AWESOME BENEFIT SHOW >>>

Tonight's "Team Natalie" benefit concert at the Loft on Cherry - featuring Kill Rock Stars alumni Bangs and The Need, with C Average and doom metal solo project Thrones - is bookended by two more shows boasting the same stellar line-up (The Team hits up Portland tomorrow, and played Seattle's Crocodile Café last night).

Back in April, Bangs' Maggie Vail and friends deejayed a night at Portland hotspot Valentine's, with an eye towards raising more charitable donations. Why all the benevolent gigging? The focus of Vail and Co.'s altruism is former Kill Rock Stars employee Natalie Cox, a prominent figure in the Oly music scene who was diagnosed with angiosarcoma in July of last year. Angiosarcoma is a particularly aggressive and rare form of cancer (approximately 0.1 percent of all cancer cases in the world are angiosarcomas), which usually starts in the blood vessels and then spreads elsewhere.

Friends, family and musicians have rallied around Cox. Read the full story here.

Team Natalie Benefit Show

With The Need, Bangs, C Average, Thrones,
Thursday, July 22, 5 p.m., all ages, The Loft on Cherry, 508 Legion Way, Olympia theloftoncherry.com

DINING NEWS, NIBBLES AND BITS >>>

Coffee Deal: Cutters Point Coffee next to the University of Washington-Tacoma campus will serve 16 oz or larger lattes or mochas today for a buck.

Wine Tasting: Pour at Four in Tacoma's Proctor District hosts a complimentary Gordon Brothers Winery tasting tonight from 5:30-8:30 p.m. Head winemaker Tim Henley travels from Pasco to pour and talk about the wines.

Future Things Are Coming: Bid adieu to one of Bayview School of Cooking's favorite chefs, French Chef Thierry Liot, before he returns to his homeland for further culinary adventures. Wednesday, July 28, Liot will offer his last class, A "Grate" Leg of Lamb, at the school from 6-8:30 p.m. The class costs $50. Reserve your spot at 360.754.1448.

Food Matters: Afraid your waiter hates you? Some pointers for a civil service experience.

LINK: Good lord you need a happy hour

LINK: Join the Nosh League

LINK: South Sound Restaurant Guide

INSIDE TODAY'S WEEKLY VOLCANO >>>

Here & Now: Generations of art at Fulcrum Gallery, by Alec Clayton

Spreading the word: The Outfit Theatre Company proves important theater is still around and still possible, by Joe Izenman

Mackers, animal style: Animal Fire Theatre goes all out with Macbeth, by Christian Carvajal

LINK: Arts and entertainment events in the South Sound

LINK: Click for movie times

The Weekly Volcano follows B & C-list celebrities so you don't have to >>>

Just like most good, new-age, social media applications, Twitter allows people to share and be privy to once personal, almost wholly pointless information about peoples' lives. It's seemingly endless. While Twitter is mostly full of everyday, ho-hum people - just like you and me, sharing info about what type of oatmeal we ate for breakfast and where we get our hair cut - Twitter is also a magnet for the moderately-famous.

Stars of yesterday, illiterate millionaire athletes, former cast members of Saved By the Bell - you can follow them all, intimately, on Twitter.

But, you've got standards. We get that.

That's why we'll do it for you, in a feature we like to call Weekly Volcano Twitter Stalker.

Today, checking in with...

John Stamos!

June 30: John Stamos's brother still can't hit that high note.

"lovely dinner with my old buddy matt stone last night- for you SOUTH PARK fans--" 5:11 p.m., via Twitpic

July 3: John Stamos explores culturally diverse yoga

"I love mexico! beautiful country, good 'family' people. off to mexican yoga- whatever that is." 6:20 a.m., via mobile web

June 29: John Stamos has THE DANCE inside him

"tap lesson: pull back into a gregory hines/m.j.tribute/ toe stand/ i still suck" 1:03 p.m., via Twitpic

June 25: Oh snap, Uncle Jesse.

