BRAD ALLEN: TASTE OF THINGS TO COME >>>

So, this is a picture of the tasty concoction I recently downed for my Drink of the Week column - which will hit  streets tomorrow in the old-school print version of the Weekly Volcano.

Mmmm. Gives me acid reflux just looking at it again.

Can anyone guess where I got it?

MATT DRISCOLL: BLOWN UP A FEW MAILBOXES IN HIS DAY >>>

There are two sides of the fence when it comes to fireworks. You either like to blow shit up, or you don’t. You either like the pops, whistles and bangs, or you hate them. There doesn’t seem to be much middle ground.

Officially, the City of Tacoma is not a fan of fireworks. Not even whistling bungholes, spleen splitters, whisker biscuits, honkey lighters, hoosker doos, hoosker donts, cherry bombs, nipsy daisers - with or without the scooter stick - and whistling kitty chasers.

If you find yourself on the other side of the fireworks fence, it’s enough to harsh your Fourth of July mellow.

But in case you were thinking about risking it, and lighting a few Lady Fingers in defiance of Tacoma’s no fireworks stance, be prepared to pay the price. All fireworks are considered illegal in Grit City â€" however un-gritty it may be - and violators are subject to a $257 fine. According to a friendly “Fireworks are still illegal” press release which the city distributed earlier today, “most fireworks violations are a class 2 civil infraction,” but “citizens using fireworks are still subject to arrest for other charges (i.e. arson, reckless burning, assault).”

No one likes a reckless burner. That’s for sure.

From June 28 through July 6, no fun neighbors or those who just don’t want to see their shed set ablaze by a wayward whistling kitty chaser can call 253.798.4722 to report fireworks violations. According to the city’s press release, “If the fireworks violation appears to put people or property in immediate danger, call 911. The police will respond to fireworks related calls as units become available.”

SUZY STUMP: HOW CAN I LIFT IT ALL? >>>

First of all, the physical strain. Everyone knows that hanging art can weigh 15 pounds, right? Well, imagine carrying 30 of those paintings to your car. That's a whopping 450 pounds. Then imagine hiring someone else full-time who's big enough to carry that kind of weight back and forth from an art gallery to your car and you can understand the kind of stress I'm afraid I'll be under July 2!

Two Vaults Gallery will host a who's who of Tacoma artists for the ICON CEPTS Wednesday, July 2 featuring the following artists: Betsy Diffendal, Ann Meersman, Jennevieve Schlemmer, Jennifer Schaal, Marie Hassett, Carol Milne, Claudia Riedener, Francis & Mario Lorenz, James Ceccanti & Theresa Taverno, Don Myhre, Jennifer Holmes, Di Morgan Graves, Burk Ketcham, Debbie Greenwood, Carolyn Price Dyer, Dan Hill, Houston Wimberly, James Hume, R.R. Anderson, Delores Taylor, Laura Borak, Karin Williams, Vicki Jackson, Chip Van Gilder, Linda Honek, Ryan Loiselle, Lisa Fruichantie, Dorothy McCuistion, J. Lewis Francis, Bea Geller Lynn Di Nino, Mary Mann, Lavonne Sallee, Chris Wooten, Pam Orazem, Brett Carlson, Joni Joachims, Kimberly Sparks  Wilmer & Terry Wilmer, Donna Elizabeth Lough, Lynne Farren, VC Vance, Desiree Flerchinger and Mutt.

Seriously? That's some freakin' talent. How the hell am I going to lift all that fabulous art to my car? I will buy, oh hell yes.

The 38 artists and counting will apparently depict local people, things and events in their artwork. That's intriguing and cool.

Then, to top things off, Paula from Two Vaults is serving wine so count Hume and Loiselle out from helping me to the car with my art.

