this week's paper, "Makeup Monsters (formerly the duo of Shayne Weeks and Isaac Solverson, now a trio including Jay Clancy) are a band that's frustratingly talented, handsome and widely beloved. They're also remarkably young - something that's been discussed to death here and elsewhere. MM's youthful energy is in keeping with their aural ancestry, which dates back to the distant year of 2001, when vibrant, fresh-faced sensations (the Strokes, et al.) helped re-legitimize FM "alt" radio with contagious, candied rock. But rather than simply regurgitate those millennial tropes, Weeks, Solverson and Clancy make them their own, infusing feel-good jingles with rhythmic restlessness and barbed, sometimes-prickly lyrics. Theirs is not your father's rock music, but it might sound a little like a revisionist take on your older brother's."

2. Bates Technical College always gets in on the Martin Luther King Jr. Day celebration - and this year is no different. Today, the school will sponsor a free screening of Stanley Nelson's documentary, Freedom Riders, from 11:15 a.m. to 12:30 p.m. at the downtown campus.

3. Unschooled in the "neo-cabaret" musical genre? Don't fret - just check out Portland's Vagabond Opera Friday in Olympia. Truly offering music of the world, the six-piece Vagabond Opera reportedly dabbles in sounds spanning the globe - from European cabaret, to Balkan belly dance, to Old World Yiddish theater and beyond. Tonight, the Vagabond Opera takes over the Kenneth J. Minnaeart Center for the Arts in Olympia.

4. What's that rumbling you hear? It's the Advance Auto Parts Monster Jam, bringing demolition to the Tacoma Dome once again - and crushing things throughout the weekend.

5. Comedian Rebecca Corry kicks off a sure-to-be-funny-as-hell weekend stand at the Tacoma Comedy Club tonight. Share the laughs.

LINK: New movies open today

LINK: More arts and entertainment events in the South Sound

SUNDAY, JAN. 2, 2011 >>>

1. Get your Sunday night dance on tonight at Gruv Lounge on Sixth Avenue. DJs Michael Sherman, Chris Savenetti and Bilori will be doing the spinning.

2. Today is your absolute last chance to check out ZooLights. Billed as the region's biggest walk-through light show, ZooLights includes animated light sculptures, live entertainment, snacks, animal encounters, and the Paul Titus Carousel. While enjoying your stroll, be thankful you're not in charge of this holiday light display.

3. Every Sunday morning from 8:30 - 9:30 a.m. Urban Grace Church serves breakfast to Tacoma's homeless and low-income population. Find you how you can get involved at urbangracetacoma.org.

4. Rich Wetzel, his horn, and his well-known Groovin' Higher Orchestra will tear into Stonegate Pizza twice today - at 5 and 9 p.m. Bonus: there's no cover.

5. Tammy Faye & The Thrill Billies will be at O'Callahan's Pub & Grill today at 4 p.m. For those playing at home, O'Callahan's Pub & Grill is in Lakebay, at the corner of 92^nd and Key Peninsula Highway. O'Callahan's Pub & Grill also has some "award winning chowder," according to hype. Sadly, we know very little about Tammy Faye & The Thrill Billies other than that's the most awesome band name we've heard in the last three weeks.