WHAT WE HAVE FOUND TODAY >>>

Lindsay Lohan is 24 today.

>>> SOUTH SOUND SPECIFIC

Olympia residents elected the town's first mayor in 1873 - William Winlock Miller. Before then, a town president was selected annually from among the members of the town board. William Winlock Miller High School opened in 1907 on land donated by Miller's wife on the grounds immediately east of the sunken gardens in the Washington State Capitol Campus. In 1961 the high school split in two forming Olympia High and Tumwater High.

>>> TODAY'S WORD

anarthria (an-'ar-thre-e) noun [New Latin, from Greek anarthros, not articulated]

Loss of the motor ability that enables speech

anarthric - adjective

Usage example: And then Elly May just stood there, gasping and grinning, utterly speechless, giddy as a schoolgirl on meth, very nearly anarthric, quivering and goosebumped all over her oatmealy skin, as a masked man on a ladder peered at her naked body through her second story Puyallup apartment window. "At least someone's interested in seeing me naked," she didn't manage to whisper to her fat husband in the next room who was frothing at the mouth over SportsCenter.

>>> NEWS TO US

The unemployed receive bad news before a holiday ... again.

Soon it will NOT be legal to drink and drive in Russia.

Booze v. Buds? Herbal jazz cigarettes win.

The Morning Spew posts every Monday, Wednesday and Friday morning on this blog.

WHAT WE HAVE FOUND TODAY, JUNE 30, 2010 >>>

Michael Phelps is 25 today.

>>> SOUTH SOUND SPECIFIC

The name Tacoma stems from the Indian name for Mt. Rainier, "Tacobet," meaning Mother of the Waters.

>>> TODAY'S WORD

mummer "me-mer\ noun [MF momeur, fr. momer to go masked] (1502)

1) A performer in a pantomime; broadly: actor

Usage example: And then companies in China hired white mummers all dressed like the really cute Jonas Brothers brought into their business lunches to portray business partners or clients, which never failed to spur a fresh bout of deeply sinister chuckling.

>>> STORY PICK OF THE MORNING

In one of the more adorable examples of stories about a sadly moronic teen lug-nut male that make you say, Jesus with a latex thong, even with all my little problems including but not limited to that strange rash and the sock-sniffing fetish thing and the goddamn government's unpatriotic position, at least my life hasn't come to this, Colton Harris-Moore - 19-year-old Camano Island burglar known as "The Barefoot Bandit" - was caught on surveillance video at a northeast Nebraska airport earlier this month, so an arrest warrant has been issued.

"Dude, my mom use to attach tiny bells on my shoes with like The Weeping Helix knot, you know, impossible to take off, so she could hear my coming up from the basement, and I was all, "I'm 12 Mom," and she was all, "So," so I threw my shoes at her head all Middle East Guy like and ran away," Harris-Moore probably didn't say to the depressed magazine and Chiclets vendor in front of Gate 13 at the airport.

Police collected fingerprints that may help link Harris-Moore to the theft of a Cadillac Escalade from the Norfolk airport earlier this month, which later turned up in Pella, Iowa, with the words "Pella Sucks" spelled on the ground in front of the car with the laces off several pairs of shoes taken from the car's trunk.

>>> MORE THINGS WE HAVE FOUND

It's awesome in the Unitard Universe.

Hurricane Alex has propelled more oil from the Gulf spill onto coastal beaches and sidelined cleanup vessels.

After 25 years on the air Larry King is ending that show we've never actually watched.

What's the difference between Silly Putty and a McNugget? Turns out not much.

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WHAT WE FOUND TODAY >>>

Think before you cross Tacoma's streets.

Kevin Freitas brought his camera to the 100th Monkey party.

BP is performing more risky drilling.

American Apparel on the brink.

Masseuse accuses Al Gore of sexual assault.

WHAT WE HAVE FOUND TODAY >>>

The FCC is going to make the internet less fun.

Al Qaeda released a 24-minute video yesterday stating that new attacks that will kill more Americans are planned.

Here's a knock-knock joke from Roger Daltry

Iran banned two U.N. nuclear inspectors from entering the country today

A fisherman found himself face-to-face with a periscope.

SEE YOUR FUTURE, BE YOUR FUTURE >>>

The Wonder Bread Years

On July 7, 1928, the Chillicothe Baking Company in Chillicothe, Missouri, made history by selling the first loaf of sliced bread. The inventor of the first bread-slicing machine, a former ophthalmologist and jewelry-store owner named Otto Frederick Rohwedder (weirdly, he was born on the same date, July 7, 1880, in Des Moines, Iowa) was right there at the baking company to see the first loaf of Kleen Maid Sliced Bread go through his invention's patented cutting bands to be automatically wrapped in wax paper for sale.

Two years later, Wonder Bread made presliced bread the best thing to happen since ... whatever.

The Continental Baking Company opened its Wonder Bread Bakery in Tacoma in 1934 at 703 S. Sprague Ave. The building actually dates back to 1913 when it was built for the Matthaei Bread Co., the makers of Matthaei's Honey Bread.

The Wonder Bread Building still stands near the corner of South Sixth and Sprague, but many wonder for how much longer. The building's owner has requested a rezone from R-4 (multiple family dwelling district) to C-2 (community commercial district) for future development of a two-story retail/office building with parking. The existing Wonder Bread Building will be demolished as part of the project. 

Public hearing has been scheduled for May 28, 9:30 a.m. inside the City Council Chambers at the Tacoma Municipal Building, 747 Market Street, on the 1st floor.  Concerned citizens may testify at the public hearing or submit comments in writing prior to the public hearing to the City staff. Direct your comments to Dustin Lawrence via dlawrence@cityoftacoma.org or 253.591.5845.