[Two Vaults Gallery, ICON CEPTS, Wednesday, July 2, 6-8:30 p.m., 602 S. Fawcett, Tacoma, 253.759.6233]

THE ART
The Crow Show
A crow study, by a flock of artists in various media coming together for an art party tonight at the Mad Hat. Sounds like the place to hang your hat. â€" Suzy Stump
[Mad Hat Tea Company, opening night party 5-10 p.m., 1130 Commerce St., Tacoma, 253.441.2111]

MUSIC
Olympia Experimental Music Festival
It seems, judging by the lineup at least, this year’s festival â€" which stretches from Thursday, June 26 through Sunday, June 29 and utilizes downtown Olympia venues the Eagles Hall Basement, the Capitol Theater and the Midnight Sun â€" will be just as intriguing. Perhaps looking to quell last year’s cries from Olympia’s music scene, many bands and artists from the 360 will be represented. Highlights will likely include: Foque Mopus, Hobby Hobby, Departed Dog, KnotPineBox, and Beat Box Fred â€" who’s known around Oly for his remarkable beat boxing skills. Tacoma band L.A. Lungs is also scheduled to perform. â€" Bobble Tiki
[Downtown Olympia, June 26-29, www.myspace.com/olystrangemusic]

COWPUNK
The Snakebites
One of my favorite bands is the Jon Spencer Blues Explosion. While they aren’t a blues band per say, they show love to blues legends like RL Burnside and Junior Kimbrough with a raunchy nod. The Snakebites aren’t really country, but they give a similar raunchy nod to country legends like Hank Williams. I’m calling them cow punk as the Seattle-based duo of Skky Phoenix and Starr Harris relies on volume, distortion and probably Jack Daniels to create a bombastic sound akin to the Shams or 20 Miles. Their crunchy four-chord style is very much in vogue, but something tells me they could give a shit about being current or hip. Their debut, Love, Hate, Rage and Sorrow hits every emotion with a vengeance. After a nine-month hiatus, they are back, energized and ready to kick some ass. â€" Tony Engelhart
[Bob’s Java Jive, with Paris Spleen and The Freakouts, 8 p.m., $3, 2102 S Tacoma Way, Tacoma, 253.475.9843]

LINK: My Life In Black & White and others in the clubs tonight
LINK: Let's eat Italian today.

BOBBLE TIKI: BREAKFAST WITH BOBBLE TIKI >>>

THE DAILY WORD

Cockaigne \kah-KAYN\, noun:
An imaginary land of ease and luxury.

USAGE EXAMPLE: In 1972 Eddie  Money first wrote the song “Two Tickets to a Cockaigne.” Wisely, Money reworked the tune for 1977’s Eddie Money, changing the title to “Two Tickets to Paradise.” The rest, as they say, is rock and roll history.

MORNING NEWS

TACOMA: Extended school day?

OLYMPIA: Needs more parking garages, says the city

SEATTLE: What's next for Bill Gates?

UNITED STATES: Shoot 'em if you got 'em

ENVIRONMENT: What Portland has to say

JUST BIZARRE: Wake up!

MORE STRANGE NEWS:George W. Bush sewage plant

THINGS TO DO TODAY
FILM LISTINGS: Look here
MUSIC LISTINGS: Here’s what’s happening
SHOOT THE SHIT: Weekly Volcano forums

BRAD ALLEN: ROLLER DERBY IN OLYMPIA >>>

Olympia’s Prima Donnas against Tacoma’s Hellbound Homewreckers Saturday, June 28 at 6 p.m. at the Skateland in Olympia. Oly Rollers versus Dockyard Derby Dames!

