The Weekly Volcano follows the people you're too embarrassed to >>>

Just like most good, new-age, social media applications, Twitter allows people to share and be privy to once personal, almost wholly pointless information about peoples' lives. It's seemingly endless. While Twitter is mostly full of everyday, ho-hum people - just like you and me, sharing info about what type of oatmeal we ate for breakfast and where we get our hair cut - Twitter is also a magnet for the moderately-famous.

Stars of yesterday, illiterate millionaire athletes, former cast members of Saved By the Bell - you can follow them all, intimately, on Twitter.

But, you've got standards. We get that.

That's why we'll do it for you, in a feature we like to call Weekly Volcano Twitter Stalker.

This week, checking in with...

Ice T

May 5: Ice T reveals himself as a closet LOL Cats fan (we have no idea what this means).

"Daily Pic: A 'Final Level' Cat.... Maaan! I understand you player..." via Twitpic, 5:30 p.m.

April 14: Not braggin', just sayin'

"Lucky for me, I sold a few records before the record bizz crashed. I appreciate these more now than ever!" via Twitpic, 9:13 a.m.

April 13: Ice T talks about his dog Spartacus some more - who, don't forget, has more Twitter followers than you'll ever have

"Daily Pic: 'Spartacus' bumped into his big cousin 'Beast' in Little Italy today.. It's good to be connected.

Tune in tomorrow for more tweets from the life of Ice T

WE HAVE A WINNER >>>

Remember the Tacoma Art Place T-shirt design contest? Maybe you need a refresher.

Anyway, local graphic artist Laurie Davenport won, walking away with the $250 prize.

"I decided to enter this contest because I've admired the idea behind Tacoma Art Place since it started and enjoy watching its growth and success - talent doesn't respect class, age or economic boundaries, but it does need nurturing," said Davenport in a press release.

BEYOND THE EGG MCMUFFIN >>>

A great breakfast, in some worlds, means real maple syrup, a stack of hotcakes, farm-fresh eggs, and coffee. In Mexico, it means chiles and eggs - spiciness of one and the mildness of the other make a perfect whole. Below are three of my favorite local Mexican breakfasts - mainly because they actually serve it during breakfast hours instead of opening around 11 a.m. as most Mexican joints.

La Huerta International Market #2: This Mexican market opens at 8 p.m. (sometimes 9 a.m.!) with chilaquiles and huevos rancheros on the menu, among other authentic delights. The huevos rancheros are a revelation with fried eggs sunny-side up, a thousand sliced jalapeños, tomato sauce with hot chilies and onion, served over two fried corn tortillas with homemade salsa and additional, soft darn tasty corn tortillas on the side. Exit the tiny dining space to the right if you don't want to see the meat counter in all its splendor. Opens 8 a.m. daily, 5605 Pacific Ave. S., Tacoma, 253.474.1727, Web site

Masa Comida Mexicana: The red enchilada sauce works well with Masa's huevos rancheros - two thin. Lightly fried flour tortillas topped with your pick egg preparation, a tasty black and pinto bean puree, catija cheese, cilantro and avocado. The sauce, slightly runny, is fiery and sweet, with the earthy, roasty-toasty quality we always associate with the sun-ripened chiles of New Mexico. The dish comes with a side of soft black and pinto beans and a large mound of fluffy rice, or Masa's honey jalapeno home fries. A Masa Smirnoff Jalapeno Mary or Masa Fruit Mimosa are fine additions. Classic rock music always serenades morning diners. Breakfast is served 9 a.m. to 3 p.m. Saturday and Sunday. 2811 Sixth Ave., Tacoma, 253.254.0560, Web site.