Tuesday's Tacoma City Council meeting

Tuesday, May 18, the Tacoma City Council will consider a resolution that would authorize the procurement and operations agreement with ACS, Inc. to implement a turnkey parking pay station system in the core area of downtown Tacoma. For more information about the parking pay station program, visit www.tacomaparking.com.

The City Council will also consider a resolution that would express opposition to Arizona's State Law Senate Bill 1070, "Support Our Law Enforcement and Safe Neighborhoods Act" and calling for a boycott of the state of Arizona and Arizona-based businesses

MEET CAMERON BENNETT >>>

Chamber musician and soloist Cameron Bennett  - who has had an active and varied career as an administrator, artist and educator - has been named dean of the School of Arts and Communication at Pacific Lutheran University.

Bennett will attend summer school ... as the dean. Get to know him here.

THIS JUST IN >>>

Remember the cocktail cubbyhole with a tiki motif called The Monsoon Room? The exotica lounge disappeared in the Fall of 2008 and the 1022 South lounge emerged from its ashes last year. Well, the Weekly Volcano World Headquarters just received the follow email from former Monsoon Room owner Laura Malone, who now signs her name Kimberly Laura Mychal Malone. Apparently, Malone will resurrect The Monsoon Room close to the Spanish Steps in downtown Tacoma, which Malone urges everyone to help restore said Steps.

Dear Monsoon Room Friends, Family and Lovers alike:

Due to the urgency of the below request we do not have time to fill you in completely...

We hope it is enough to have the insider information that The Monsoon Room will once again be welcoming you into her warm embrace, once again, by the close of November 2010.

Not sure you will recognize her at first. Don't worry, you'll see. We ain't shy about introductions anymore (plus, she's more of a wild woman these days;-)

In the mean time please take notice below!

The Monsoon Room's new projects will be founded in the neighborhood around the Spanish Steps (one of our favorite Tacoma landmarks.) So yes, the request for your votes to preserve and restore this landmark is totally self serving.

...

Vote now to help the City of Tacoma raise funds to restore the Spanish Steps!

Read more...

Comment On This Post

LEGENDARY TACOMA BAND SUED BY OHIO'S GORILLA PRODUCTIONS >>>        

As we've documented before here at the Weekly Volcano, Girl Trouble drummer Bon Von Wheelie is no fan of "pay to play" - or, more accurately, companies she believes rope unsuspecting bands into paying to play shows or compete in battle of the bands style contests.  While Von Wheelie has been the most vocal about her anti pay to play sentiments, it's an opinion all of Girl Trouble shares. It's a cause that's been close to the band's heart for a number of years.

Von Wheelie even created a Web site to help make her opinions known - neverpaytoplay.com

Well, that Web site recently drew the ire of Gorilla Productions, a Ohio-based company that has decided to sue Bon and Girl Trouble for what the company is calling defamation - to the tune of at least $25,000 plus punitive damages (which are allowed in Ohio). Gorilla Productions - which has operations across the country, including the Pacific Northwest – is also seeking to have Bon's anti pay to play Web site shut down immediately pending the outcome of the court case in Ohio. Gorilla is one of the companies Von Wheelie's Web site lists as engaging in pay to play tactics.

This is no joke. It's real. (You can check out a scanned copy of the actual lawsuit online.)

From here in Washington, Girl Trouble's Bon Von Wheelie created a Web site designed to help local bands stay away from something she believes is a scam. Now the entire band is being dragged into court in Ohio because of these Internet published opinions.

This is the strange world we live in.

Girl Trouble doesn't plan on taking the lawsuit sitting down - and the band has no intention of taking the Web site down either, which they believe to be protected by, among other things, freedom of speech.

Furthermore, the band has hired lawyer and Seaweed guitarist Wade Neal to represent them in the case. I spoke with Neal this morning to get the nuts and bolts of the situation. I'll be following up on the story in this week's Volcano.

"This is a weak, baseless claim," says Neal of the lawsuit filed by Gorilla Productions. "Girl Trouble is rightfully angry about it.

"It's ridiculous," Neal continues. "It's nothing but a harassment suit. ... If somebody has resources they can try to put you in the ground.

"The bottom line is Girl Trouble is looking out for the little guy and they don't deserve this. We're going to fight it all the way. It's a dangerously wielded lawsuit."

WHAT WE HAVE FOUND TODAY >>>

Jayne Mansfield's birthday. She would be 76.

Comcast is going to start the RightNetwork.

Greil Marcus on Van Morrison: When That Rough God Goes Riding 

Ash continues to spew from the Eyjafjallajoekull volcano.

Kitteh Roulette

WHAT WE HAVE FOUND TODAY >>>

Apocalyptic volcano ash could ground flights in Europe through the weekend forcing Scandinavians to return home and pray to Surtr of the Fire-Giants of Musphel, then sing traditional folk songs and decorate their hearths with flower garlands and pat idyllic smiling blond Danish girls in pigtails and scarves and perfect IKEA teeth on the head.

Campus thong thief caught with 79 pairs of teeny-tiny panties just before he was to enter the Weekly Volcano's Signs of Summer photography contest.

Christian music artist Jennifer Knapp comes out of the closet. Yes, that closet. Expect to hear some minuscule and shrill group set aside its agenda of eliminating kissing and dancing and the color fuchsia in American and start pestering the homophobic nutjobs in Congress to put a halt to this horrifying act.

It's Kareem Abdul Jabbar's birthday!