LINK: OlyBlog's take

STEVE DUNKELBERGER: THEATER THURSDAY >>>

The Tempest
Theater Artists Olympia goes sci-fi with its Shakespeare as it stages a version of The Tempest as if it was a Star Trek episode. A witch rules a desert realm with her lovely daughter, a fairy creature, a beast, and an odd assortment of nymphs and fanciful creatures. All is going relatively well until the folks out looking through the Final Frontier pay a visit because they are lost in the wilderness of space. Then the weird stuff happens.
[Minnaert Performing Arts Center, 8 p.m. Friday-Saturday, 2 p.m. Sunday, $12, South Puget Sound Community College,  2011 Mottman Road S.W., Olympia, 360.357.3471]

Swinging on a Star
The songs of Johnny Burke take to the Paradise Theatre stage in a weave of scenes from a smoky 1920s Speakeasy, for "Dr. Rhythm" and "What's New" to the Bowery for "Pennies from Heaven." Then comes the ever-popular "Your Hit Parade" of the 1930s and the USO shows of World War II and then culminating with the Academy Award winning "Swinging on a Star."

The cast features: Carrie Nelson, Valerie Jolibois, Krista Curry, Stacee Cramer, Adam Randolph, George Ngo and K. James Koop.
[Paradise Theater, through July 6, 7:30 p.m. Friday-Saturday, 4 p.m. Sunday, $10-$20, 9911 Burnham Dr. N.W., Gig Harbor, 253.851.PLAY]

The Rocky Horror Show
Harlequin Productions continues its run of the sex-charged romp following a dark and stormy night The Rocky Horror Show, with some added shows to extend the run.
[State Theater, through July 6, 8 p.m. Thursday-Saturday, 2 p.m. Sunday, 202 Fourth Ave. E., Olympia, 360.7860151]

BRAD ALLEN: JESSE SYKES IN OLYMPIA TONIGHT >>>

Jesse Sykes and the Sweet Hereafter and Earth will perform at the Eagles Hall in Olympia tonight. The Seattle Weekly invited Sykes and Earth front man Dylan Carlson to chat amongst themselves. Should be a good show tonight.

LINK: Earth and Sykes Olympia show info

MATT DRISCOLL: LIKES THE SOUND OF THIS EVENT >>>

Ever wanted to get shitty drunk with Tacoma Mayor Bill Baarsma, not to mention six former mayors from Tacoma’s illustrious past? And I’m not just talking about getting a little tipsy here; I’m talking about shirt off, falling down, rolling in the grass, not going to remember anything in the morning drunk.

Well, while I wouldn’t necessarily recommend it, you’ll have that opportunity this weekend. Even better, it’ll be for a good cause.

This weekend during the Taste of Tacoma, the Metro Parks Foundation will hold their annual Wine and Roses fundraiser. The idea is to turn the Rose Garden at Point Defiance into a big, wine swilling, money raising fracas. Even better, Friday, between 5 and 8 p.m., the Metro Parks Foundation will welcome Mayor Baarsma and six other mayors from Tacoma’s past to turn things up a few notches. Admission to the event is free, but if you want to taste, it’s going to cost you $15 â€" a small price to pay, in my book. Big names scheduled to be on hand â€" and pouring- include Mike Crowley (MBA President), Brian Ebersole (Former Speaker of the House), Karen Vialle, Harold Moss (Former Pierce County Council), and Doug Sutherland (Commissioner of Public Lands). As for all the Tacoma mayors set to be on hand on Friday, according to Drew Ebersole, Executive Director of the Greater Metro Parks Foundation, “It is the first time they have ever gathered together, much less united for a single cause by supporting the Greater Metro Parks Foundation.”

The money raised at the Wine and Roses event will go to worthy Metro Parks causes â€" like further whitening of the lions at Wright Park.

SUZY STUMP: BE THE TALL SHIPS >>>

I have indeed been known to be a relatively bright chick on occasion and could probably learn sufficient primitive UNIX in a month but that implies I don't have a stack of unread books and a pile of unread New Yorkers and Harpers or a bottle of Silver Oak Cab and a million radio shows I never listen to anymore upon, which to spend my copious free time.

That aside (thankfully, huh?), this bright chick is please that the Web site Tall Ships Tacoma 2008 (possibly the greatest event ever and will make Tacoma the most famous place on earth) lists all the community events associated with the event that consumes our city and local daily paper for a week.

Now I don't have to try to figure it all out on my own.  That's smart.