Taqueria Burrito Loco: Sure, this tiny joint in a strip mall behind a gas station serves damn tasty tacos, proven by their Final Cuatro appearance in our Tournament of Tacos. But it's the breakfast burrito that makes me glad I've secured a parking place in the bumper-to-bumper lot that's often populated with monster trucks. You'll find it listed on the takeout board above the counter: stuffed with Mexican sausage, eggs, rice, whole beans, onion, tomatoes, cilantro and ample sour cream. It's everything you'd expect from a bigger-than-your-head breakfast burrito - and a whole lot more. Opens 10 a.m. daily, 5502 Orchard St., University Place (on the edge of it), 253.474.1433, map

LINK: South Sound Restaurant Guide

FRIDAY, MAY 7, 2010 >>>

1. 72 hours is not a long time. The teams competing in this year's Grand Cinema 72 Hour Film Festival - a yearly Tacoma institution - know this all too well. Last weekend, frenzied packs of Tacoma filmmakers dashed around T-town, hurriedly capturing on film all the entries that will make up this year's manic, competitive filmmaking celebration - set to go down tonight at the Rialto Theater at 7 p.m. Who will win? How will all the "mandatory elements" - including finding something important in a bag within the first minute, incorporating a map, and the line of dialogue, "Should I know what that means?" - be worked into all of the entries? Only time will tell.

2. Seattle artist Ben Hirschkoff will be at the tiny Telephone Room Gallery from 6-9 p.m. for the opening of his brass chandelier show. Titled Eternal Flickr Flame, Hirschkoff's sculpture celebrates the artificial and symbolizes renewal, creation and destruction.

3. Roller derby has come full-tilt. It's on like Donkey Kong, as they say; but this wasn't always the case. Way back when (2001), in Austin, a group of tough-ass women with a passion resurrected the past, with added badass attitude, and created the roller-skating beast we know today. Tonight at 9 p.m. inside the Capitol Theater, the national champion Oly Rollers will host director Bob Ray for a screening of Hell on Wheels, his award-winning documentary about how it all began. Ray will answer questions after the screening.

4. Local country star Jonathan Harris holds a release party for his Thanks To You I'm Free CD beginning at 6 p.m. inside the Tacoma Sportsmen's Club.

5. To the joy of underage girls everywhere, Paris Spleen announces they are still a band. Despite a dramatic onstage breakup last fall, they will continue to deliver the goods. The goods being bass-driven disco punk, bad attitudes, and a multi-racial mélange of shirtless guys who can dance, which you can see at 9 p.m. with the Hotels and Oh Dear! inside The New Frontier Lounge.

LINK: New movies open today

NOSH PIT >>>

Looks Tasty: There is a tall forest of bread pudding in Mandolin Café's dessert case for $5 a slab. Also, creamy chicken Dijon is the soup du jour.

Spring Festival: The Hub's Pray For Sun annual party goes down today beginning at 4 p.m. Myles Crew will perform live from 4-7 p.m. A DJ will spin beginning at 10 p.m. Food and drink specials, prizes and giveaways will spring up throughout the party.

Friday's Uncorked: The Bayview School of Cooking in Olympia will pour Oregon Pinot Noir for its Friday wine tasting from 5-7:30 p.m. The cost is $12. By the way, Bayview also offers a Vietnam Culinary Tour with Pranee Khruasanit Halvorsen and Nancy Hebb Monday, May 10 at 6 p.m. There are a few spots left in the class, which costs $50.

Get Them While You Can: The Wine Bank in University Place picked up the last few cases of McKinley Springs Winery's 2006 red blend from its distributor. This afternoon the wine shop will be pouring tastes, as well as selling the bottles at special prices.

Lucky Mothers: Paddy Coyne's Irish Pub in downtown Tacoma will allow moms to eat free on Mother's Day - breakfast, lunch or dinner - with the purchase of two or more entrees.

Future Things Are Coming: The dates - yes dates - have been set for the Tacoma Craft Beer Festival: Friday, Oct. 1 from 6-10 p.m. AND Saturday, Oct. 2 from noon to 8 p.m. That's right, it's now two days. Once again, it will be held at The Foss Waterway Seaport, but expect a different entrance and exit, as well as a separation of the smoking and food areas. Also, there will be more breweries in the house. This year the festival will benefit Pierce County's Emergency Food Network.

LINK: Wine and beer tastings, dinners and events

LINK: South Sound Restaurant Guide

LINK: Send us your restaurant and lounge news

FUTURE THINGS ARE COMING >>>

Doesn't it seem as if there are a hundred music festivals coming our way this summer?