"my day at knott's berry farm with the olsen twins" 11:12 a.m., via Twitpic

Tune in tomorrow for more hot Twitter Stalking action from the Weekly Volcano.

BONUS PIC OF BOB SAGET GRABBING JOHN STAMOS'S ASS!

THE LOWDOWN ON WHAT'S UP THIS WEEKEND >>>

WEATHER REPORT

Friday: Partly cloudy, hi 74, lo 54

Saturday: Sunny and clear, hi 81, lo 56

Sunday: Sunny and clear, hi 83, lo 56

>>> FRIDAY, JULY 23: 19TH CENTURY FAMILY FUN NIGHT

It was a time when men would talk about hunting for some tail and they would actually be referring to furry rodents. It was a time when the world would stop for a spot of tea in the middle of the afternoon and pinkies stood erect with each sip for a porcelain teacup. Welcome to the 19th century.  The Fort Nisqually Living History Museum hosts a 19th Century Family Fun Night as a way to show folks how life was like back in the day when (inappropriate laughing) England was a world power.

• Fort Nisqually Living History Museum, 6-9 p.m., 3-$6, Point Defiance Park, 5400 N. Pearl St., Tacoma, 253.591.5339

>>> SATURDAY, JULY 24: PARTY WITH MARK LINDQUIST

Pierce County Prosecutor and author Mark Lindquist has a lot of famous friends. Dude dated Molly Ringwald, for god sake. I mean c'mon. Not only does he know a lot of famous people, he's not above using their names to raise a little dough - as evident by the fact he'll be auctioning off autographed books and bottles of wine Saturday at King's Books to help support his campaign. Perfect if you like stuff signed by famous people, or just want to hear Lindquist talk about the time he accidentally cockblocked Anthony Michael Hall. – Michael Swan

• King's Books, 6:30 p.m. $50 per person, 18 St. Helens Ave., Tacoma, marklindquist.org

>>> SATURDAY, JULY 24-SUNDAY, JULY 25: STAR LITE SWAP MEET

Want to show the out-of-town guests a microcosm of Tacoma? Drag yourself out of bed on Saturday and Sunday morning and head toward the Star Lite Swap Meet. Not only will you find all kinds of junk to buy for next to nothing - some of which might just be antique treasures - but you will also find all kinds of crazy people trying to sell their clothes, jewelry, books and children. You can get some real bargains here on clothes, cameras, car batteries, typewriters, shoes, sunglasses, socks, knives, hats, fruits and vegetables, tools, CDs, cell phones, furniture, lunch boxes, herbs, really bad art, lamps, vitamins, toothpaste and underwear. It's a great way to kill a morning. The best time to be there is right when it opens. - MS

• Star Lite Theater, 7:30 a.m. to 4:30 p.m., 84th and South Tacoma Way, Lakewood, 253.588.8090

>>> SATURDAY, JULY 24-SUNDAY, JULY 25: ETHNIC FEST

It's time again for Ethnic Fest, an annual event that's brought Pierce County's diversity together in celebration since 1986. Some of the best festival feeding you'll find - sorry Taste of Tacoma - Ethnic Fest also packs visual arts, performing arts, dance, crafts and fun into two days of multi-cultural, multi-lingual, multi-adjective-for-awesome action. Sealing the deal: Ethnic Fest is free. – MS

• Wright Park, noon to 7 p.m., free admission, 3501 South I Street, Tacoma

>>> WHERE OUR STAFF IS GOING

MATT DRISCOLL Editor and String Cheese Addict
Oh, yah, sure - ask me what I'm doing this weekend, Michael Swan over at the Weekend Hustle Desk. That's so like you. Dick. You know damn well what I'll be doing this weekend. I'll be locked in my office feverishly putting the finishing touches on Best of Tacoma 2010 (now in spectacular 3-D!) - relegated to sad, infrequent communications with my friends and loved ones kind of like Sam Rockwell in Moon. In honesty, the only reason I'm not actually bitching about this fact is because I know damn well I'll have, like, six margaritas at Wednesday's Best of Tacoma Premiere Party at Masa, say something really embarrassing, and/or take my pants off and pee on the side of something inappropriate while surrounded by a group of people that aren't expecting it. I guess it all comes out in the wash. ...