Here's another one:

The South Sound Blues Association will embed its Back to Beale Street Blues 2011 competition into Gig Harbor's annual Maritime Gig Festival, which will be held June 5 in downtown Gig Harbor. We posted the press release after the break:

Read more...

FUTURE THINGS ARE COMING >>>

There has been a lot of great news about rocker Bret Michaels lately. First, his brain hemorrhage brought him closer to his girlfriend. And now we discover he's coming to the Puyallup Fair Sept. 10.

This just in from the Puyallup Fair World Headquarters:

Puyallup, WA - May 7, 2010 - The 2010 Puyallup Fair will be rocking on opening night, Friday, Sept. 10, thanks to the Puyallup Rodeo Justin Boots Playoffs, followed by a performance by Bret Michaels, front man for the legendary rock band, Poison. Michaels is a multi-platinum superstar with the #1 timeless smash hit, "Every Rose Has its Thorn.

The Friday, Sept. 10 Bret Michaels "Roses and Thorns World Tour 2010" concert follows the Puyallup Rodeo, which kicks off at 6:30 p.m. The concert is part of Columbia Bank's Puyallup Fair Concert Series at the Puyallup Fair & Events Center. Tickets go on sale Saturday, May 15 at 9 a.m. here and Ticketmaster outlets. Prices are $50 for Golden Saddle / $35 / $30, and include Fair gate admission, and seats are reserved.

The Weekly Volcano follows the people you're too embarrassed to >>>

Just like most good, new-age, social media applications, Twitter allows people to share and be privy to once personal, almost wholly pointless information about peoples' lives. It's seemingly endless. While Twitter is mostly full of everyday, ho-hum people - just like you and me, sharing info about what type of oatmeal we ate for breakfast and where we get our hair cut - Twitter is also a magnet for the moderately-famous.

Stars of yesterday, illiterate millionaire athletes, former cast members of Saved By the Bell - you can follow them all, intimately, on Twitter.

But, you've got standards. We get that.

That's why we'll do it for you, in a feature we like to call Weekly Volcano Twitter Stalker.

This week, checking in with...

Ice T

April 9: Ice T ReTweets the haters

"RT @P_Chandler:You tedious thug. No, you CAN'T act or converse w/out swearing. Her music is too clever for your pea brain to comprehend." via TweetDeck, 6:35 p.m.

"RT @CommunitySyndic: Man, Ice T is such a fucking tool. How dare he tell Aimee Mann to eat a hot bowl of dicks. What does that even mean?" via TweetDeck, 6:36 p.m.

April 9: Ice T gets a little emotional via Twitter. (FYI: FLTG seems to stand for Ice T's "Twitter gang" - the Final Level Twitter Gang.)

"FLTG HISTORICAL PHOTO: "This is the exact moment I met my wife for the first time..." Check the smile!" via TweetDeck, 9:27 a.m.

April 8: The "Single Greatest Tweet of all Time" - as declared by the Village Voice

Hey @aimeemann stop worrying bout my acting bitch, and worry about your WACK ass music. In the mean time.. Eat a hot bowl of Dicks! Ice T" via TweetDeck, 9:00 a.m.

Tune in next week for more Twitter-stalking from the Weekly Volcano

BRING ON THE WEEKEND >>>

I put sunglasses on during my drive to work this morning. And you know what? I actually meant it today. Sometimes I put on the old Target brand shades just because my eyes are bloodshot, or I had one too many margaritas at dinner the night before. But today - today was different. Today the sun was out and you could tell it was for real. There's nothing quite like the promise of the weekend kissed by the sun.

Friday is a beautiful thing.

Without further ado, here's this week's Prefunk - complete with the obligatory picture of a dog or cat drinking beer.

Note: I'm getting low on pictures of alcoholic pets. If you've got a good camera phone shot of Spot lapping up Michelob Ultra, send it my way and see your lovable - booze loving - pet immortalized forever here at the Prefunk. It'll be awesome. I promise.