PAUL SCHRAG Senior Contributor
Friday, I'm heading to Olympia to hang out in the studio with Smoke and Eprhyme, working feverishly on another K Records release. Then it's Warren G on Saturday at Hell's Kitchen. On Sunday, it's brunch with Eprhyme at Quickie Too, and a trip to Seattle to watch him perform with the Erev Ravs and DJ Sweet Elite. Will round out the weekend with a Kabbalistic lesson teaching about the ancient Jewish holiday of Tu B'Av. Either that, or get wasted all weekend. I don't know yet.

NIKKI TALOTTA Feature Writer
This weekend is my bridal shower! I'm going to sit around with my favorite ladies and get boozy and pervy, all the while receiving gifts and snacking on seafood. Mmmm, no complaints this weekend.

STEPH DEROSA Columnist
I'm still licking my wounds from the prison-like Girl Scout camp I "worked" at this past week. Those little cookie peddlers run on high-powered lithium batteries, I think. In order for my bruises to heal and my scabs to repair themselves, I have taken retreat by the Westport beaches for the rest of the week and into the weekend. My doctor says that the only way to remedy my physical and mental injuries would be to partake in drinking copious amounts of red wine paired with sharp cheeses and adult conversation. My new mantra: Girl Scout cookies taste so fine, but nothing tastes better than a deep, red wine.

THE REV. ADAM MCKINNEY Feature Writer
I might have to go see Warren G at Hell's Kitchen. Coolio, Tone Loc, Vanilla Ice, whatever (OK, I'm a little upset about missing Vanilla Ice), but I can't pass up Warren G. He's so smooooth.

JOE IZENMAN Music/Theater Critic
This weekend I abandon you all and flee to Portland, to drink at the Oregon Brewer's Festival and turn 27. Were I in Tacoma, though, I would most assuredly attend the Parkway Tavern's 75th birthday and the Erich Sachs for Pierce County Council kickoff barbecue.

KRIS BLONDIN Food/Wine Writer
Chilly D and I are taking the train to Portland for the Oregon Beer Festival. It has been years since I've been. Time to get my beer on!

JENNIFER JOHNSON: Lifestyle/Leisure Writer
Driving back from Utah in a very slow meandering course through Idaho and Oregon to arrive in T-town Monday.

CHRISTIAN CARVAJAL: Theater Critic
They say if you buy a tuxedo, life presents you with opportunities to use it, an idea that turns out to be true. Ergo I'm emceeing a Kokua Mad Hatter's Tea Party (isn't that ironic? Don'tcha think?) to aid Washingtonians with disabilities. It's all practice for my talk show.

ALEC CLAYTON: Visual Arts Critic
This weekend I'll be writing the next great American novel.

LINK: More arts and entertainment events in the South Sound

FRIDAY, JULY 23, 2010 >>>

1. Songwriters Zach Tillman from Barsuk Records' Pearly Gate Music, Jenna Conrad from Troubletown and Colin Reynolds, as well as slam poets and live painters perform at Tacoma Round #11 at 8 p.m. inside the Pantages Theater Rehearsal Hall at Ninth and Broadway.

2. Singer/songwriter David Gardner will perform from 5:30-8 p.m. in the Harmon Tap Room's outdoor beer garden.

3. The Fort Nisqually Living History Museum hosts a 19th Century Family Fun Night from 6-9 p.m. featuring games, music and dancing of the mid-1800s.

4. Chances are you've got a couple dumb friends. It's the law of averages. Well, Hamlet was no different; Rosencrantz and Guildenstern may not have been the sharpest, but they were his buddies - even obliviously escorting him to banishment. Tonight, the Outfit Theatre Project's Rosencrantz and Guildenstern are Dead officially opens at Lakewood Playhouse at 8 p.m.

5. The White Zombie tribute band Astro-Creep as well as Klover Jane, Smoochknob and Mechanism perform at Hell's Kitchen beginning at 9 p.m.

LINK: New movies open today

LINK: New concerts go on sale today

DINING NEWS, NIBBLES AND BITS >>>

New Thing: Jubilee Cupcakes & Vintage Candy opens today in the Proctor District. Sweet!

Wine And Meat: Today and tomorrow Pour at Four wine bar will be offering a rib and wine flight featuring meaty ribs prepared three different ways - Korean BBQ, Memphis Dry Rub, and Texas Wet - each with its own side dish and paired with a wine from 5-9:30 p.m.

Future Things Are Coming: Senora Lucia Shelley hosts a Mexican taco class Tuesday, July 27, 6 p.m., at the Bayview School of Cooking in Olympia. The cost is $45 a person. Reserve your spot at 360.754.1448.

Food Matters: McDonald's plays local with our state fries.

LINK: Good lord you need a happy hour

LINK: Join the Nosh League

LINK: South Sound Restaurant Guide

WHAT WE HAVE FOUND TODAY >>>

Actor Larry Manetti is 63.

>>> SOUTH SOUND SPECIFIC

Fort Nisqually was the first European settlement on Puget Sound. The Hudson's Bay Company (HBC) of London, a vast fur trading enterprise chartered by King Charles of England in 1670, established it in 1833. The original site was on the beach and plains above the Nisqually River delta in the present town of DuPont, Washington. Today Fort Nisqually, including two of the original buildings, is located inside Tacoma's Point Defiance Park. Fort Nisqually is owned and operated as a Living History Museum by Metro Parks of Tacoma, which hosts a 19^th Century Fun Night tonight. (Thanks Metro Parks)

>>> WORD OF THE DAY

velutinous [ve-'loot-en-us] adjective [From New Latin veluthnus, from Medieval Latin velutum, velvet, from Vulgar Latin villutus.]

Covered with dense, soft, silky hairs; velvety, velvetlike

Usage example: Legislative candidate Doug Richards wiped his brow with his velutinous forearm, distraught over his past mistakes, but continued to pray to the velutinous beast of wisdom and caring.

>>> DID YOU READ THIS?

TIME MAGAZINBE REPORTS: "On the evening of July 21, the president of Argentina, Cristina Fernandez de Kirchner, convened a ceremony at the Casa Rosada government house in downtown Buenos Aires to formally sign into law a bill legalizing gay marriage. The measure, narrowly passed by the Argentine Congress on July 15, was no small leap for the land of the laconic gaucho cowboy, a place whose Constitution required the head of the Argentine state to be Catholic until a 1994 reform."

The news sent protests through neighboring Uruguay, well, mostly among exceptionally uptight fear-drunk Uruguayans who have desperately warped and straightjackeded ideas of what love truly means and who can't sleep at night without at least four Valium and a dozen deep sniffs of rubber cement and the soothing voice of Dr. Maria - the Dr. Laura of Uruguay - on looped tape.

>>> NEWS TO US

The Senate passed a $60 billion bill to fund President Obama's Afghanistan troop surge.

Everything is going to be OK! Apple unveiled a free case for iPhone 4s today.

Some haters crashed the Comic-con. Dude, that's lame.

Morning Spew posts every Monday, Wednesday and Friday on this blog. Sometimes, it even posts in the morning.

Meet Christophe of Hilltopia. He just joined our Community. Neat.