MOTOPONY AND THE PAINKILLERS @ JAZZBONES

Saturday, May 8

Jazzbones has more personalities than Sybil. It's a frat bar, a sushi joint, a DJ spot, the place where Tab Benoit or Tim Reynolds play when they come to town, and a rockaraoke and Jager shot Mecca. It's many things to many people - much of the time just before they vomit Hypnotiq and raw fish all over their sexy jeans.

Saturday night, Jazzbones displays yet another side of itself when the eclectic bar welcomes hipster extraordinaire Daniel Blue and his band Motopony - presumably after making the long scooter trek down from their home in Seattle - for a show with The Painkillers and Shim.

Then, after Motopony dishes out its last Spoon-esque, tortured artist wail, and all the empty Pabst glasses and shed beard hair is cleaned up, DJ Switch will welcome the shiny, popped collar, fake tanned crowd in for a couple hours of low-level T-Town bumping and grinding.

It's going to be a hot night! Or just a diverse one. You make the call..

PREFUNK: The bottom line is you need to come prepared. In a perfect world, you'd be able to wear your DJ dancing clothes under your ironic, hipster clothes - and just peel off the sweat-stained American Apparel v-neck after Motopony wraps up and be ready for the DJ. Unfortunately, hipster jeans will never allow this.

So, spend the moments leading up to Saturday night at Jazzbones preparing a hipster & DJ night duffle bag. Be sure to pack extra socks, your stick of Old Spice Sport, and at least one excuse to use on the first person to ask you, "Who exactly are you trying to be, man?"

LONGHORN SALOON BEER PONG TOURNAMENT

Sunday, May 9

Honestly, don't even bother showing up for the Longhorn Saloon's Sunday Beer Pong Tournament. The Weekly Volcano OWNS beer pong. We were hella good in college - hella good! We're sure we still have it! How can we not? We were two time campus champions - even if we blacked out for both trophy presentations. It doesn't matter! We'll be spending all day Saturday in our garages practicing with ping-pong balls and plastic cups; and on Sunday we'll be at the Longhorn Saloon kicking ass.

Or we'll just stay home, go to Costco with the family, eat Hamburger Helper for dinner and watch a little History Channel. We can't decide.

PREFUNK: Bone up on the specific rules used for beer pong at the Longhorn Saloon. Any experienced beer-ponger will tell you every court - every venue - has its own rules and own special traits. How does the ping-pong ball bounce? Is wind a factor? How full of beer are the cups? Are you allowed to flash your junk at an opposing player, just they shoot, to distract him/her (WSU style)?

These are all things you should know. Study up before heading to the Longhorn on Sunday.

See you next week.

TODAY IN DISAPPOINTMENT >>>

Lakewood isn't the al fresco dining capital of this state. It's not even in the ballpark. But damn it, it's lovely out and my mood lately screams Vitamin D deficiency. So off I went to Vive Bene, an Italian bistro close to Clover Park High school. While the view of busy Gravelly Lake Drive traffic isn't ideal, their small patio is totally effin under the sun.

Pulling in for a late lunch I see the sadness, three metal outdoor tables chained en masse without any sign of happiness.

Bummer.

Still, pasta or a pannini was on the brain. I popped inside and doubled the occupancy.

Then I ordered a cheeseburger. I don't know. It read fancy with Ciabatta bread and all. And I'm always on the lookout for a good burger.

I'm surprised how quick the burger arrived since the preparation time of my requested medium rare option must have been doubled. It was overcooked, to say the least.

The patty was sliced, stacked and quite dry, not exhibiting much in the way of juiciness; and the bun - its two-inch wide minimalist artistic virtues aside - was completely useless. One bite and it looked like a scene from the Hurt Locker. I went on fork and knife duty.

The only bright spot I can manage was the cheddar cheese - which was nicely melted to the point of appearing like a translucent veil blanketing the disappointing patty.

My point here is not to be overly critical. Surely, bad dining experiences happen. That said, I really effin wanted that perfect experience today. I wanted warm sunshine on my face, flowery scents and fresh flavors - and it wasn't even close.

Vive Bene

11126 Gravelly Lake Dr. SW
Lakewood, WA 98499
253.588.8989