LIVE MUSIC TONIGHT IN THE SOUTH SOUND >>>

ROCK:Toward the end of Eightball Break's song, "Kickin' Myself in the Ass," the guitars smooth out and lead singer Nick Millward breaks it down for us, saying we'll soon regret not asking that girl out when we see her walking with a lesser man. It's a slyly winking acknowledgement from Eightball Break that, beneath all of their rock 'n' roll attitude and pop-punk flourishes, in the end it's all about the same stuff that men have found themselves obsessing over since men could obsess. Take most any rowdy rock band and wipe away that posturing, and what you're left with is Del Shannon all over again: pining and lovesick, kicking himself for not having the guts to talk to that girl. With Young Sportsmen, Eccentric Souls, Friday, July 23, 9 p.m., Cover TBA, The New Frontier Lounge, 301 E. 25th St., Tacoma, 253.572.4020 - Rev. Adam McKinney

INDIE ROCK: San Francisco's The New Up kind of sounds like an updated, slowed-down version of the old Hammerbox. Like, Carrie Akre's Hammerbox - all ferocious and female and flannel covered, circa 1990-whatever. But don't get me wrong; this five-piece is no rehash. While the scene stealing rock guitars, gut-punch hooks and the voice of female frontwoman ES Pitcher lend themselves to Hammerbox comparisons, there's definitely an air of originality to the indie rock The New Up pumps out. It can shape-shift from classic rock to iPod-contemporary at a moments notice, and with no loss of impact - which is a skill few current bands seem to posses or even desire. After releasing the debut EP in 2008, the well received Broken Machine, The New Up is planning the release of a new EP, Gold, in August. With Offshore Radio, Friday, 23, 9 p.m., Cover TBA, The 4^th ave Tavern, 210 Fourth Ave. E., Olympia, 360.786.1444 - Matt Driscoll

METAL: Tacoma's Osama Bin Rockin did not win "Best Band Name" in the 2010 Weekly Volcano Best of Tacoma poll. That's unfortunate, because they probably should have. Sure, there are some pretty sick-ass band names out there, some fairly memorable monikers, but just hearing this band mentioned makes me grin - every time. Perhaps I'm just simple? I don't know. Either way, the sonic cacophony presented by Osama Bin Rockin is exactly the kind of guttural, grindcore goodness you'd expect from a band not afraid to name-check the most reviled man in America on their calling card. Of course, the band also has a song called "God Is Totally Gay," so you get the point. It's rapid. It's loud. It's definitely not pretty. And it's pretty fucking metal. Be sure to buy the band a round of PBRs after their set. Friday, July 23, 9 p.m., no cover, O'Malley's Irish Pub, 2403 Sixth Ave., Tacoma, 253.627.9403 - MD

LINK: More live music in the South Sound tonight

The Weekly Volcano follows B & C-list celebrities so you don't have to >>>

Just like most good, new-age, social media applications, Twitter allows people to share and be privy to once personal, almost wholly pointless information about peoples' lives. It's seemingly endless. While Twitter is mostly full of everyday, ho-hum people - just like you and me, sharing info about what type of oatmeal we ate for breakfast and where we get our hair cut - Twitter is also a magnet for the moderately-famous.

Stars of yesterday, illiterate millionaire athletes, former cast members of Saved By the Bell - you can follow them all, intimately, on Twitter.

But, you've got standards. We get that.

That's why we'll do it for you, in a feature we like to call Weekly Volcano Twitter Stalker.

Today, checking in with...

Michael Ian Black

July 23: Michael Ian Black is all about looks when it comes late night TV hosts

"Whichever plastic surgeon turned Jimmy Kimmel into Fred Flintstone is amazing." 2 hours ago, via Web

July 22: Michael Ian Black isn't shy about his desires

"I kind of want to see some Klingon porn." 11:56 p.m., via Web

July 20: Michael Ian Black has a very good point

"How awesome would it be if Lindsay converts to Islam and gets a face tattoo? #iheartmiketyson" 6:48 p.m., via web

July 20: Michael Ian Black has ideas

"I'm thinking of start a new magazine for guys who like stuff that girls like but aren't gay and also drink Dr. Pepper and are me." 9:11 a.m., via web

July 18: Michael Ian Black moonlights as a bachelor party planner

"Chicken strips. Pretty good as a food. Totally fucking weird as a bachelor party activity." 8:51 p.m., via web

Tune in next week for more hot Twitter Stalking action from the Weekly Volcano.